


The Book of Life

by Elthorian



Category: Death Note & Related Fandoms, Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Bottom L (Death Note), F/M, Gay Sex, Good Yagami Light, Homophobic Language, Internalized Homophobia, Large Cock, M/M, Rimming, Top Yagami Light, death note manga
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-10-02
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-08 03:14:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 71,820
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26778685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elthorian/pseuds/Elthorian
Summary: Kira has been defeated and lies on the floor bullet ridden and in agony. Ryuk is ready to write his name down and end this. No mortal can stop Light from facing his ultimate justice, but something far bigger then anything, anyone can understand is about to take place and it will change the world forever.
Relationships: Amane Misa/Yagami Light, L/Yagami Light, Stephen Gevanni | Stephen Loud/Yagami Light, Yagami Light/Original Male Character(s)
Comments: 158
Kudos: 123





	1. The End of the Beginning

**Author's Note:**

> Hi there. If you're reading this, this is my first attempt at writing fanfiction so please leave kudos and comments as like any author I will use them to get better and also hopefully for encouragement 😊. I hope you enjoy my version of Death note.  
> P.s. this is dedicated to AnotherLostSoul who has given me some of the best fanfiction I've ever read and helped me get through the trauma of chapter 37 of the anime. 😉

**The Book of Life**

**Chapter 1**

Near, or as he was now known, Nate River, stared down at Kira, or as he was known, Light Yagami, as he thrashed in agony from the bullet holes in his body. Blood was streaming from the wounds and while they were not fatal Near knew they must be horribly painful from the way Light was screaming and crying out.

He called for Misa to come and help him, and cursed Teru Mikami for being a worthless pile of garbage. Then with a sudden evil smile he turned towards Ryuk and begged him, pleading with clear desperation to kill everyone in the warehouse for him.

Ryuk sneered at Light lifting up his pen and said “All right, I'll write”. Near’s mind scrambled as everyone yelled in terror, trying to shoot the Shinigami before he could write down their names but the bullets passed harmlessly through the God of Death. Terrified, Near realized that he was now responsible for all these people's deaths until with an evil smile Ryuk turned the death note towards Light and everyone could see him writing the Japanese characters for Yagami Light.

Clearly to torment Light, who was now screaming how he didn't want to die, Ryuk slowly wrote down the final characters.

Just as he was writing in the last one, Near saw a flutter of black appear in his peripheral vision.

Suddenly Ryuk's hand froze and the pen in his hand snapped like a twig. Ryuk stared dumbfounded at his pen and Near turned his gaze towards a brand new figure standing in the warehouse.

Ryuk, who was still staring at his broken pen, turned toward the figure in black as he spoke Ryuk’s name, every syllable trembling with rage and power. Ryuk took one look at him and shrieked an unearthly scream of terror and fear, and his wings snapped out as he tried to soar into the sky, clearly frantic to get away. However the stranger lifted his hand and snapped his fingers and Ryuk's wings shattered, dropping the Shinigami back to the mortal realm.

Near starred in absolute fascination at the man in black, and as he stepped forward Near could make him out clearly for the first time. A starkly handsome face with blond hair sweeping back from his forehead, in a long flowing style to his shoulders, wearing very form fitting black pants and shirt along with a sleek and intricately detailed coat that seemed to almost float around him in an unnatural way. He was very tall and Near placed his height at around 6'3.

However it was his eyes that truly struck Near. They were stark white with no pupils, Near could almost swear they were glowing with an ethereal white Light.

The man (whom Near was suspecting was far more than just that), strode toward the crowd in the warehouse ignoring everyone who was standing there and stopping a few feet away from Light, who looked at him and snarled while also seeming to shy away from the mysterious presence, and starting to babble even louder about being a god and how he didn’t want to die.

While his expression was difficult to read, Near could see that the man had a look of anguish and pity in his eyes as he stared at Light and before Near could say a word he turned on his heel and strode towards the Shinigami who was staring with utter horror at his shattered wings.

The man raised his palm face up with a curt gesture and Ryuk body flipped up into the air like a grotesque mannequin. The man beckoned his finger and Ryuk flew towards him, stopping a few inches from the man whose expression was now very easy to read. Rage filled the handsome countenance and if looks could kill Near had no doubt even a god of death would have been wiped from existence.

After staring at Ryuk for a minute, the man opened his mouth and said one word. “Explain”

The word itself dripped with raw power and command and Ryuk immediately started babbling incoherently although the few words that Near could make out were severely raising his interest, words like "Guardian", "Shinigami King", "ruined world", "promises" and "apologize".

The man snapped his fingers together and Ryuk's mouth slammed shut, his lips mumbling but seemingly unable to open his mouth. The man spoke again very quietly but each word clearly audible in the echoing warehouse “I didn't ask for apology or an incoherent stream of words. I want you to explain WHY you and the Shinigami King broke your word” his voice sharply rose in volume here and as he said it he sharply dropped his hand towards the floor and the Shinigami was thrown against the concrete with a sickening crunch.

Near who wasn't phased by much winced at the clear crack of breaking bones as Ryuk clutched his side in agony.

The man opened his fingers and Ryuk let out a whimper of pain. The man knelt down next to him and said “I’m waiting”

Ryuk who clearly was terrified started talking however, perhaps due to his clearly injured chest, his voice was very soft, and Near couldn't make anything beyond a light mumble.

Near noticed that the SPK and the Kira Task Force all were coming out of their shock at the events that just happened and Matsuda and Aizawa were lifting their guns, raising them slightly to cover the man and the Shinigami. Near had a very deep suspicion that no weapon would be able to affect whoever or whatever this man was.

Ryuk was actually crying now and after a few minutes of silence, the man raised himself from his kneeling position and faced the rest of the team in the warehouse. Ryuk suddenly started groveling, his hands and knees on the floor and his head bowed in supplication as he said “Please forgive me Guardian”. The man gave him a look of pure malice and swiped his hand through the air and Ryuk’s body flew across the warehouse and came to rest on the other side broken and crumpled.

As the man’s eyes locked on his, Near could sense something vast and deep in them, and even though they were pure white he felt like he was staring into the infinite cosmos.

Shaking himself free of the feeling of eternally flying into space, he asked the first thing that came to his mind.

“Who are you?”

The man gave him an appraising look and said “Well it depends on what you are enquiring. While I have many names, the one that most people address me with is more of a title then a name. I am called 'Guardian', however to the people who know me well, I am called “Kevin”.

Near blinked. He had no idea what to do with that so instead he asked “so may I call you Kevin?”

The Guardian lips raised slightly in a clear smile and said “Of course”

Near had so many questions however he suddenly realized that Light Yagami was still groaning on the floor in pain and he turned to Mogi and ordered him to call an ambulance so that they could stop Light from bleeding out. The last thing he needed was his ultimate prize to bleed out before he could face justice for his crimes.

“That won't be necessary “The Guardian told Mogi & Near. I will make sure that Light is healed shortly, He still has much to do, and I have no intention of letting that Shinigami prevent my plan from moving forward”

He raised his eyes toward the roof of the warehouse and gave a grim smile towards the heavens.

Near suddenly felt a shiver run down his spine. Was this man going to allow Light to become Kira again? As if to cement this theory the Guardian held out his hand and the Death note flew from Near’s hand into the Guardians.

Aizawa and Matsuda were clearly thinking the same thing because both of them raised their guns, pointing them directly at the Guardian and ordered him to return the death note back to Near. However they were clearly terrified, as their voices were trembling and Near wanted to roll his eyes. If their guns couldn't affect a Shinigami how on earth did they expect them to kill the thing that broke a Shinigami?

The Guardian raised his eye at Matsuda and Aizawa. “Please gentleman” he said in a clearly condescending tone, “put the guns down. There is no need for them and I would rather no one had to die here today.”

Matsuda and Aizawa stared incredulously at him, and Matsuda shouted in what he clearly thought was an intimidating voice, “Return the death note back to Near! If you don't, I WILL shoot!”

The Guardian let out a long suffering sigh, and raised his hand in the air. Matsuda, clearly panicking, let out multiple shots in the Guardians direction. The bullets did not pass through the Guardian, rather they simply ricocheted off his body in all directions, one of them hitting Mogi in the shoulder who dropped to the floor with a shout of pain, staring at the bullethole in his shoulder.

The Guardian gave a sigh and snapped his fingers and every gun in the warehouse suddenly evaporated into smoke and vanished.

As this was the least incredible thing Near has seen today he turned to the Guardian and said “I apologize for the interruption from our men” He gave a scathing look at Matsuda and Aizawa who were nervously backing away, “but why would you want to return Kira to his power? I would imagine a Guardian would want to prevent deaths, not ensure thousands more will happen. Also if Kira gets his hands on the death note he will immediately write our names into it, spelling the death of all us here.”

The Guardian looked at Near with an inscrutable expression.

”Do not assume to understand my plans or my goals youngling. What is happening here is far bigger than even you can comprehend. However if it makes you feel any better I give my word that none of your men will die today and that the being known as Kira will die instead.”

Near stared in surprise at the Guardian. “I don't understand you just said that you were going to heal him and that he has much to do. That doesn't sound like you plan on killing him.”

The Guardian’s mouth raised in a smirk “I never said I was healing Kira, I said I was healing Light, The two are extremely different.” He coughed, “well it's more like this will heal Light more than anything.” He slipped his hand into his coat and pulled out a pure white notebook.

Near stared at it. Clearly emblazoned on the cover were the words “Book of Life”.

The Guardian took the death note and placed it top of the Book of Life, and walked over to Light, stopping a few feet away from him. Dropping to his knees he lowered both books to the floor and looked intently at him.

“Light Yagami” he said, his voice radiating power and command again, “Do you agree to take up this book that lies in front of you and fulfill your purpose?”

Light who had been thrashing on the floor, turned towards the Guardian, an incredulous look on his face, Clearly very wary of the offer he croaked in a barely legible voice with blood dribbling from his mouth, “will I get to write whoever's names I want into it?”

The Guardian nodded and turned his head towards Near and “winked” at him.

Near, who was completely lost opened his mouth to protest when Light, who now had his horrific Kira grin plastered on his face gave a snarl of pure desire and hatred and started dragging his body, each move clearly agony, towards the books in front of him.

Near who would have nightmares for years from that expression, decided that he couldn't let this happen without at least trying to stop it. No matter what the Guardian said, he was a complete unknown, and Near was not going to allow even a chance of them all dying from coming to pass.

Considering his best move was to act while the Guardian was distracted he lunged towards the books to try and grab them. Hale and Giovani seeing Near act, also rushed the Guardian, hoping to distract him and give Near a chance. Moving faster than they could blink, the Guardian raised his hand palm out, and they all ran right into an invisible bubble bouncing back and landing painfully on the floor.

In retrospect Near would realize it could've been a lot worse. At least the bubble hadn't been hard. He would definitely have broken his nose.

Light crossed the last foot to the two notes and with a scream of triumph he grabbed them both and turned towards Near and his men, with a look that promised death and agony.

His expression changed to a puzzled one as he realized he was holding two books.

As he lifted them towards his face trying to make out what the other book was, there was a blinding flash of light from the books, and Light gave out a scream of raw agony as his body slowly lifted off the floor and started hovering about 10 feet off the ground, and clutching the notes in a death grip Light himself started glowing.


	2. Rebirth

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light is about to go through something monumental, but will he get through it intact? This chapter will be written from both Near's and Light's perspective. Enjoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much everyone for all the feedback. This chapter was incredibly hard to write due to all the emotion and feeling I tried to put into it but I hope I did my boys justice. There isn't a lot of Kevin in this one, but don't worry he is definitely going to play a major role in the upcoming chapters (although he does play a pretty monumental, albeit short part, in this chapter as well). As always comments & kudos are life and I hope you like this chapter as much as I enjoyed writing it.

As Near watched, Light started glowing brighter and brighter, his entire body seeming to shine with an otherworldly light. While it was clear the book was feeding this energy as Near could see the stream of light flowing from it, right into Light's body, there was something clearly happening within Light himself. 

As the light grew to almost blinding levels Near started to make out something in the depths of it, a deep darkness that seemed to almost be its own entity. The darkness started to grow rapidly, seeming to dim the light until Near realised that it was not dimming the light, but rather growing to counter it. 

As the two opposing forces grew they started to coalesce into shapes, and after a few seconds it became clear what they were becoming, both were forming images of Light.

While the white energy became a younger version with a grim smile on its face, the darker energy formed into what was clearly Kira. All the anger, hatred, malice and most clearly of all madness, evident on its features. 

The two energy beings lunged at each other simultaneously and started wrestling, obviously vying for dominance. Although they were unambiguously separate entities, they were both still rooted in the physical version of Light. 

Near, with difficulty, shifted his stare to the Guardian who was still kneeling also watching the proceedings above. As the darkness seemed to grow and start to overpower the Light, Near heard the man mutter a name - a name that was so achingly familiar, and filled Near with a palpable grief that he had learned to hide so well - “L Lawliet.” 

He was clearly speaking these words to Light because as he did the white energy flared in recognition, and Near could suddenly feel two profound emotions vibrating around him, a grief that ran even deeper than his own and a Love that seemed to burn brighter than the sun. 

Perhaps it was because he had been so close to L growing up but he seemed to be the only one besides the Guardian who noticed the feelings that hung in the air. 

It was probably just his imagination but Near could almost swear that he saw L’s outline hovering next to Light, but it was clearly just his mind playing tricks, because a second later the figure was gone. 

The white energy seemed to be drawing from the emotions, and started glowing brighter and brighter forcing the darkness back and then suddenly it started to envelope it, absorbing the darkness into itself. 

As this happened Light's mouth opened in a scream of agony, but as the light absorbed more and more of the darkness, the scream faded, and with a shudder Light started convulsing in mid air. 

Near watched in fascination as the bullets embedded inside Light oozed out his body, falling to the ground, his wounds closing in on themselves creating clear, unbroken skin. 

Mogi gasped and Near watched as the same thing happened to him, the bullet smoothly sliding out of his shoulder and the wound healing itself. 

************************************

Light felt like he was waking from a very long and horrible nightmare. The last thing he remembered was being in a helicopter with … someone? It was all so unclear and he couldn't remember where he was supposed to be. As he opened his eyes he could feel that something was wrong. For one thing opening his eyes didn't feel natural. One second they were closed and the next they were open. Secondly, wherever he was, it was not a natural place. After a few seconds he realised he was back in his & … - what was HIS name again - ‘s room He knew that whoever that person was, he had cared deeply for them,,maybe - no scratch that, he definitely loved them beyond anything he'd felt for someone before. 

Suddenly movement outside the window caught his eye and he stared as two titanic forces stormed and raged outside. He felt like the room should be shaking from this confrontation but nothing was happening. 

One of the forces, a bright white being of energy who looked exactly like him, just on a cosmic scale, was battling its twin, a dark force who also looked like him although the dark entity seemed to be winning. 

Light wasn't sure but he was almost certain that, should that dark force win, things were going to get very, very bad for him. The two beings took up the entire horizon, in fact besides for him, this room and the two struggling titans there seemed to be nothing else. 

Light felt that he should help the being of Light but he had no idea how. 

Out of the blue a voice that was nowhere and everywhere at once whispered a name, a name that snapped open his mind - ‘L Lawliet’. 

Suddenly a torrent of memories poured through him. Initially they were all ones he remembered being a part of himself. Meeting L the famous detective after he had locked him up in prison for fifty days. Coming to the headquarters and seeing this squat, strange person, whose eyes and mind tore through him, opening him up from the inside out as if he could see right into Light's soul. 

Light remembered being chained together, their friendship and connection growing stronger and stronger as time went on. Sleeping together in the same bed. Waking to find L snuggled up against him and feeling so in love and happy for the first time since he was a child. 

He and L going from friends to something more, and then on the night before the Yotsuba raid, holding L’s hands as they both fell asleep, knowing that he had finally found the one person who completed him in ways that one one else ever had, even though they had done nothing more then hold hands and sleep in each others arms. 

And then there was the fateful ride to arrest Higuchi before he could kill anyone else and grabbing the strange black book out of L’s hands and then… nothing. Except a feeling of loss so profound it brought him to his knees, tears streaming down his face. He had no idea where that came from. 

That and his love for L seemed to be the only things that took up his entire world, even blotting out the two titanic forces. 

However he could suddenly feel his connection to the white energy, and he could feel it drawing on his emotions becoming more and more powerful, before it started absorbing its dark twin. 

As it did so Light felt a fresh wave of memories coming through. Memories that felt like they weren't his and yet .... they were. 

He suddenly remembered holding the black book - the Death Note - staring at it in curiosity. He could also remember a faint creeping sensation almost as if something was leaking from the book into him. 

Writing down names inside to kill the wicked. A dark god, a Shinigami - ‘Ryuk’ - coming to him. His first chess moves with the police force and then - ‘L’. A cat and mouse game that began in earnest. Being followed by the FBI and then killing all of them using the Death note. Meeting Naomi Misora and tricking her into giving her name to him, and killing her. 

As these memories started flooding faster and faster into Light like an unwanted parasite he felt revulsion for them flood through his very being, the thought of killing so many people let alone innocent people, would have made him throw up if he had been in his physical form. 

He couldn't stop them however and as the darkness was absorbed further, more memories flooded through, Meeting L, truly for the first time, however here, instead of curiosity and attraction, there was nothing but coldness and calculation. A determination to kill L no matter what. Meeting Misa - both versions of him shuddered at this memory - and accepting her pledge to become his worshipping girlfriend. 

Misa being arrested and a desperate, brilliant, twisted gamble to clear his name.. 

And then his memories after the helicopter came back. The plot to force Rem to kill L and its successful execution. L, L dying in his hands as he gloated over his corpse. 

Light let out a scream of horror and anguish, pain tearing through him like nothing he had ever felt before. And yet the cursed memories wouldn't stop flooding in, faster and faster making him feel sicker and sicker. 

He remembered taking over as L while ranting like a madman over his grave. Moving in with Misa so he could use her eyes full time - again a dual shudder of revulsion - and finally another Cat and mouse game with L’s successor. N or Near or Nate Rivers? 

Sayu’s kidnapping and his father's death tore into him and he felt the pain of losing his father all over again except this time it was truly him who was mourning and not whatever corrupt - thing - had been inside him. 

The final moves between him and Near, and then the warehouse confrontation flooded into him last, as the remaining vestiges of the dark force were absorbed and the light took over the entire horizon. 

He could feel the bullets from Matsuda - ‘Matsuda you idiot’ - he subconsciously muttered, as Matsuda shot him, trying to write everyone's name down on his scrap of the death note, and then lying in the ground in agony from multiple bullet wounds, before finally a man, offering him back his Death note, and the last thing he remembered before waking up in here, grabbing what ended up being two books as they started glowing. 

All these memories were tainted with something dark and malignant. He knew that they were twisted by whatever had been inside him. These memories made him feel sick and nauseated, 

It felt like someone had given life to the deepest, darkest parts of his mind and that had taken over, transforming him into this monstrous and perverted version of himself. 

“Actually” a voice said from behind him - a voice that filled him with such ache and longing that, if he hadn't already been on the floor he would have fallen to it again - “That's a pretty spot on deduction. I'd expect nothing less”

Light slowly got up and turned around to see the impossible, L Lawliet was standing behind him. 

********************************

Near stared in disbelief as all of Lights wounds healed themselves, or rather he supposed judging by what the Guardian had said, it was The Book of Life that was healing him. By now the white energy had completely engulfed the dark and and with a surge it vanished into Lights body Light was still glowing however and Near noticed that his clothes, which had been torn and ripped from the bullets, seemed to be mending as well. Light's entire suit had changed color and was now bright white matching the energy that he still glowed with. 

Slowly the light faded from his body and Light drifted to the ground almost reminding Near of the famous transformation scene, at the end of one his favorite childhood movies Beauty and the Beast, where the beast slowly settles back down to the ground after transforming back into a man. 

Near could still make out Light's chest going up and down and he knew that he had survived, whatever process he had been put through. Everyone watched with bated breath to see what would happen and for a few minutes nothing did. 

*******************************

Light stared at L, his mind scrambled, not able to comprehend how he was standing there in front of him, and then, not caring one way or another, he threw himself into L’s arms hugging him so tight, he knew that if they were in the physical world L would be unable to breathe. As he hugged L he cried into his shoulder, with the ache and loss for the man he loved more than anything, the feelings even more profound now that he was here in front of him. 

He begged for L’s forgiveness, pleaded for mercy and understanding, and with a shudder of purest relief felt L put his arms around him as well, stroking his hair and whispering to him that it was all right and that he forgave Light for everything, 

Light carried on crying and holding L for what felt like hours before he managed to pull himself away and he held L’s head in his hands staring at him with total love and admiration. L’s grey eyes no longer had that dark shadow and instead were bright and even more vivacious then Light remembered in Life. Apparently the afterlife agreed with L. He gave a hiccuping laugh at the thought. 

He opened his mouth to ask L the one question he didn't even know how to ask, ‘How could you possibly forgive me for what i've done?’

L smiled at him and answered the question that Light had in his mind. “Because it wasn't you, my dearest Light. There was so much that was going on that you couldn't have comprehended and I only gained clarity on with my death, but you need to understand that everything you did as Kira was under the influence of force far beyond most mortals' understanding. 

Suddenly a look of urgency flashed across L’s face and he grabbed Lights head in his hands. 

“Listen very carefully to me, Light” he said. “We don't have much time left here and I can only speak to you while we are in this space. You are about to wake up. While you think you have absorbed everything that you have been through and done as Kira, that process will only truly begin when you wake up in your physical body. It's going to overwhelm you and hit you all at once, but there is someone there who will help you. There is so much i wish i had time to explain but he promised me that he will be there to help you through your transition and everything you will have to process.”

His grip on Light’s face grew stronger, “Promise me you will get through it Light! You are going to be put through emotions and feelings that no person should have to face and they are all going to hit you at the same time but you are one of the strongest people I know. Give yourself time to grieve and get through it.”

“I need you to survive Light Yagami” L retiratirated with a smile filled with longing, sadness and hope. “I am not done with you yet” 

Suddenly the room started fading along with L. Light panicked and tried to hold on for dear life to L as he faded from sight, L’s last words floating to him as everything vanished. 

“I'll see you soon Light Yagami” 

**************************************

As Light continued to lie there not moving, Near started going through random theories in his head, maybe Light had survived but his mind hadn't and he was now catatonic, maybe he was in a coma due to the trauma from the bullets, maybe he was… 

All of sudden Light eyes flew open glowing with a pale white light, he shot up to a sitting position staring at everyone around him, his eyes wild and unfocussed. 

As he seemed to settle down Near looked carefully at his face for some signs of Kira, but it was impossible to tell who had come out of that battle, even though it clearly looked like the energy from The Book of Life had won. Light's face didn't have the Kira look he had come to know so well, but neither was he smiling. 

And then Light raised his head to sky and gave a wail of anguish that was full of loss, pain and regret before he put his face in his hands and started crying, gut wrenching sobs of grief pouring out of him. 

In a move that surprised even Near, the Guardian gathered Light into his arms like a child and hugged him, as Light cried in his shoulder, clearly mourning a monumental loss.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whew well that was a lot of stuff for Light to get through and he still has a long journey ahead of him, now if only he had an all powerful being to help him along that journey 😉. In all seriousness though as powerful as Kevin is there's somethings that a person has to go though that not even a Guardian can cure.


	3. Explanations : Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light has finally woken up from his transformation and seems to be a reformed man, but is this actually the case, and how about all the questions that Near has?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know there's a lot of explaining done in this chapter, and i tried to do it in the most natural and narratively friendly way possible. There is actually still a whole other chapter where we will get into how Light ties into this whole Saga. This chapter almost wrote itself and I hope you all enjoy!

As Light continued crying into the Guardians shoulder Near wondered what this meant. ‘Was Light truly back, the Light that he had heard about through his conversations with Aizawa? It seemed that there had been a period where Light had been an innocent crusader of justice desperately seeking out Kira and who, if Aizawa had been correct, had formed a very close relationship with L’. 

‘Could this all be an act? Light had been known to be a phenomenal actor, I mean he had even fooled his entire team for years. Not that’, Near noted to himself sardonically, ‘it would have been too hard. None of them besides Light were the brightest bulbs in the chandelier. However it was clear that at least for a time even L had though Light could be innocent. Also what had changed Light Yagami back into Kira? No one seemed to know although the closest time frame seemed to be right before L’s death’. 

‘Apparently L had confided in Aizawa asking them shortly after they got back from the Yotsuba raid if they had noticed a change in Light. Aizawa had told Near that Light had definitely seemed a bit colder and his voice wasn’t as warm as it normally was, but they had all put that down to the stress of meeting the Shinigami for the first time’. 

‘What had changed then? The only thing that happened is… Light touched the Death Note! Could that have brought his Kira personality back? And why had no one else suddenly developed the Kira persona? After all at least three other people including L had touched that note book’. 

He had so many questions that needed answering including the most vital one of them all, ‘Was Light truly himself again. If he was still Kira then he still had the Death Note, and was a lethal threat to them all’. 

Near’s eyes flicked to the two books still clutched in Light's hands and frowned. No, there was only one book now... but The Book of Life had changed. Before it had been bright white but plain. A simple binding on a book. Now it was an elaborate tome with stunning artwork scrawling all along the facade, the beautiful artistry still growing and moving along the cover. 

Ok so maybe Light’s Death Note wasn't an issue now but Ryuk had, had one as well. He looked at the Shinigami who was still crumpled against the other side of the warehouse and saw his Death Note lying a few feet away from him. 

As he watched however Ryuk’s Death Note started disintegrating and the pieces of it flowed towards the book of Light and then were absorbed into the book itself. 

The questions just kept growing and Near knew that the one person, or being, who could answer all of them had Light cradled in his arms. As L watched the Guardians face, he saw again the pain and anguish he had seen earlier. It appeared that whatever had happened, the Guardian had his own regrets about it. 

Out of the corner of his eye Near noticed that Ryuk was crawling to his feet and very slowly sidling, sinking into the ground. Evidently he had decided that while the Guardian was distracted he could make his getaway, broken wings and all. 

Near had a feeling he wouldn't get very far and indeed, as he was about halfway into the ground, the Guardian lifted his hand off Lights back and snapped his fingers, and Ryuk suddenly stopped sinking, evidently stuck halfway into the ground. 

He shrieked in rage and pain, but the Guardian snapped his fingers once more, and Ryuks lips fused together, unable to make a sound. 

The Guardian rested his hand on Light's back again, who was still crying so hard he seemed to be unable to catch his breath. Indeed he was gasping for air and the Guardian seeing this waved his hands over Light’s eyes and Light instantly fell asleep, his cries of pain coming to a halt. 

The Guardian gestured his hand in the air in a generic way, and suddenly a couch appeared out of nowhere a few feet away, the kind that you always see in a therapist's office and that you just want to sink into and never get out of. Near shook his head, apparently he had a thing for comfy couches. 

The Guardian gently carried Light over to the couch like he weighed nothing and laid him down gently, moving his hair out of his eyes like a parent with a child. Even in his sleep Light was whimpering in pain and the Guardian sighed as he got up and faced everyone in the warehouse. 

For a minute no one said anything before the Guardian broke the silence. “So” he said,”I imagine you all have a lot of questions to ask about what just happened?” 

Everyone suddenly started asking questions at once and amid all the hubbub no one could hear anything being said. The Guardian raised his finger to his mouth and everyone immediately went quiet. Turning to Near the Guardian said “Considering you seem to be the leader of the group i will let you ask the first question.” 

Near didnt even need to think. He already knew what question he wanted to ask. “I guess the first question i would like to ask is, What happened here? I mean it's clear that you and Ryuk know each other, and there's that Book of Life which you just brought out, what is that and how does…”. The Guardian raised his hand in the air again and Near shut up. 

The Guardian gave a sigh and said “I think the only way for me to truly explain everything you just saw, and everything that will happen, is to start at the beginning. All the way from the beginning.” He waved his hand again and enough couches for everyone to sit on appeared, one in front of each person. “Well we might as well be comfortable during this explanation. It's going to be a long one”. Near noticed that his couch was his favorite kind, a comfy contemporary modern love seat with more than enough room for him to squat on. 

All the couches were facing towards each other, and they all sat down, the Guardian following them onto his one, which looked very similar to a grand throne. He started talking. 

“So as i'm sure you can all tell I’m not exactly your average man on the street”. He gave a self deprecating chuckle at this. “To tell the truth i've been around for a very, very long time. At this point I've lost count of how many years I've been around, but it would be at least a few hundred thousand years, possibly longer” Even Nears mouth fell open at this revelation. 

“How I gained the power I have is unimportant but when I got it, it changed me, made me evolve. As time went on I learned to use this power and even learnt how to make it grow, until I essentially became what people in this world would consider a God.” Near just kept his mouth open, it seemed easier. 

As time went on I learnt that there were other worlds out there, different planets, entire civilisations that were so exponentially advanced beyond where we are on this planet, even today, that i decided to start exploring. Our world was still in its infancy and I knew that I would not be needed here for a while. So I started travelling to different worlds and I realised very quickly how much I was needed”. He gave a long suffering exhale. 

“Unfortunately war and strife are not limited to Earth and I concluded without my help all these worlds would meet their end sooner or later, all that was needed was for one person on that planet to develop a weapon capable of wiping out all life, and inevitably someone always does, to destroy everyone on that world.” 

“I very quickly realized that I couldn't be an outright manipulator. Another common thing across worlds is that each values their independence and dont appreciate a God meddling in their affairs, especially one that looks so different to them, so I tried to meddle behind the scenes, and overtime I got better and better, however as good as I was I couldn't be everywhere at once and I came to the conclusion that I needed to come up with a solution so each world could be self sustaining but also have someone to ensure that nothing immensely life threatening came to pass on that world”.

He gave a wry smile. The solution I came up with was brilliant in its simplicity. I found one being on each world, who I knew could inherit great power, and could act as a Guardian for that world. I would still travel between worlds keeping an eye on the grand picture as it were, however that worlds Guardian would be its primary defender and I would only get involved in the rare case where things got so out of hand it would become intergalactic.”

“Of course finding these … people as it were, was no picnic. I needed to find someone who could essentially be immortal, living a life by themselves with few to none knowing of their existence. Someone who could handle immense power without being corrupted by it. And finally someone who was incredibly smart while also being kind and caring, someone who could apply their immense power in the wisest and most just way possible”. 

“It was hard, but finding these diamonds in the rough was some of the most rewarding work I've ever done and we are essentially a family now. All of us supporting each other”. 

His eyes went cold as he looked at Ryuk. “It was about ten thousand years ago” he continued,”I discovered a different plane of existence. A place that existed alongside our reality, with certain worlds coexisting alongside other worlds in our reality. This universe however was mostly a dead place with only one world of any note in it, one that happened to sit parallel to this world”, 

“This” he said, with a definite tone of sadness, “was the realm of the Shinigami”.  
“To understand what I am telling you. I would need to show you what the Shinigami realm looks like now.” He waved his hand in the air and a glowing light split the air and opened up into a screen of sorts although everyone was able to see it perfectly from their angle. 

The world that they saw in front of them was bleak and a nightmarish hellscape. Everything was dark and black and Near could see the bones and remains of giant creatures littering the landscape before them. Dust covered everything and as the view moved, Near could make out creatures dotting the landscape, each one unique in their grotesqueness. Some had eyes all over their bodies, some were skeletons, some were blobbs and others looked more like Ryuk, somewhat human, but a deformed parody of anything that even resembled one. 

“These being over here” the Guardian said, “are the Shinigami. Each one is unique and at this point there are not many left. At most a few thousand although I suspect it's less than a thousand at this point.” 

He waved his hand again and the vista flew by until they reached a glowing sphere of Light in the ground”. These are the portals with which they look into our world. As I know you are all very familiar with the Death Note at this point, I won't go into the details, but in case you don't know the Shinigami are essentially parasites. They steal lives from people in our world and use it to feed their own lifespan. Using their unique eyes they can see the life and names of any human they look at, and along with these portals it allows them to steal lives from any human that exists.” 

Near raised his hand, surprising even himself. “Yes?” the Guardian enquired.

“I have two questions I'd like to ask if that's ok” he said shrinking into himself at his boldness. 

“Of course” the Guardian replied. “What would you like to know?”

“Firstly”, Near asked, “I'd like to know if the Shinigami can steal lives from each other, and secondly” he continued” can they use the Death Note to steal your life or the life from other Guardians?”. 

The Guardian smiled broadly. “Those are excellent questions Near. The first answer is not so simple. Initially, yes, the Shinigami could use the Death Note to steal lives from each other. This started a war which shook their entire world and almost wiped them out of existence.It was only when there were less than a hundred thousand left that the Shinigami King-“

He waved his finger at them, “Your going to want to remember him, he plays a big role in what comes next.”

He continued, “-figured out that he could create rules in the original Death Note and they would be law. Thus he created a rule stating that no Shinigami may write the name of another Shinigami in their Death Note, or they would be wiped from existence. After a few tried to break this rule and were wiped out they, for very obvious reasons, stopped killing each other for their lifespans.” 

“As time went on however and their lives, which at this point ranged in the thousands of years for the surviving Shinigami, dragged on, the Shinigamis greatest fears was realised, for if they couldn't steal lives from each other where could they steal lives from?”

“It was at this point one Shinigami remembered that they had portals looking onto another world, a world which they had almost completely forgotten about.” After some quick experimentation it was discovered that human lives although far shorter than Shinigami lives could easily be used to supplement their own lives” 

The Guardian gave a dark smile in Ryuk’s direction, “However there was a catch that none of them realised till it was too late. Stealing the lives of other beings was like transplanting tissue that is incompatible with your body.” The Guardians dark smile grew even grimmer. “The Shinigami started to rot from the inside out, their organs petrifying and although they were technically alive they were essentially living petrified lives. The rot spread into their world and infected it, as the Shinigami were incredibly attuned to their world” This is a part of why the Shinigami world looks like it does today”. 

“Due to this corruption a lot of Shinigami gave up hope and stopped writing human names into the Death Note, preferring Death to the rot that was overtaking them. Only the strongest willed Shinigami had the strength to keep their unnatural lives going, although even they started giving up which is why you have so few of them left today”. 

The Guardian suddenly turned to Near, “I apologise, i went a bit off topic there, although it is very relevant to what i will explain as we carry on.” 

“As for your second question” he said, “That one is simple, Myself and my fellow Guardians are far too powerful to be killed by a Death Note, so no, it could not kill us.”

“Now” he continued, “In order to truly understand what happened today with Light I need to take you back, ten thousand years ago, to when I discovered the Shinigami world. It was a very different place back then, and it makes what I just showed you even more horrifying and tragic.

He waved his hand and the scene changed once more, and Near’s jaw dropped again, for instead of a dark and corrupted world he was looking at Paradise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So that explains much, but there's still so much that's yet to be explained. I will be hopefully answer most of your remaining questions in the next chapter. As always comments and kudos are life! Thanks to everyone whos given me feedback so far. I will always respond as soon as I can.


	4. Explanations : Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Near is slowly putting the pieces together, but he still has so many questions, not the least of which is how does Light tie into all this? Will the Guardian answer all his remaining questions, and what happened to the Shinigami world that changed it so much?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So one more exposition dump to go before we get back to Light and his true role in all this. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Paradise seemed to be the best description for the plateau that was laid out before them. Where before there had been dust and wastelands, there was now magnificent greenery, spread out as far as the eye could see. Massive creatures roamed the area, each one as stunning as it was unique. Vibrant colors and lithe shapes were all around them and they all seemed peaceful as they walked through the verdant green fields. 

Near suddenly saw what could only be described as an angel fly through the air in front of them. It’s magnificent wings were as broad as they were beautiful and they shimmered in an opalescent grace that was ethereal. 

As the Angel flew past Near could see that there were hundreds flying around. None seemed to be in a hurry and all of them were stunning and unique. A commonality seemed to be that they were all thin and lithe, they were all tall, at least 7 foot or more and they all wore fitted and intricately detailed clothing, evidently so as to not hinder them in their flight. 

As the view shifted the landscape started flying past, magnificent trees hundreds of feet high, each bearing loads of fruit that Near had never seen before, although one tree carried what Near could swear were apples. 

As the view crested an enormous mountain, Near gasped in wonder. An enormous city lay sheltered in a valley. It was easily the biggest city he’d ever seen, and that included cities like New York and London. It sprawled across hundreds of miles, each building a work of art, some of them climbing hundreds of feet in the air, in impossible angles and shapes defying the laws of gravity.

Towards the center of the city was a massive tower, taller than any of the others, at whose peak, a bright light shone with almost blinding brilliance. 

“That” the Guardian said, “is Lorathal ‘Cordier or as it is known in the human world, the Silver City.” 

“Wait a minute” Matsuda exclaimed, “Are you saying that we are looking at Heaven right now?” 

“Indeed” The Guardian replied, “This is the Heaven that most Humans think of when they read the Bible or consider the afterlife. This however is not really Heaven. The truth is some humans for one reason or another were able to see through the portals that the Shinigami use and see into ‘Heaven’ as it were. Of course this is where you would get the classic myth of the Angel due to the creatures you see in front of you, although some of them would come down to earth every now and then, and this further helped spread the popularity of Angels.”

Aizawa looked sharply at the Guardian. “In that case what happened to these Angels and how did this world come to ruin?”

“Patience” the Guardian replied. “All will be answered shortly. Before we go there we need to visit one more place.” The view shifted again flying rapidly across the city till they came to the impossibly tall tower that was towering over the entire city. 

As they moved into the topmost room the bright light dimmed a little and they entered a magnificent throne room. Completely open on all sides with a single towering throne at the end. Sitting on the throne was an Angel like none other. He was easily ten feet tall, his beauty was so striking it bordered on the impossible, and four colossal wings spread out from his back each one spread out with colors beyond the imagination. And next to him, on a pedestal, was a very familiar book. 

‘The Book of Life’. 

“This was the ruler of this realm”, the Guardian explained. “He was a kind and benevolent leader who governed this world with justice and fairness. Thanks to The Book of Life, he was essentially immortal and ruled with his immortal Queen beside him.” 

Near noticed that there was some marking on the floor on the side of the throne as if another throne had been there a long time ago. 

“Now while they were immortal the rest of the ‘Angels’ for lack of a better word were not, although each one had a lifespan of thousands of human years. “Together the King and Queen ruled over these Angels for countless years, until one day in an unprecedented move one of the Angels struck down the Queen using the very book that had been used to help keep balance and peace in the world.” 

The Guardians face darkened as he continued. “The King in his fury used the book to strike down the Angel who killed his immortal Bride and this was seen by all as justice due to the heinousness of the crime. However due to the King using the book purely out of Anger and not Justice the book started rejecting the King. It wouldn't work for him the way it used to and instead of trying to make things right, the King tried to dominate the Book into submission.”

“It was around this time before the corruption began that I discovered this world and met the King.” Near saw the Guardian walk into the room and greet the King.  
“We spoke for a very long time, I explained who I was and after hearing his horrific story I tried to help him. Unfortunately it was too late, although i couldn't see it at the time.” 

Near suddenly saw another Angel walking into the room and introducing himself. While nowhere near as beautiful as the King he was still as dazzling and graceful as the other Angels. He was munching enthusiastically on one of the ‘Apple like’ fruits and as he went to stand next to the king, Near had a niggling feeling that he looked familiar, although that was impossible as he had never met an Angel before. 

The view changed again and now they were looking down on the city and the surrounding landscape from hundred of miles above and Near noticed something immediately. Whereas before there had been paradise certain areas were starting to fade, the greenery evidently dying and in the city itself, certain buildings were starting to take on a worn look. 

“What you see before you is the gradual corruption of this paradise”, the Guardian continued. “It started very slowly, but as the King thrust his will more and more on the Book the land itself started reflecting this.” 

They were once again in the throne room and this time the King was holding the Book of Life in front of him. He was nowhere near as majestic now. The feathers were starting to fall off his wings and seemed to have shrunk a few feet. The King slowly tore a page out of The Book of Life and immediately it formed into a small book with a very familiar black cover. He gave this to the Angel standing next to him. 

All of a sudden a lot of things clicked into place for Near, however he decided to wait and see if the Guardian verified his theories. 

“In the King's loneliness he decided that he would be immortal by himself no longer and he tore out pages from the notebook and gave one of each to all his most loyal subjects, each page as you can see here, formed into what I'm sure you recognised as a Death Note. This was the true death of this world. The Book of Life slowly began to corrupt and as it was the center of this world, the world started corrupting with it. Especially its original keeper. It is also what started the war I mentioned earlier, where Shinigami were using their Death Notes to steal each others lives.” 

The Guardian turned to Aizawa. “To answer your question Aizawa, the Angels were the original form of the Shinigami. Each of them in their quest to become immortal, twisted and deformed into the horrific creatures I showed you a while ago.” 

Near raised his hand, “The Angel we saw next to the King earlier, he was Ryuk right?” 

The Guardian chuckled. “I had a feeling you would spot that. Yes indeed he was the King's right hand Angel.”

The view had zoomed out again and Near watched as the years went by at incredible speed, and the land died, and the Angels became the Shinigami while all life around them fell into dust. 

“I watched in horror during my visits as their world died around them. I even tried to intervene with their King but he refused to listen to me and as his subjects were still utterly devoted to him so I couldn't do anything without starting a war and making things even worse.” 

“Our story continues about three hundred years ago, at the start of the Age of Enlightenment. I knew that humanity had reached its tipping point, to where it would start the massive evolution forward in thought, mindset and most importantly technology. What had been stagnant for hundreds of years would now change at a blistering pace and I knew that my home world would need its Guardian as soon as possible. Due to this being my home planet my powers are amplified here and i wasn't just limited to the current timeline, i could look for the ideal Guardian throughout time.” 

I was starting to despair as no one for the next three hundred years fit the bill of what was needed to be the ideal guardian until I suddenly found him.”

“Let me guess,” Near said dryly. “It was Light Yagami.” 

The Guardian gave another small smile. “Correct again Near.” 

“But that makes no sense” Aizawa responded angrily. “Light became a monster, he slaughtered hundreds of thousands of people. I mean you saw what he became.” 

The Guardian gave a cool look at Aizawa who shut up immediately. “I would ask you to hold your tongue Aizawa, until I explain everything.”

He turned back to everyone else “I had one large problem, I needed a source of power for Light, something he could use to help him watch over this world and give him his immortality. As I'm sure you are all aware, our world is not swimming in magic and the anomaly that gave me my power was the last one of any decent strength that had existed in our world.”

“As I was thinking I had an idea. The Book of Life was a source of power that would be perfect for Light, and I had the ultimate bargaining chip”. The view changed again to the now ruined Silver City, the only building left standing was the Kings tower although it looked ruined and twisted like the rest of the landscape. 

As the view shifted again they watched the Guardian walk into the Throne room and they all stared in horror at the King of the now, Shinigami. His body was nothing more than a bloated mass with a skull, suspended by chains, and his wings were nothing more than stubbly arms with three claws each. 

Standing next to him was Ryuk. 

“I made a deal with Shinigami King”, The Guardian continued. “I explained that in three hundred years a boy by the name of Light Yagami would be born. The deal was that the King would have Ryuk deliver The Book of Life to him when he was twenty three years old, old enough for him to be mature enough to handle the enormous responsibility of its power, and I knew that at that point i would be able to come back to Earth and instruct him on how to use it and explain everything to him”. 

“In return I would help the Shinigami King restore his world to its original glory. I knew of a source of power I could borrow to aid in this, and The Book of Life was useless to the Shinigami King now as it had rejected him so completely due to the evils he had committed with it.”

“But this never happened,” the Guardian said, giving a look of unadulterated anger at Ryuk who was still struggling, sunk halfway into the warehouse floor. “Instead of delivering The Book of Life to Light, the Shinigami King decided to deliver his original Death Note which had formed when he tore out the Death section of The Book of Life, becoming the ultimate Death note. He knew that this would have an incredibly corrupting influence on Light Yagami”. 

The Guardian expression grew even darker. “Not even he however could predict the level of influence it would have. You see, the Original Death Note is almost as powerful on its own as it The Book of Life is. However separated from its other half it became a force of corruption no human could resist. The corruption is so swift and mind twisting that any person who touches it goes insane almost overnight. The few times the Shinigami King had dropped it to Earth to see what would happen, the human who found it would immediately start writing down the name of everyone if their area, however they would typically go insane within 24 hours of holding the Death Note and couldn't even write down any more names rendering them useless to the Shinigami King. 

While the Guardian was talking the view had changed and they saw a man in medieval clothing pick up the Death Note. They watched as everything Guardian spoke of came to pass and by the end the man's entire town was dead around him and the man himself was lying on the floor gibbering away in madness, his eyes rolling in his head.

“The fact that Light was able to withstand the total corruption for so long, is a testament to my choice. Only a completely unique individual of incredible kindness and intelligence with that certain X factor that only guardians possess, could withstand the corruption of the original Death Note for as many years as he did.”

“Unfortunately” the Guardian sighed, “Not even he could resist its call forever. It was however only when he succeeded in killing his soulmate L Lawliet that the corruption truly started taking over”. 

Everyone in the warehouse started at this. “Soulmates” Near scoffed. “There’s no such thing, and even if there were, L would never have one. He was far above such things as soulmates”. 

The Guardian raised an eyebrow at Near. “Really? You've seen Shinigami’s, Death Notes, Angels, magic and even me and yet you draw the line at Soulmates?” 

Near didnt know what to say. 

“Indeed, they were soulmates. During the time where Light lost his memories and the corruption from the Death Note had been suppressed, Light Yagami and L Lawliet fell deeply and unconditionally in love. Although judging by your expressions none of you realised it”. He looked at Aizawa, Matsuda and Mogi. 

“Anyway it was when he touched the Notebook and regained all his lost memories of being Kira that everything came back full force, including the all powerful corruption. This is why I do not blame Light Yagami for things he did after first touching the Death Note. No human could have resisted that, and he was never meant to.”

The Guardians voice rose in anger. “He was supposed to receive The Book of Life and he was supposed to have gotten it this year when he could handle it, and I could help him. Instead he was given its polar opposite at the tender age of seventeen”. 

“From what Ryuk tells me the Shinigami King ordered him to break the deal and deliver the death note to him early so it could cause massive amounts of chaos and death in our world before I could come to fix it”.

The Guardians face took on its earlier expressions of grief and sadness. “I don't know why I never thought to take into account that the Shinigami King would betray me. It doesn't make sense. I was literally offering to restore his world to the paradise it used to be, including himself. Thanks to my arrogance, hundreds of thousands died in this world and the Guardian who was supposed to protect it was almost corrupted and destroyed beyond repair”

“Well that's not completely fair on you” Matsuda said placatingly. :”I mean from everything you told us there was no way for you to know he would double cross you like this”. 

“Perhaps not” The Guardian said, a sad smile on his face. I am powerful but I am not omniscient or omnipresent, however there's no getting around one simple fact. Without me the Shinigami King would never have known about Light and his potential. Ultimately it's thanks to me that all this happened”. 

His voice changed and became more determined. “Unfortunately what happened, happened and there's no going back to change it. The only thing we can do now is move forward”, 

He looked at Light's body lying a few feet away and got up. 

“It's time for Light Yagami to become this world's Guardian”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this hopefully answers most of the question out there regarding Light and his role in all this. I know there are still a few unanswered questions and i will try address them ASAP. I also really wanted to cover my theory as to what happened to the Shinigami world and how it became the devastation we see in the anime. I hope i tied it well into the story.  
> As always kudos and feedback are much appreciated! 😉


	5. Awakening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's now time for Light to awaken, however while he may be a Guardian in name, he still has a long way to go before he can truly take on that responsibility, and much guilt to deal with. Fortunately he has Kevin on his side. And Kevin is not above cheating to help things along! 😉

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for the wait. Work has been crazy and the more i write the more I respect all the other writers who do this purely for the love of it in their free time. Your all amazing and my inspiration. I hope you enjoy this next chapter.

As the Guardian moved towards Light, Near realised there were still some important questions that needed answering, however now did not seem to be the right time to interfere as the Guardian was clearly focused on Light exclusively. . 

Turning to the rest of the team he said “Now I’m going to slowly wake him up and try and bring him back to reality. While I'm doing this things are going to get very weird, as I'm going to try and do something I haven't done in a very long time. I'm going to create a time dilation around myself and Light. I have a lot to explain to him and there is much that he needs to absorb, and not much time for him to do it.”

He turned and gave a hard look at everyone in the warehouse. “This is a particularly tricky procedure and if i'm interrupted can go disastrously wrong for everyone in here. If anyone interferes with this or disturbs me while I'm waking up Light, I will be extremely angry and you do NOT want to get me angry.” 

Everyone gulped, especially Aizawa, whom the Guardian seemed to be focusing on. 

“Now while only about half an hour will pass over here, weeks will go by inside there. Hopefully when we come out Light will have had time to grieve and process everything that happened in the last few years.” 

Matsuda raised his hand. “I'm sorry but there's something I don't understand, If Light is Kira why does he need time to process everything that happened, I mean wasn't he there for all of it?”

The Guardian gave an exasperated glance at Near before turning back to Matsuda. “If you were listening when i was talking earlier i explained that Kira took over Light completely after L Lawliet’s death. I wasn't exaggerating or speaking in hyperbole. Kira as an entity took over Light in every way, subsuming every part of Light that made him who he was, and feeding off of the fear and hate that exists in all of us.” 

“When Light woke up a while ago. everything that had happened in the last few years since he picked up the notebook, except for the period where he gave it up, suddenly hit him all at once.” 

“Can you imagine”, the Guardian asked Matsuda, although he seemed to be addressing everyone in the warehouse, “If someone had killed hundreds of thousands of people using your body, someone who felt like you and whose memories were all crammed into your head in the space of a few seconds?”

Matsuda shivered, “I'd probably go insane or something”, he muttered. 

“Exactly” the Guardian said. “Before I put him to sleep, Light was trying to process all those murders as well as the death of his father as well as the fact that he had killed the love of his life on top of everything else. That is why I need to help him get over this and some things cannot be healed except with time, and time is not on my side.” 

“Speaking of which”, he pulled an intricate, golden disc from out of thin air and left it hovering in place. The disc started glowing and then the face of a vaguely humanoid figure appeared in its depths”. 

“What's the status of things on Veldheer, Kerebor?” the Guardian said to the person inside the disc. 

As he spoke Kerebor’s voice was crisp and clear but also distant at the same time. “The Eldar are on the move, My Lord. While I can't speak for their Leaders the actual infantry are reluctant to fight, but if you don't come soon I can't guarantee that I can stop an all out war from breaking out with Eldien”. 

The Guardian swore and he replied in an angry tone, “Warn whoever the leader is that if a war breaks out before I get there I will personally hold them responsible for this debacle. I can't believe this is happening right as I'm desperately needed on my home world.” he said, clearly very exasperated. 

He gave a sharp look at the disc. “Did they give any indication how long it will be before they attack?”. 

Kerabor's reply was melancholy, “We have at most three universal time slots before they will attack. I’m worried that the only thing they fear enough to call it off is yourself. I threatened to pass judgement on the entire pantheon if they moved ahead with the war, but they definitely have help from an outside force. Someone is manipulating things behind the scenes, I'm almost certain of it.” 

The Guardian expression grew hard. “I have a suspicion who it might be, but i can't be certain until i get there. I gather you felt their energy at the temple?”

Kerebor nodded. “Alright,'' the Guardian replied. “Keep things as peaceful as possible till I arrive. I cannot leave Earth yet until I have rectified things here. Report to me if anything goes awry.” 

Kerebor’s raised his hand in a universal sign of salute and his image vanished followed by the disc. 

The Guardian looked around at everyone who was staring at him. 

“What?”

“Ummm what was all that about?” Matsuda enquired, speaking for everyone. 

The Guardian chuckled. “I apologise. I sometimes forget how little people know here about intergalactic affairs. "That” he said “was Kerebor, one of the Guardians I created. He is situated on a world called Veldheer, a world that is extremely advanced both in science and magic. Unfortunately they are also very aggressive beings by nature and they were at war with another planet called Eldien for thousands of Earth years.” 

He shifted his stance before continuing. “A few thousand years ago, I helped broker a peace treaty between them, and thankfully between myself and their Guardian, have managed to keep it going since then.” 

His expression darkened. “Unfortunately recently, a very powerful group of magic users called the Eldar rose up and took over the planet. They did it completely legally so I was unable to stop them, however they are intent on finishing the war with Eldier once and for all. Their leader is an unknown but he is charismatic and even though he hides his face, his words and his power have garnered him enough support, where he apparently feels safe enough to break the treaty.” 

“This is why i cannot stay for long. This is only one of the issues i have to deal with, albeit definitely the most pressing.” 

“And who is this being you suspect of manipulating things behind the scenes?” Near enquired

The Guardian shook his head. “Even if I knew for sure, which I don't, I wouldn't be able to tell you. It would require far too much time to explain all the history needed to understand what he is, but suffice it to say he and I have been playing a very long, very drawn out game of cat and mouse. Almost like our Light and L” he said looking fondly at Light, who was still asleep on the couch. 

He shook his head. “Enough talking. I'm going to create the time dilation and wake up Light. Remember what I said, Any interruptions could not only be catastrophic to anyone in the vicinity but also fatal.” 

He knelt next to Light and raised his hand palm up, a small, almost invisible bubble formed inside and rapidly grew to encompass him as well as Light. Immediately their outlines became very blurry and the bubble became almost completely opaque, and Near could no longer make out anything happening inside.

********************************************

Light slowly awoke from a world of nightmares, nightmares in which he was a mass murderer, had killed his true love and had been inadvertently responsible for the death of his father. 

As he opened his eyes the realisation that this was no nightmare, and that he had indeed done everything he had been dreaming about, crashed all over him and he felt his throat seize up with grief and anguish. Suddenly he felt two hands grasp him on either side of his head and he looked up into the face of one of the most beautiful men he had ever seen. Of course no one was as beautiful as his L but he was a close second. 

He looked into eyes that were stark white glowing with a bright light and he fell into their depths, feeling like he was sinking into a comforting pool of water that cradled him and shielded him from his grief. 

“Hello Light Yagami” the voice of the man said. “My name is Kevin”. Light blinked, almost startled out of the hypnotic gaze of the man before him at the mundanity of such a name, for such a person. 

Kevin smiled at him. “I know, it's not a very profound name but it is my real name and as we are going to get to know each other very well over the next few millennia, I feel it's important to get off on the right foot”. 

Light had no idea what to say. Millennia? What was this man talking about? Suddenly he remembered what L had told him, that there would be someone waiting for him, who would help him with everything that had happened. He looked deeper into Kevin’s eyes. 

“You're him aren't you!” He exclaimed. “The one L told me would be waiting for me when I woke up”. 

Kevin smiled and nodded. “Indeed I am. He is an exceptional soul and a wonderful person. It was an honor to meet him”.

Light shivered. “How did you meet him? I mean he’s dead. I killed him!” He felt the calm breaking and all the guilt and horror started crashing over him again. Kevin grabbed him by the head again, his grip unrelentingly strong and firm and yet he did not hurt Light. He forced Light to look into his eyes until he had calmed again. 

“Indeed he is dead”, Kevin explained. “Luckily I am quite easily able to communicate with the dead, and when I came to find you one of the first things I saw was his Soul hovering by your bullet ridden body. It’s been a long time since I saw two souls so bonded together like that”. 

Light would have cried if he hadn't been deep in Kevin’s thrall. “I have no Soul,” he said. “I am a mass murderer, a monster who needs to be put down for the good of humanity”. The guilt and pain was hovering just out of sight, waiting to crash down on him as soon as Kevin released him from his thrall. 

Kevin sighed. “Oh Light”, he said, “you are not the monster. There are monsters at play here, but you are most certainly not one of them”.  
He held out his hand. “As L said there was so much that was happening that you need to be aware of. And while it wont take away all the guilt, I think it will help a lot. Would you take my hand and I will show you everything you need to know?”

He blinked sadly. “I hope that after everything I show you, you don't hate me as much as I deserve”. 

Not sure what to think about that, Light took his hand and suddenly he was in Kevin's mind. He could feel his emotions and see his memories. He watched as Kevin explained everything to Near and his task force. In accelerated speed, yet grasping every detail. He watched the whole timeline from the time Kevin became the first Guardian, the creation of the Guardian corps, the entire Shinigami story and finally his role in everything, to all the events that happened in the warehouse while he had been asleep”. 

He gave a cry as all this new information swept over him, almost overwhelming his mind. 

****************************************

Near stared at the opaque bubble surrounding the Guardian and Light. He kept thinking about everything the Guardian had said and how Light was innocent because of everything he had been through. While Near understood this on a practical level, on another level it irked him. 

As far as he was concerned, conscious of his actions or not Light Yagami was responsible for everything Kira had done, for in picking up the notebook he had allowed this great evil into the world. Light Yagami is Kira and Kira is Light Yagami and Near was determined to win this game once and for all, and you didn't win the game by letting your enemy get away scott free. 

However he had two problems and both of them were immensely powerful and sitting in a time bubble. He somehow needed to get The Book of Life away from Light Yagami and he could only do it once the Guardian left. He knew the Guardian would stop him and he had no way to respond to that. Nonetheless, from everything he could see, Light Yagami was nothing without The Book of Life, so it was just a matter of waiting. 

He would need an ally. Someone who hated Light and Kira and wanted to see him face justice. He gave a sly glance at Aizawa, who was glaring at the time bubble. He had a feeling that he knew exactly who to turn to. 

Near glanced at his watch. Only one minute had passed. He needed to plan things right now while the Guardian was distracted. 

*****************************************

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I kinda hadn't planned for Near to go in that direction but i'm rewatching the Anime and after watching him for a few episodes it just feels right that he wouldn't let Light 'get away' with being 'Kira', even with everything the Guardian has shown him. I will reveal more of his plan in the next chapter which i'm already part way through. As always feedback and kudos are life.


	6. Revelations : Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As Light is still processing everything he's done with Kevin's help, Near is plotting to make sure Light will pay for his sins. However Light still has much to work through before he's ready to face the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry again for another long wait. It's a lot easier to type when work isn't in the way lol. Hope y'all enjoy this chapter.

Light didnt know what to think, or say or even do. Everything that had happened to him had been pre-planned. From the Death Note being delivered to him, to him being chosen as a Guardian, whatever that meant, over three hundred years before he was born. It was all too much information and yet Light was grateful, for it helped distract him from all the horrific memories that kept threatening to overwhelm him. 

“I don't understand something”, he said, saying the first question that came out of the jumble in his brain. “Ryuk told me, no - he told Kira, that I was not chosen to receive the Death Note but rather I just happened to pick it up”. 

“He lied”. 

Light blinked. “But he dropped it randomly and it fell out onto the courtyard while I wasn't even there. Anyone could have picked it up”. 

The Guardian gave a grim smile. “It's good to see you are as intelligent as I foresaw you being Light. Here let me show you what really happened. I kind of ripped this memory from Ryuk’s mind while i was interrogating him”. He rested his hand on Light forehead and Light was in another memory”. 

He was back in the Shinigami Kings throne room, the King as hideous as ever, and he watched as the King turned to Ryuk. 

“The boy Light is almost at his seventeenth year on Earth,'' he said. “I have been watching him and he is starting to ponder about the world being rotten and full of evil people, just like i anticipated at this age. It is time to deliver the Death Note to him”. 

Ryuk seemed to be very nervous. “Are you sure about this, my King?” he said, licking his lips. “The Guardian gave us very clear instructions and I have heard nasty stories of Shinigami who have gotten on his bad side before.” 

The King gave a baleful stare at Ryuk. :”Are you questioning my judgement, Servant? he said, his voice low and dangerous. The next moment his expression lightened. “Just remember Ryuk once this ‘Light’ becomes a god of death on his world, we can move forward with my plans”. The King rubbed his grotesque hands together, an evil grin on his face. “By the time the Guardian gets back he will be too late and I will be too powerful for him to stop.”

He raised one of his claws over the Death note and drew a rune in mid air, which settled on the Death Note and vanished. “There,” he said with a satisfied tone. “Now only Light Yagami will be able to see, or even touch the Death Note until he picks it up. And that's all we need my loyal servant. Once he touches the Death Note, the corruption will take hold and we can leave it to do the rest.” 

He handed the Death Note to Ryuk, and Light watched as Ryuk flew to one of the portals and dropped it down into the human world. He observed as his younger self came out of the classroom and bent down to pick up the Death note, when the image froze. 

He looked at the Guardian confused. “At this point” the Guardian said, “I think we should move in a little closer to see exactly what happened”. The view shifted and all of a sudden they were standing next to his younger self. - Light looked with a pang of regret at how innocent he looked there, and yet that was all about to change. 

“I want you to look carefully now, what happens as you pick up the Death Note”, Kevin explained. It's not something you would have been able to see before, but as you are now attuned to The Book of Life, you should easily be able to see it. 

Light watched as in slow motion his younger self bent down and picked up the Death Note. Immediately he saw it. Something blacker than night, and slicker than an oil spill seeped from the Death Note into him. It happened almost instantly and Light recalled with a shudder the faint creeping sensation he had felt when first picking up the Death Note. He now knew exactly what happened at that moment. 

“Is that it?” he asked the Guardian. “Is that the corruption they were talking about earlier?

“Mmhmm” Kevin replied. “That is exactly the same corruption that took over that poor peasant we saw earlier and drove him mad almost overnight. It seeped into your consciousness without you realizing it, hibernating there, growing stronger and stronger as time went on. It was only due to your immense inner strength of will and mind that you didn't go insane as quickly as the previous person who touched it”.

“However it was still subject to the laws of the Death Note and even though it was buried in your mind, when you gave up the Death Note it had to go into total hibernation, unable to do anything until you regained the Death Note. It was a sacrifice it was willing to make for it knew that when you regained the Death Note, its hold on you would come back stronger and more powerful than ever before”. 

Light stared at the Guardian. “You talk about it as if it's a living thing”, he said. “Is that possible?”

“Indeed it is. Remember The Book of Life from which it originally came is an incredibly powerful artifact, and had a will and mind completely its own. That was why it was able to reject the Shinigami King when he killed his wife's murderer out of anger.”

“Of course”, Kevin continued, “when he tore out the original Death Note, it gained its own twisted sentience. Separated from the Life aspect of the Book it became a force of twisted corruption, destroying any mortal who held it. It even corrupted immortals, that is why the Shinigami King looks as twisted as he does, for he was its bearer for all those millennia.” 

Light looked at his body. “So why don't I look like that?” he asked. “After all I'm nowhere near as powerful as the King. Oh and before I forget” he continued “Lots of people touched the Death Note, including myself, and the entire Kira Task Force. Surely we all should have been subject to the same corruption. And what about the other Death Notes, why do they not have a similar corrupting influence on their users?” 

Kevin chuckled, which Light found mildly inappropriate considering the seriousness of the topic they were discussing. 

“Ah Light” he said, “your mind never stops working and that makes me very happy. To answer your first question, the physical corruption takes much longer to come about then the mental corruption. If it's any consolation, your mind would have broken long before your body did”. 

It was not. 

“As for the second question. It’s fairly simple. The corruption was tied to the Death Note but you only needed to touch it once, and the corruption was inside you and no longer in the Death Note. And yes all Death Notes do have a very mild form of this corruption as part of their makeup. Ryuk wasn't lying when he said owners of Death Notes lead lives of misery and suffering. However, that perversion is nowhere near as profound as the original corruption. As the Kira Task Force and Near only held the Death Notes for short periods, the corruption from them would have been nominal at best”. 

“Of course”, he said rufelly, “People like Misa Amane and Teru Mikami who held the Death Notes for long periods, as well as used them frequently, had much more severe effects, although nowhere near as profound as yours obviously. Misa’s was less then any of yours due to the fact that she had given up her memories a few times forcing any corruption in her to go into full hibernation. Which compared to your corruption was nothing. I mean” Kevin said, “you were talking about becoming a god almost as soon as you..." 

Kevin paused and a look of puzzlement came over his face. He stood up and started pacing. “Was that why he did it?” he mused, “Could that really have been his plan?” Light recognized that look. It was the look that came over L’s face anytime he was trying to figure something out. He shoved the thought down. Thinking of L was still far too painful. 

Light looked down at The Book of Life in his hand. As he watched streams of energy seemed to be flowing into the book and the book was becoming thicker and glowing brighter as this happened. 

He turned to ask Kevin what was happening and quickly changed his mind as a thunderous expression crossed Kevin’s face. “No surely not”, Kevin was muttering furiously now. “Not even he would be so stupid as to try that, Of course if he was successful…” He whirled in place and strode over to Light. “May I hold The Book of Life please Light” he said, his tone at complete odds with the expression on his face. 

Light nodded and handed the book over to Kevin who took it reverently. He held it for a few seconds before sighing and handing it back to Light. “It's no good’ he said. “I won't be able to get the information I need until it's complete”. 

This seemed to be an ideal point for Light to ask his question. “Is that what the streams of energy that are coming into the book are about?”

The Guardian looked at him with a bemused expression. “Wait you can actually see those?” 

Light nodded. 

Kevin gave a shout of triumph and looked at Light with a big smile on his face. “Excellent. It looks like I chose even better than I thought. Only someone who is innately attuned to The Book of Life could see what's happening here.” 

“What you are seeing, he explained, “are the Death Notes from all the Shinigami returning back to their source. Now that the original corruption has been reunited with The Book of Life along with a Death Note, The Book of Life is reforming into its original untainted form. It will soon be the all powerful artifact that it originally was thousands of years ago, and you my dear Light Yagami will be its wielder". 

He looked at Light with a big smile on his face. 

Light stared at the Guardian. He didn't even know what to say to that. How on earth was he supposed to wield an all powerful artifact, especially after everything he had done. He held out The Book of Life to Kevin and said “No”. 

Kevin looked at him with a bemused expression on his face. “What do you mean no?” 

“Just what I said” Light snarled as he threw the book to the side, “You saw what I became when I used the Death Note. What do you think will happen when I start using an object with even more power?”. 

His voice started rising as he started getting even more worked up. ”I told you, I’m a monster, a serial killer of the highest order, and you want to give me even more power!? Are you insane!?”

Light could tell he was getting agitated, but he couldn't stop himself. No logic or reason could change who he was or what he had become. “I don't care what you saw in your visions or who you think I am, I'm not worthy of this and I never was!” He had a new target for his rage and he didnt care what he said to the all powerful Guardian. 

“In fact this is all your fault” he shouted, getting more and more worked up, his emotions and feelings all over the place. “If you had just left me alone and never brought me to the attention of the Shinigami King i would be a normal person, living a normal life. My father would still be ALIVE right now and my life wouldn't be in ruins!” he spat at Kevin who just stood in front of him not saying anything or arguing back with Light, but rather staying quiet with a look of deep sadness on his face. If anything this made Light even angrier. “Who do you think you are?, interfering in the lives of us mere mortals”, he shouted, storming over in front of Kevin and poking him in his heavily muscled chest. Light knew he was being unreasonable and that Kevin had only been trying to help him and this world, but the anger was far, far preferable to the crushing guilt and agony that was waiting to come crashing down on him the moment he calmed down. 

“And if you hadn’t interfered L would still be alive, You killed L you fucking, BASTARD!”, he was crying now, tears streaming uncontrollably down his face, “He was my soulmate and now he’s gone! I'll never see him again and it's all your fault,” he was pounding his fists on Kevins chest now, crying uncontrollably, and Kevin gathered Light fighting and struggling into his arms as he burst into heart wrenching sobs, mourning not only everything that happened, but everything that could never be. 

Kevin sank to the floor slowly, Light cradled like a child in his arms and let him mourn. He let his presence hold back the worst of the guilt and pain allowing Light to process it in manageable bits holding back the worst of it, until exhaustion overtook Light and he fell asleep. 

Over the next few days Kevin allowed Light to work through his pain and grief. While he spent a lot of it crying he also spent much of it cursing and swearing at Kevin, but at his true lowest Light just sat on the sofa he slept on, staring with haunted eyes into space for hours at a time.

***********************************************

Near was thinking furiously about what to do next. Every minute that passed was dangerous and he needed to come up with a plan before they came out the bubble. Suddenly a childish yes sinister smile crossed his face and he motioned Aizawa to come sit next to him. 

Aizawa gave one last glance at the time bubble and sat down next to Near staring at him curiously. “Tell me Aizawa”, Near said, his voice calm and quiet, “What do you think about Light Yagami as Kira? Do you think that he is innocent and should go unpunished for his crimes?”, Nears voice was light as though he was just thinking aloud. 

A furious look came across Aizawa’s face and he said ‘NO’ a bit too loudly. Fortunately everyone was still focused on the time bubble and Near motioned for him to lower his voice. “I couldn't agree more, Aizawa,” he said. “Light Yagami needs to face justice for everything he's done. He is ultimately completely responsible for all the actions of Kira and I am going to need your help to make sure he pays for his crimes”. 

Near knew he needed to keep it as justice related as possible. If Aizawa knew this was all about winning a game for him, he might not go along with his plan. 

Aizawa looked preturped. “But what can we do?” he said. You saw what that Guardian can do. There’s no way we can take him on”. Near was glad to see Aizawa was still passably intelligent and nodded. 

“You're completely right he said, “however he will not be here for much longer. And as soon as he goes, we will offer to escort Light Yagami to his apartment and drop him off. He will be far too busy to do it himself. As soon as we get him in the car you will smuggle The Book of Light from him, and then we will take him to a maximum security facility I had planned to take him to before all this happened”. 

A smile was growing on Aizawa’s face as Near spoke. “We know his power is linked to that book so once we have removed it, Light will be just a regular human being like us. I will then organise an expedited trial for him as Kira and long before the Guardian gets back Light will be executed”. 

He grabbed the toy man representing Light and flicked him onto his side. “Checkmate”. 

“As for The Book of Life, I will take and secure it in a location known only to myself. This way it won't be possible for anyone to exploit or use it”. 

Aizawa was looking worried. Are you sure this is going to work?” he asked. “Even if everything goes smoothly, when the Guardian comes back he’s going to want to know what happened to Light. What will we tell him”. 

Near waved his hand as if to shoo away Aizawa’s fears. “Don't worry we will just tell him there was a mix up on the way and Light got seized by the police and before we could get him out, he had been executed”. Near gave another wicked smirk. “He will probably feel so bad about failing Light again that he won't bother checking it out”. 

"Plus" he added, "it sounds like the situation on that other world will keep him busy for quite a while. For all we know it could be decades or longer before he even makes his way back to Earth". 

Aizawa still looked a little worried but he nodded at Near and said “All right, let's do it. . 

********************************************************

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly didn't expect the time bubble period to take two chapter, but it just felt wrong to short change Light's journey to self acceptance. I hope you are all enjoying reading it as much as i enjoyed writing it. The good news is i'm so into it I'm already halfway through the next chapter, so the wait will hopefully be shorter. As always feedback and kudos are life. ❤❤


	7. Revelations : Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light is about to confront his memories in a fairly unique way, but one that will hopefully help him recover fully from his ordeal. Aizawa and Near finalize their scheme for Light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well hopefully this wait wasn't as long, and while we aren't completely done with time bubble element of this story, were definitely getting there. Hope y'all enjoy!

On the fourth day Kevin sat down on the couch facing Light, crossed his legs and held out both his palms to Light. 

“Give me your hands Light” he calmly said, his face neutral. Light looked at him suspiciously. “Why should I?” he said, glaring at Kevin. He was having one of his more lucid moments but his rage was still very much alive and well. Kevin just looked at him calmly, and looked down at his hands, and up again at Light, who rolled his eyes, sighed and then crossed his legs on the couch and put his hands in Kevin’s. 

Kevin grasped his hands and told Light to close his eyes and empty his mind, which Light would have found impossible a few days ago but now with how wrung out and drained he felt, ended up being surprisingly easy. 

Suddenly he was in an open field. Beautiful green grass spread everywhere with a dark blue sky covering the horizon. All around them swirling through the air in glorious flight were bubbles. Light instantly knew that these were memories, or more specifically his memories. 

“Where are we?” he asked, staring around not knowing what to make of this space. 

Kevin, who was standing a few feet away smiled at him. “We are in your mind Light. This is how you see it so that you can grasp its complexities in a way that you can understand”. He sat down on the ‘grass’ motioning for Light to join him. As I see you've gathered, these are all your memories. Every single one, from your life, and your life as Kira”. As Kevin said this thousands of bubbles all tinged in varying degrees of darkness separated from the others and flew to surround Light, crowding in on him, pressing in, and Light started to feel like he was suffocating from all these memories. 

Kevin's voice came from outside the bubbles, “I need you to clear your mind Light, do not let these memories overwhelm you. It's extremely important you keep control in this space”. Light fought to clear his thoughts and after a minute the bubbles dispersed although Light could still see them hovering nearby waiting to swarm him again if he lost control. 

Kevin grasped his knee reassuringly. “Excellent work”, he said, a big grin plastered on his face. “You're better at this than I thought you would be. And I had some pretty high expectations”, he confided. 

Light gave a wry smile. He felt much more at peace at this moment then he had since he had awoken from his nightmare. “I could stay here forever” he sighed as a memory of his childhood landed in his outstretched hand. 

Light watched, as a seven year old Light chased his baby sister around the table, giggling madly as she ran away with his toy. He caught her, pinned her down and started tickling her as she laughed hysterically calling for their mother to come rescue her. Sachiko came and grabbed Light off his sister and started kissing him all over his face as Light struggled to get away, laughing his head off. 

The memory ended and flew off and Light felt a dull sense of melancholy at the innocence lost.

He looked at Kevin who carried on. “I know this feels like paradise compared to what's waiting for you out there at the moment but I need you to understand Light, this is just a mind space. If you stay here and refuse to come out, your body will atrophy and go into a coma. I brought you in here so that we can deal with your memories one by one. In here time is even slower then it is in the time bubble I created. In here you can observe and come to terms with all that happened on your own time”. 

Light frowned. “But why would i want to do that? he protested. “That sounds painful and i don't want to have to deal with all that … stuff”, he gestured wildly at all the dark memories hovering around them knowing he was sounding childish and petulant but struggling to find a reason to care. Kevin nodded in understanding. 

“If anyone can understand what you're going through Light it's myself. After all as I'm sure you remember, I am indirectly responsible for everything that happened to you including all the deaths that came about because of my actions”. He gave a sigh. “But that's not really what I’m talking about”. He opened his hands and a brilliantly glowing bubble appeared floating above it. Let me show you a memory of one of the worst days of my very, very long life”. 

He looked up, “Actually before i show you this, just some background. There was a planet called Renikier, “he said, and Light could hear the haunted tone in his voice. “It was a beautiful planet, with billions of beings living on it and they were one of the first I encountered with advanced technology. While i was there i started hearing very serious and persistent rumors of a cult who had managed to develop a weapon that could blow up the entire planet” He gave a self mocking laugh. “As this was well beyond any of the technology that i had seen at the time i drew it up as mere fanciful gossip and left to help out on another world. A few universal time slots later i was in a meeting with this world's leader when someone came running into the meeting from the Planet Renikier”. He pointed at the memory in his hand and Light looked inside. 

He watched as Kevin grabbed the messenger and asked her what was wrong. Completely winded she managed to gasp out that their entire planet was in danger and the Death Cult had activated their weapon. As she had been fleeing the planet she said, there were tremors and earthquakes running through the entire globe. Light watched as Kevins face went white and he flung himself off his chair and a portal tore open in front of him. 

The view changed and Light watched as Kevin flew through a timeless expanse, stars and space flying by at incredible speeds, and as they came out the other side, they emerged into space but this time a bright blue and gold planet took up the entire expanse in front of them. 

Light watched in horror as tremors and quakes ran through the planet and as he looked on, the entire world tore itself apart in massive chunks, pieces of the planet flying into space around them. Kevin, both past and present, had looks of such horror on his face that Light grabbed Kevin’s hand and closed it around the memory, forcing the Guardian to look at him. Tears were pouring down Kevin’s face and this time Light embraced him, hoping that in some small way he was helping. 

After a few minutes Kevin pulled back and wiped the tears from his eyes. This raw display of humanity from a being hundreds of thousands of years old touched Light in a deep way. He figured that if you were to live that long you would almost certainly have to sacrifice some of your humanity. Apparently Kevin had not only kept his humanity intact but also was far more human than a lot of people he had met in his short life. 

“Anyway”, Kevin continued, “as you can see, my arrogance that I knew everything led directly to the destruction of an entire planet. Try and beat that for guilt” he said, a dark smile crossing his face. . 

He looked up at Light, his eyes still wet. “After that I went into shock. I actually don't remember what happened next. All I know is some of my fellow Guardians found me a few Earth days later floating in the wreckage of Renikier, completely still and listless. They brought me back to Earth and helped me recover. It took a long time Light, but eventually I came to peace with what happened, and it helped make me into who I am today. This is why I fight so hard to make sure that something like that never happens again”. 

He grabbed Light by the shoulder and stared into Light’s eyes with a stark intensity. “It's why I trust you Light even more than I did before, to wield The Book of Life. You know more than anyone on this world the power it holds and the damage it can do. But even more importantly only you can envision the Light you and it together can bring into this world”. 

He let go of Light's shoulders and continued. “But first you need to come to terms with everything that happened. I promise you that you will come out through the other side stronger than ever before”. 

Light nodded. It almost felt selfish not to try after everything Kevin had shown him. 

“So how do we do this?”, he said. I mean where do we even begin”, he gestured at the millions of memories floating around them. 

“It’s easy”, Kevin said. Light looked at him and rolled his eyes. “All right, not easy”, Kevin laughed, “but we definitely know where to start. “Think about the memory where you picked up the Death Note for the first time and focus on it”. As he did so, Light saw one of the lighter colored memories zip into his hand and rest there. As he looked into its depths and watched his younger self pick up the Death note before carrying it home, Light felt all the emotions and feelings from that memory flow through his mind and he could feel the memory link itself into his consciousness. 

He understood why Kevin had brought him here. This was far easier to absorb and manage when he was doing it one memory at a time. 

“Very good,” Kevin said as he watched Light absorb the memory. “Let them come to you in order now”. 

He knew a hard one was coming next and he let the emotions wash over him as he absorbed his first killing, even if it had been with altruistic intentions. He could feel Kira’s dark presence in the background, almost completely subtle, but still pushing Light to kill, kill, kill.

His meeting with Ryuk was the first time Light could see the madness that would truly take hold later on. He watched as right before Ryuk came, he started laughing maniacally and recognised Kira celebrating in his newfound power. The disgust he felt was overwhelming. 

As time went by Light fell into his memories from his time as Kira. While they were difficult to process, sometimes almost impossibly so, he plowed on with grim determination. 

His memory of the murder of the FBI agents sent him scurrying back from the recollection dropping it like a hot potato, and he stared at his hands in horror, but that was nothing compared to the memory of killing Naomi Misora. The sheer cruelty of that one and raw Kira-ness of the entire thing had him trembling, and for an untold period of time Light just sat there, his knees drawn up against his chest and wanting nothing more than to rip the memory from his mind. 

As hard as that one was, his murder of L was the one that really sent him for a loop. He knew it was coming. He had gone through his memories from his time when he gave up the notebook hoping that they would help buffer him from the pain he knew would hit when he absorbed that memory, but nothing could have prepared him for the gut twisting pain that tore through him, and if Kevin hadn't been there to help him through it his mind might have given up and snapped. 

Thankfully after that, all his other memories until he picked up The Book of Life, were like watching through a fogged up mirror. While these memories were also his, they were far more Kira’s, and he could feel the taint that flowed through and overpowered each one. 

The one that stood out from this time period, was the memory of his father's death. While the raid on the mafia headquarters and everything leading up to his father lying in the hospital bed felt like a dream from another time, the moment when his father died felt vivid and real and Light realised that in that moment of grief, just for a moment, he had burst through, the tears and screams of anguish were genuinely his and not Kira’s performance. 

In a very small way this made him feel just a little bit better and brought some small closure to him on this tragedy. 

As Light absorbed each memory the darkness faded, and each one became a bright white color, matching all the others that surrounded him. 

Finally after what felt like weeks, Light released his last memory of being shot and writhing on the ground and stared at Kevin while it flew away, the last memory to turn white. He felt whole in a way he hadn't in years and finally he knew he could start moving on. 

During this whole process, Light also came to peace with what he had to do. He knew that his only way to atone for everything Kira had done was to take up the mantle of Guardian. At least then he could truly try and make the world a better place, in the way he had always been meant for. 

***************************************************

As he watched the opaque bubble encompassing Light and the Guardian, Aizawa considered every aspect of his and Near’s plan. It seemed flawless, but Aizawa was terrified of something going wrong, and the Guardian discovering what they had done. He had seen his reaction to Ryuk’s betrayal and had no idea if his reaction to them would be as violent. 

He turned to Near about to propose his thoughts when Near shook his head. “Are you having second thoughts already Aizawa?”

Aizawa gave Near a sharp look. “How did you know?” 

“It would be natural”, Near said in a calm monotonous tone. “Regular people are always second guessing their actions”. 

Aizawa frowned. “Well I'm not sure if you noticed us regular people, but we did see what happened to Ryuk and he also betrayed the Guardian. How do you think he will react to us betraying him?” 

Near sounded almost disappointed in his reply. “Aizawa, do you really think i wouldn't have taken his reaction into account? The odds of him returning in time and being able to unravel the complex web I’ve already planned, is less than three percent”.

“On the other hand if we do nothing the odds of Light Yagami getting away with mass murder are one hundred percent. Are you ok with those odds?”

He gave Aizawa a sharp look. “How will you face your daughter every night knowing you let the greatest serial killer of all time get away without moving a finger to stop him?”. 

Aizawa flinched. The truth of that was hard to ignore and could already picture his daughter's face every night as he lied to her. 

Something else was still bugging him though. “Why choose me?” he asked. ”I mean everyone here wants to see Light face justice. They all risked their lives to take on Kira knowing he might murder them at any time”. 

Near shook his head, his white hair flying back and forth. “I was watching all of them while the Guardian or Kevin, was explaining everything. They all bought his story and i could see that they all accepted that Light Yagami was not responsible for his actions” 

He gave a grim smile at Aizawa. “Only you kept a stoic face and i could tell that you weren't buying any of this ‘Light not being responsible for his actions’ propaganda that the Guardian was selling.”

“Even Matsuda?” Aizawa asked, “I mean he shot Light and he was almost ready to kill him…”

“Especially Matsuda” Near interrupted. “Matsuda is an idiot and from everything you told me, he worshiped the ground Light walked on before he found out he was Kira. He would love nothing more than to believe an easy lie that the man who worshiped and even loved …” 

Aizawa gave a stark look of disbelief at Near. “- Yes loved Aizawa - was innocent. I could see it the moment he walked in here from his body language that he had feelings for Light, even though he knew they would never be requited”. 

Aizawa shook his head. “I never took Matsuda to be a fag” he muttered. “Although then again I wouldn't have taken Light to be a fag either and he was in love with L, who apparently was also a fag”. 

He recoiled from the look of hate that Near gave him. “Never insult L in front of me again.” he hissed. “My mentor was no … faggot! Light just got inside his head that's all”. 

Near looked down at his watch and his eyes grew wide. “It's been 29 minutes since they went into the bubble and going by what the Guardian said we might only have a minute to get ready for when they come out of there.” 

He grabbed Aizawa’s arm. “As soon as I tell you to, go and grab Light and offer to help him to the car. He should still be quite weak and will appreciate the assistance. While you're helping him it should be easy enough to get in the car with him and then during the car ride sneak The Book of Life off of him” 

He gave Aizawa a phone number. “Send me a text when you're done and i will take care of the rest”. Aizawa nodded and stood up getting ready to make his move. 

***************************************************  
Near couldn't stop the grin from his face as Aizawa moved off. It was so easy manipulating him. If Aizawa knew that he had been chosen because Near could see how gullible and angry he was, he would be furious. It had been almost too easy to play on Aizawa’s emotions and now his plan was almost complete. And if the Guardian ever traced things back to them he had a very handy scapegoat ready. 

Aizawa was particularly an idiot if he couldn't see that Light had been completely under the influence of something during his time as Kira, after his reaction when he woke up as well as everything the Guardian had shown then. Near however knew the true reason for executing Light. It was the only way to win the game! 

Of course his manipulations had almost been ruined by Aizawa’s accusation of L being a fag! Near hadn't been lying when he said that he believed Light had got into L’s head. He was convinced that Light had perverted L’s mind somehow and had almost hit Aizawa for making such an accusation. 

Very few people knew that Mello's almost intense hatred of him was because of how he used to mock him and Matt for being a couple. But why shouldn't he. After all they deserved it for being perversions of nature. 

Near pulled out his cell phone that looked like a toy. He had some calls to make and time was almost up.

***************************************************

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really didn't start out with Near being such a douchebag even when i started writing this chapter, but god damn I love how it's developing. I'm fairly certain next chapter will be the last in the time bubble although the muse is my goddess and i must write as she wills!😉😉 As always kudos and feedback are life! 😊😊


	8. Emergance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Almost all of his questions have been answered, and Light is finally ready to embrace his role as Guardian and join the world again. However Near is waiting on the other side and he's far more dangerous than Light realized.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again I apologize for the long wait. This chapter was a bit more finicky and also the longest one yet, so it took a while to get to my standard of publication. As always I hope everyone enjoys.

Kevin was sitting looking at Light but at the same time Light felt that he was off in some other place. He waved his hand in Kevin’s face and even clapped his hands in front of him as loud as he could but nothing happened. 

Suddenly Kevin shook his head and his eyes focused on Light. “I’m sorry about that”, he said. “I wanted to give you time to work through everything, but as you can imagine it’s a little boring just sitting here for all this time, so I was scanning through some of the planets I’m helping manage and just making sure everything is going all right. Were you able to absorb all the memories?”. Light nodded. 

“How long was I going through them?”, he asked. 

Kevin scratched his head. “To be honest it’s a little hard to define. I mean in here it’s been a few months. While you’re able to go through a memory much faster than the real time the memory takes place in, it still takes time to absorb and you had almost five years of memories to work through. 

Light’s jaw dropped. 

Kevin waved his hand and a portal opened in mid air and through it Light could see himself and Kevin sitting on the couch, cross legged and holding each other’s hands with their eyes closed. 

“Now out there, it’s been about three weeks, time passes very slowly in one's mind but it still takes time to pass”. The view changed again to outside the time bubble and Light could see everyone in the warehouse completely frozen in place, no, not completely frozen. They were moving but so slowly it seemed each second there was ages in here. 

“Now out there just under half an hour has passed. As I’m sure you can imagine, managing two time dilations is not easy and as powerful as I am I won’t be able to hold this for much longer”. 

Light was confused. “Wait a moment”, he said. “How are we both in here and out there”, he gestured at the opaque bubble clearly visible in the portal. I thought you transported me inside my mind”. 

Kevin chuckled. “Nope nothing as elaborate as that. We are inside your mind in the form of a mental projection. Our bodies are still very much in the physical realm”. 

His face suddenly became very serious. “While it is possible to go into your mind in a physical way, it’s one of the most dangerous things you can do. While your mind easily grasps your mental form and will make sure you don’t do anything that will damage itself, in your physical form there are no barriers and your mind will try and reject you. One wrong move and you can delete vital memories at best and destroy your mind at worst”. 

Light shuddered, determined not to ever try that one. 

As Kevin waved his hand and closed the portal, Light happened to glance at Near and thought he saw something around him, an inky blackness that looked all too familiar. But the portal closed before he could see more and he shrugged it off as a trick of the light. 

“You know something's been bugging me while I was going through my memories, especially once Misa Misa came into the picture”. Kevin had a smirk on his face as if he knew what Light was about to say. 

“So I haven’t told anyone this yet, in fact I only fully grasped it while I was going through this whole process but I’m… he started stammering and stuttering, trying to say the word that he couldn’t seem to get past his lips. 

Kevin smiled at him and put his hand on Light's shoulder. “Go on Light”, he said, his tone warm and full of love, “say it. I promise you I’m here for you”. 

Light gulped and turned his face away from Kevin’s before stammering “I’m, I’m, g-g-gay”. He looked at Kevin’s face terrified of the judgment he irrationally thought might be there. 

Instead Kevin’s smile was bigger than ever before and he pulled Light into his arms again and said the most beautiful words Light had ever heard, “of course you are, and I love you and accept you exactly for you who you are.” He looked into Light’s eyes with a deep intensity. “Thank you for sharing your truth with me Light. Saying those words for the first time is one of the hardest things you can do and an incredibly important step in your journey to self acceptance. I’m truly honored that you felt you could share that with me”. 

“Of course L being your soulmate was a bit of a give away on that front” he teased with a sly grin.

Light felt a wave of relief flood through every inch of him and he was crying again, but this time tears of happiness. 

“So you don’t hate me?”, he asked, wiping away his tears and feeling stupid for even asking the question. 

“Of course not” was Kevin’s immediate reply. “Be a bit of a hypocrite if I did”. 

Light blinked for a moment in confusion and then it hit him. “Wait your gay as well?” he said, far too loudly, his voice echoing in the vast mind space. 

Kevin nodded and gave a sly grin at Light. “It helps when you're immortal,” he said. “As I never have children it makes life a lot easier”. A familiar look of pain swept across his face and Light knew he was reliving another painful memory. 

“Initially the first few guardians I made were mostly heterosexual or bisexual just because the numbers are mostly in their favor but I learnt the hard way what a mistake that was”. He was playing with the grass absently, his mind clearly in another place. 

“It took a while” he carried on, but after the first few universal centuries and watching multiple generations of children dying on them, almost every one of these Guardians came to me begging me to remove their immortality. The pain was too much for them and they couldn’t bear it”. 

Kevin was now aggressively playing with grass clearly very distraught. “Unfortunately removing a Guardian's immortality, even a willing one, is a horrific procedure and incredibly painful. It almost destroyed me the first few times and I only got through it by the looks of gratitude they gave me when they were mortal again”. 

He sighed. “Of course they didn’t live long after that. The procedure was too taxing but after that I made it a hard policy that I grant Guardian status on homosexual beings only, and only those that have no interest in raising children”. He looked at Light, a wan smile on his face. 

“Of course that severely limited my choices but at least I never had to go through that horror again”. Light felt bad but needed to ask, “how about barren straight people? I mean they won’t have kids and so long as they don’t want to adopt or anything…” but Kevin was already shaking his head. 

“No,” he said emphatically. “The process of becoming a Guardian heals all wounds, even ones that have been there since birth so they wouldn’t be barren anymore. And even if they had no interest in raising kids, sooner or later they would have a child, by slipping up”. He looked at Light who could see a twinkle in his eyes. 

“One of the perks of being a Guardian is a very high Sex drive. And as we tend to be the perfect version of our species, in our case humans, attracting mates is very easy”. Light felt his cheeks burn bright red and Kevin gave a wicked laugh. “Oh trust me the sex is amazing. Every. Single. Time. You’ll see once we’re out there, you’ll find all the hot guys will be hitting on you left, right and Centre. 

Suddenly Light's question popped back in his head. “So if I’m gay” he asked, “how was I able to have a relationship and have sex with Misa and Takada? Was Kira straight or something?” That didn’t feel right. 

Kevin shook his head. “That’s a tough one to answer Light. It’s not like your bi or anything. The only thing that comes to mind is, because Kira was feeding on all your darkest emotions and memories, your internal homophobia must have been a massive source of energy for it and it used that to sustain itself and in so doing was able to use Misa and Takada sexually and emotionally to further its goals”. 

He squeezed Light's hand. “Make no mistake, Kira as an entity had no sexual attraction. All it did was manipulate and exploit, and Misa and Takada were convenient pawns for it to play with”. 

Light nodded. “So what happened to Kira? I remember a massive battle taking place between a being of Light and a being of darkness. Was that my imagination? And how did all the bullets vanish? I distinctly remember getting shot multiple times”, he said with a frown, rubbing his hands over his stomach where the phantom pain still lingered. 

Kevin shook his head. “That battle as well as your consciousness was taking place on a realm far beyond this one. I showed you what it looked like over here but that was a small representation of the actual fight. Those two forces, the life aspect and the death aspect, or as you knew it, Kira, were split from each other when the Shinigami King tore the original Death Note from The Book of Life”. 

Light looked around for the book but realized it wasn’t here with them in his mind. 

“The battle was a fight between who could claim dominion and incorporate the other back into itself. While Death had always been an aspect of Life, now it could be the dominant aspect if it won. If that happened the results would’ve been catastrophic. The Book of Life would’ve become fully corrupted and I would’ve had to destroy it and your chances for being a Guardian would’ve vanished as well”. 

“Actually” he mused, ”it would’ve been far worse than that. Because you were bonded with the book, Kira as you knew it, would’ve destroyed ‘Light” and I would’ve had a true god of death on my hands. One who would’ve been extremely difficult to terminate”. 

He shook his hand as if waving that terrible thought away. “But thank goodness that never happened. Although I must admit if I hadn’t used L’s name to bring back your humanity it probably would’ve”. 

Light suddenly remembered something. “So that was your voice in my head” he exclaimed. “The one I heard right as Kira seemed to be winning” 

Kevin nodded. “I was watching and I knew that only one thing could tip the balance in your favor. Your feelings for L were so strong, the life force was able to fully subsume Kira back into itself.” 

Light waited for the overwhelming grief and loss to overtake him but while the pain was still there, it was more of an ache of remembrance than the overriding guilt he had felt before. It appeared dealing with the grief and the memories had helped even more than he realized.

Kevin was still talking. “So Kira is now back into its yin-yang coexistence with the life force. The two eternally balancing each other out. You do not need to worry about Kira ever returning again” he smiled. 

"As for the bullets vanishing, The Book of Life is one of the most powerful artifacts in existence. Healing a few bullet wounds is just a tiny drop of what it can do."

Light nodded and another memory from his time in that other realm nudged at him. 

“When I was in that other place I saw L before me, or at least his spirit was there. Was that real?” 

Kevin smiled and nodded. “Yes it was. His spirit has been with you since the day he died. His soul was instantly able to see and grasp what Kira was and your soulmate bond was strong enough to keep him on this plane until he could talk to you”. 

A small grin appeared on his face. “I actually spoke to him before I made my appearance In the warehouse,” he said. “His soul like yours is very unique and he instantly knew what I was and demanded he be able to talk to you after I explained everything that had happened to you after you picked up the Death Note”. 

“Of course he could only talk to you in that realm. Once you woke up he had to move onto his next stage”. Light had a feeling Kevin was holding something back. 

“He said someone would be waiting to help me when I woke up. I assume that was you?”

“Indeed” Kevin replied. I did tell him I would be here to help you through all this. I mean it’s the least I could do to fix my absolutely colossal mistake of not taking any precautions with the Shinigami King”. He sighed ruefully. 

Another memory was bugging Light. “He said he would see me again soon”, Light realized he had been waiting all this time to ask this question. “What did he mean by that? Will I be able to go into that realm again and speak to him?” 

Kevin wasn’t looking at him but rather at the ground. “I’m afraid not Light. He has moved on now and his soul will no longer be able to contact you”. 

Light’ breath caught in his throat, loss threatening to overtake him again. 

Kevin looked up with a mischievous grin. “Of course when I say he moved on, what I mean is he has moved on to being reincarnated” 

Light lost all feeling as he stared at Kevin with an impossible hope. 

“Say that again,” he said. Incredulity straining his voice. 

Kevin’s smile grew broader. “I didn't want to say anything until you had processed all your memories but I am reincarnating L into another body. Oh not to worry” he said, reading Light's panicked expression correctly, “I'm reincarnating him into the embryo of a woman whose fetus was already going to be a stillborn. He isn't going to be shoved into some random person’s body. He will have his own body and will look and feel exactly like the L you knew and loved with the same soul.”

Light gaped. “You can actually do that?” he exclaimed. “I thought all humans go to Mu which as I understood meant nothingness. “Although” he mused, “I saw L’s soul so that can't be true can it?” 

Kevin nodded. “While Ryuk wasn't technically lying, The afterlife is a state of being that the Shinigami can't grasp. It's far more than the heaven and hell systems that classic religion preaches and a state only humans can ascend to after they die. As the Shinigami are Gods of Death they came to assume that human souls vanish into nothing when they died as they couldn't see their souls.Their arrogance would not allow them to come to terms with the fact that humans could become something much more after they die.” 

Light took a deep breath. “So L will be reincarnated into a baby? But that means I would have to wait at least twenty years to be with him again. Isn't there a way you could reincarnate him in another person's body and then change it? I’m sure you're powerful enough to do it.”

Light watched as Kevin’s face grew pained as if he was trying to figure out how to explain something. “There are two problems with resurrection into an adult body” he finally said. “ The first is that he would be reincarnated into someone else's body and modifying a fully grown body is one of the most difficult things and very easy to mess up so he wouldn't be the L you know and love. The second is that he will have all the experiences from the previous owner of that body trapped in there with him. The dual identities would tear him apart and it would be hell.”

“Reincarnating him as a barely conceived fetus avoids all that as it has no experience, and as a fetus, is in constant development, introducing a change to it is easy and has no trauma on the body.” 

Light gave a whistle. He had no idea reincarnation was so hard. “But won't he grow up with a whole other life, with totally different experiences and memories? He still won't be my L”. 

Kevin shook his head and smiled. “While you do have a point, the soul of L will be inside him, molding him as he grows up into the L you know and love. It will be a completely natural harmonious process and you will get your soulmate back. And when the time is right and he can withstand the process his memories of his previous life will be restored as well”. 

Light shuddered. “But won't that cause a conflict, just like if you reincarnated him in someone else’s body?”

“No it wont” Kevin disagreed. “Someone else’s memories are like someone else’s tissue. When you try and transplant them there will always be an inherent conflict no matter how similar the two people are. In this case it’s L’s memories being transplanted into L, ergo no conflict.” Kevin finished with a grand gesture. 

LIght was still unhappy. “But that still means I have to wait at least twenty years to see L”, he lamented. “Surely there must be another way!” His eyes grew wide, “How about resurrection?” he exclaimed. “Surely you could resurrect him in his own body?.” 

Kevin blanched. “Absolutely not!” he almost shouted. “Resurrection is the reversal of death and one of the most dangerous and darkest forms of magic.” 

He calmed down and then amended, “It can only be done under two circumstances”. Kevin raised two fingers. “One - if the person was killed in a non natural way, meaning by some form of magic”. Light face apparently showed excitement because Kevin cut him off. “And two”, he said emphatically, “it needs to be done right after the person dies. If the person’s body has started to decompose in any way they will return as the undead, and live an eternity of agony until they are destroyed completely” Light’s face fell and Kevin, noticing, took his hand and squeezed it reassuringly. 

“I know it’s hard Light but the twenty years will fly by and before you know if you will be back together again.” He patted Light’s hand, “I promise you learning how to use The Book of Light and becoming the Guardian is going to keep you VERY busy for the next few years”. 

He stood up, “Anyway I think it's time we returned back to our reality. There’s still much to do before I go”. Light got up with him and suddenly he was back in his own body, cross legged on the couch and holding Kevin’s hands. He let go and tried to stand up but almost collapsed as his legs gave up under him. “Whoa”, Kevin said, grabbing Light’s arm and helping him back onto the couch. “Take it easy. It's going to be a few minutes before you're ready to stand up”. 

Light nodded and gave himself a few minutes to recover, realising that he had technically been sitting in that position for a few weeks without eating, drinking or sleeping. ‘How was he even still alive?’ he wondered. He figured it must have something to do with Kevin, or perhaps The Book of Life which sustained him. 

Seeing the streams of energy still being absorbed into The Book, Light realised Kevin had never answered his question and was now determined to get an answer.

“So you never answered my question," he prompted. “What are these streams of energy coming into the book?’ 

Kevin’s eyebrows raised. “I almost forgot about that,'' he muttered. “Well to put it simply they are the Death Notes returning home. They are being summoned back into “The book of Life after thousands of years. Only once all the Death Notes and their corruptions have been absorbed into the book, can it be complete”. 

This made perfect sense to Light and he nodded. “So why is it taking weeks for them all to come back?” he asked. Surely it wouldn't take that long”. 

Kevin chuckled. “You are correct sir, except it has not been a few weeks, in reality it's only been a few hours since you restored The Book of Life with your transformation. There are actually thousands of books from the time when the Shinigami were at their apex, almost all of them under the control of the Shinigami King, whom I assume”, he gave a baleful look into the ceiling above them, “is trying everything in his power to stop them from reintegrating into their original form.” 

Kevin’s smile grew dark. “He can try of course. No power in the universe can stop The Book of Life coming back together again now.”

It seemed that the more questions Kevin answered the more questions Light had. “So won't that essentially destroy the Shinigami? I mean they won't be able to take any more lives and the last of them will die.”He didn't know why this thought made him sad. 

Kevin nodded somberly. “Yes indeed it will,” he said. “While I was truly hoping to be able to help restore their world, they and their King are too intrinsically tied together. At this point the only thing we can do is close the door and throw away the key.” He looked at Light’s face noting his sad expression. “The death of a species is never something to celebrate” he noted. “Even one as parasitic as the Shinigami. Unfortunately their time is now over, and fortunately for us, it will help ensure Earth’s survival”, he said in an encouraging tone. 

“Now it’s time for us to return to the regular time space. Be very careful, once I lower the time bubble around us”, he motioned to the opaque bubble surrounding them. “It’s going to feel like you got into a car that went from five miles an hour to five hundred.” He shuddered.. “The feeling is... unpleasant but give yourself a few minutes and you will regain your equilibrium.” 

He looked at Light. “Is there anything else you wish to ask before we leave?”. Light realised that he still had no idea how to use The Book of Life, or its rules or even when he should use it. He mentioned all this to Kevin, who gave him a reassuring pat on his shoulder.

“Not to worry. That is all stuff we will deal with later. For now I just want you to get established and get your life back on track. As you saw in the memories I showed you I have to travel off world almost as soon as we leave this time bubble so I won't have time to explain everything but the good news is the rules to The Book of Life are all written inside.” He motioned with his hand and The Book of Life flew towards Light, who caught it reflexively and opened it. Indeed on the first page written in stunning golden calligraphy were the rules of The Book of Life. There were many, although not as many as he thought there might be, and he felt a little better. 

“I promise I will be back as soon as humanly possible, but one of the things you can do while I’m gone”, Kevin elucidated, “is go through those rules with a fine tooth comb. You're going to want to make sure you know them better than you know yourself. Oh and before I forget”, Kevin reached into a pocket Light could swear hadn't been there a second ago, and pulled out a plain black card that looked like a credit card but there was no writing anywhere on it. “This card is linked to my fairly substantial accounts I keep on Earth. While I would appreciate it if you don't abuse it completely, feel free to use it to establish a life for yourself while you acclimate to being a guardian.”

He gave Light a smile. “I insist you make it a very comfortable one," he said. It’s the least I can do for you”. He looked contemplative. “Last I heard the penthouse suite at the Park Court Akasaka Hinokicho Tower, was still available” His smile broadened as Light let out a whistle. He knew this apartment was one of the most expensive in Tokyo and he couldn't believe Kevin was offering to get it for him. 

Kevin interrupted Light as he started stammering that he couldn't take such an expensive gift from Kevin, “It’s just Money Light. When you've been around as long as I have you accumulate a lot of it. Especially as I have access to knowledge and resources that could make me a billionaire a hundred times over whenever I want. Trust me this is a small price to pay to make you, and in the future L, happy”. 

Light didn't know what to say so he stammered his thanks. Kevin nodded and raised his hand and snapped his fingers. Immediately the bubble became translucent and started disintegrating around them. As it collapsed Light felt the sensation Kevin had described except it was a hundred times worse, and if his stomach hadn't been so empty, he would've hurled the contents all over the floor. 

Thankfully after a few seconds the sensation passed and Light got up off the couch and as he looked around them he noticed everyone was staring at him and Kevin. As he turned and faced Near, Light stared in abject horror at what he saw in front of him. 

***************************************************

Near could see the bubble become more translucent as he put down his phone finishing his final call to his contact at the "Burakkuhōru” facility, which in English literally translated to blackhole. 

They knew to expect Light once he gave the call and he already had the execution team there on standby ready to kill Light. He wasn't taking any chances. 

He watched as Light and the Guardian emerged from the time bubble, Light looked almost sick but seemed to recover quickly. Near stared at him and the Guardian in utter hatred. The thought of this piece of human filth and his enabler getting away from him almost made him want to throw up himself. 

He held his emotions down. Soon he would have Light in his grasp and then he would finally win. Light’s death was the only thing that could satiate him. He wished he could kill the Guardian too, he seemed to feel an almost equally intense level of loathing for him as he did for Light but he was willing to acknowledge that there was nothing he could do against the all powerful being. Light on the other hand….

He gave what he hoped was a casual smile as Light turned to look at him but stopped as he watched Light staring at him in dread. 

***************************************************

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry/not sorry for the cliffhanger y'all! Any theories as to what's happening with Near? Hint - its not as simple as it might seem! 😉  
> As always kudos and feedback are much appreciated!


	9. Guardians Egress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light and Kevin have emerged back into the world only to be confronted by a new threat from Near, and something else!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to post this a lot earlier but with the election here I was so distracted i could barely write. I hope this chapter makes up for the delay and I'll try have the next chapter out a bit sooner. As always Enjoy!
> 
> Here's a cheat sheet of some of the terms i used in earlier chapters.  
> Kerebor - Guardian of Veldheer  
> Veldheer - A world filled with powerful magic and science  
> Eldien - The rival planet to Veldheer  
> The Eldar - A mysterious group of wizards who now rule Veldheer  
> Renikier - Planet destroyed due to death cult invention

As he stared at Near, Light tried to grasp what he was looking at. Near’s physical body looked as it always did, a young androgynous looking boy with curly white hair and a childlike face. But that face was now grimaced in a horrific parody of a smile and surrounding Near was the darkness he had mistaken for a trick of the light earlier. Except this was no trick. The darkness exuded power and corruption and Light could feel it trying to infect him and knew that if left alone, it would poison every one in the warehouse. Had he not been bonded to The Book of Life he sensed the corruption would have overwhelmed him in seconds, turning him back into Kira. 

Thankfully he was able, with a fair amount of ease, to shove it away from him. 

However it was the shape of the darkness that truly terrified him. It resembled a massive skull supported by four legs, and although the shape was almost amorphous, he could make it out quite clearly. He knew he had seen that likeness before somewhere, but he couldn't quite put his finger on it. 

He turned to Kevin to see if he had noticed, but Kevin seemed to be somewhat unaware of what was happening, as he was looking at Near with a look of mild bemusement on his face, but not the horror that Light would expect to see as if he saw the same thing Light was seeing. 

As Light observed the darkness he realised that, although it resembled the original corruption that had infected him, this version came from a different source. Whatever it was, its source was not from The Book of Life or the Death Note, but something almost as powerful. He didn't know exactly how he knew, but it felt… different. Like tar instead of oil. All Light knew is that this new corruption posed a threat that not even the Guardian could see and he had no idea how to alert Kevin without also alerting the presence behind the corruption. 

Suddenly Near opened his mouth and even his voice sounded different, more monotonous and yet simultaneously full of hatred, although it was so subtle he wasn't sure he would have picked it up if he hadn't already seen the darkness behind Near. “So how do you feel now Light?” Near enquired. “Were you able to come to peace with everything you did during your tenure as Kira?”

Light could feel Near's influence here. Whatever was happening, it was like what happened with him, when he had been corrupted. It was taking Near’s darkest aspects and highlighting them to the maximum. 

Light knew he had to keep things calm until he could get Kevin’s attention and pull him away. Fortunately he was able to draw on all his acting experience as Kira and put on a calm facade. “I feel much better Near,” he replied, “like a new man. Of course without the Guardian’s help I would never have been able to get over it as quickly as I did, so I owe him a deep debt of gratitude”

He gave a small smile in Kevin’s direction. 

A sneer crossed Near’s face and out of the corner of his eye Light saw Aizawa and the rest of the task force mimic the expression. The influence was spreading. “So you're just over it now huh?’ Near’s voice was ice. “It must be nice to just throw away all the guilt from the hundreds of thousands of murders you committed and not feel the pain anymore. I bet you feel really good about that”. His expression grew darker. “And you're getting away without having to pay for any of your crimes. Does that make you feel better Light Yagami?” 

Light thought carefully about his reply. While the corruption was definitely amping his emotions, these were definitely feelings that Near was having and he needed to play this very carefully. 

Suddenly an idea came to him. “Of course I still feel horrible about everything I did” he exclaimed with righteous indignation. “If you saw what the Guardian did to me in that bubble you would know I paid for my crimes a thousand times over”. He saw Kevin’s eyes flicker in his direction for a split second before he looked away. “I was in literal hell over there”, Light continued. “He punished me with the most horrendous punishments and healed me every time. It’s the only reason I'm still alive.“ He decided to go all out. “And because we were in a time loop he was able to do it for years while only a half hour passed out here”. 

Suddenly Light felt a presence in his head, a presence that was angry but also curious, ‘What are you DOING, Light?’ He could hear Kevin’s voice in his mind and knew instinctively that he could reply back in his mind, His plan had worked! ‘I was trying to get your attention in a subtle way, and was hoping you would find a way to contact me, to find out why I was telling such obvious lies. Can you NOT see what’s going on with Near?’ Light thought back with a note of incredulity. He still didn't understand how he could see this but the Guardian couldn't. 

Kevin’s expression did not change in the slightest but Light could feel his consternation in his mind and knew that Kevin indeed, did not discern what Light saw. 

‘Tell me what you see Light’, the thought came through with a note of worry. ‘Do not leave out a single detail.’ Light described in detail the dark image that he saw surrounding Near, who was now looking at him with a puzzled expression on his face like the one had, had when Light, NO, Kira - had been provoking him to test if the Death Note Near had held was real. 

All of a sudden the dark image around Near vanished, and Light felt the corruption’s influence vanish as well. 

‘What are you seeing now?’ Kevin asked in his mind. Light explained how the corruption and the darkness around Near had vanished and Kevin’s mind grew even more tense. ‘Shit’ he thought at Light, ‘It knows that you can see it’. Suddenly Kevin started glowing brilliantly, almost blindingly bright. Before Light could even blink he was in front of Near and holding his face in a death grip, looking at Near with eyes that were steaming white energy. 

Near met Kevin’s gaze and although there were tears flowing down his eyes, he never blinked once. After a few seconds Kevin let go of Near’s face and the glow around him dimmed and vanished. He turned to Light and said, “I can't see anything. Whatever presence you were seeing is gone. It must have fled when it realised you could see it”. 

Everyone in the warehouse suddenly started talking and shouting questions, all trying to figure out what had just happened. Before Light or Kevin could answer there was a loud ‘Gong’ sound and Kevin swore loudly and pulled a familiar golden disk out of mid air. Immediately the disc lit up and Kerebor’s face appeared and he looked frantic. “What's the status?” Kevin barked. 

Kerebor’s face went white but he immediately replied. “The situation is dire, My Lord. I threatened the Eldar and warned them that you were on the way, and there would be hell to pay if they broke the treaty.” His voice got even more panicked. “They told me they didn't care and that I was welcome to try and stop them. When I tried to overpower their commander the spell backfired and I was almost overpowered myself.” Light could see the worry in his eyes. 

“The next thing I knew they were all targeting me with their magic and they almost managed to subdue me. If i had not teleported out of there i don't know what would have happened.” He stared intently at Kevin. “They are being aided by something, My Lord. I don't know if it's him or some other source of power but there’s no way their magic should have been that powerful”

The view in the disc shifted and Light saw in crisp detail a massive field filled with completely alien flora and fauna and creatures that he had never seen before. In the center he could see what was clearly an army of millions of beings, and from the activity going on it was evident that they were packing up and getting ready to leave. He could see alien spacecraft landing on the edge of the camp and troops being loaded into them. The view changed back to Kerebor. 

“That is the current status of the army, My Lord. If you don't get here soon they're going to take off and head to Eldien and nothing will be able to stop them then.” 

Kevin swore again and nodded. “Do whatever you can to delay them,” he instructed Kerebor.”Keep the magic light and dont do anything too dramatic, and odds are they will think it's just natural, at least till I get there.” Kerebor nodded and then asked in a worried voice, “Um how long do you think that will be My Lord? I'm sorry I don't mean to pry it's just that” - Kevin cut him off. “Don't apologize Kerebor. It's a very valid question and if things weren't so urgent here I would have left as soon as you first called”. 

He waved his hand and what looked like a map of the universe filled the entire warehouse. As Light watched entire solar systems and galaxies floated by. Kevin looked at it for a few seconds before snapping his fingers and the image vanished. “Judging by the current set of the Milky Way I can be there in ten universal cycles, although I will only be able to safely leave in ten Earth minutes. ”Kerebor’s face blanched. “I don't know if I can hold them here that long My Lord. Even with meddling they will probably be ready to leave in at most five universal cycles.” 

Kevin’s expression was grim. “This is what I trained you for Kerebor. Just remember to use simple things like the wildlife and small weather effects to slow them down. You and I both know what a Leviathan fog can do to a spaceship.” 

Kerebor looked a little more relaxed and nodded. “Very good, My Lord. I will do everything in my power. I hope you arrive as soon as possible” With a final nod he and the disc vanished. 

Kevin immediately stood up. “Well that's my cue to leave. If you have any questions feel free to ask Light and he will answer them as best he can.” 

He strode over to Light and grabbed him into a bone crushing hug. Light could feel his presence in his mind again. ‘Whatever you sensed earlier, it's not gone. I can't sense it and I can't feel it except in the way of a sort of general wrongness, which means whatever it is, it's incredibly powerful and probably very intelligent. And it now knows you can see it.’ Light felt a familiar feeling of panic and anxiety coming over him. ‘So what am I supposed to do?’ he thought back frantically. ‘I mean if you can't sense it, or find out where it is, how am I going to confront it?’ 

Kevin let go of Light, held him by his shoulders and said out loud, “Good luck Light. I will be back as soon as I can and we will pick it up from there.” But in his mind he was saying, ‘There are some forces that even I struggle with. Whatever it is, it's scared of you, Light. It only vanished when it saw you noticed it, before I could even see it. I don't think it will make any overt moves for now but keep an eye on Near. Whatever it’s plans are, they heavily involve him’. 

His eyes flickered over to Aizawa. ‘Also keep an eye on Aizawa and possibly Matsuda. Whatever this thing is planning I sense their involvement in it, although Aizawa is a lot more directly connected.’

As he let go of Light’s shoulders he gave a parting thought. ‘I'm so sorry i can't be here to help you directly with this Light. If the fate of a galaxy did not rest on me leaving right now I would stay. Trust in The Book of Life. Your connection to it is far more primal then i thought it would be, and it will help you. Just remember, it’s not just a book. It’s an entity all to itself and I can guarantee you it will not tolerate this “thing” ‘trying to harm you, at least directly’ he amended. Light could feel Kevin’s anger permeating throughout his thoughts. 

He turned to leave and suddenly his eyes fell on Ryuk who was still stuck in the ground weakly struggling to get free. 

“As for you Ryuk, I’m sending you back to the Shinigami world. I will repair your wings, but only so you can fly to your master and give him this message from me.” In a blink Kevin was next to Ryuk and hauled him out of the ground by his neck hovering in mid air and holding the Shinigami with one hand. 

Light heard sickening crunches as Ryuk’s wings healed themselves and he could see the agony in his eyes, even though he couldn’t make a sound due to his lips still being sealed together. 

“Tell the Shinigami King that I am coming. I will return and when I do my wrath will fall upon him and any who stand between us." Kevin's eyes were now streaming light, the anger very easy to read on his face. "His betrayal has earned my anger and I will find him, no matter where he hides or how far he runs.”

Kevin’s voice lowered to a venomous whisper, which Light could somehow hear quite clearly. “I suspect he’s somehow involved with what’s happening with Near at the moment, and it’s only pure luck that I can't investigate this directly myself at the moment. However if he is involved, I will make his torment last as long as his entire current lifespan.”

He patted Ryuk on the cheek with a condescending pat. “Do be a dear and deliver that message for me. Oh and make sure he gets, Every, Single, Word.” 

He seemed to be about to let Ryuk go and then suddenly gripped his throat very tightly. “Needless to say your deal with Light Yagami is null and void. As there are no Death Notes you cannot write his name, and furthermore him being a guardian would protect him even if you did. However just to make sure that you or your master do not try any magical loopholes you will relinquish your claim on his life right now.” 

Kevin released Ryuk whose lips unsealed, and he let out a whimper of discomfort but stayed in the air, his wings fully healed. 

Kevin was glowing brightly again and he was staring at Ryuk. “Speak the words Ryuk. You know exactly what you have to say. Deviate in the slightest and I will put you in such agony, as you have never imagined could exist.” 

Ryuk gave a terrified look at the Guardian before shaking his head and crying. “I can't, Guardian. You have no idea what he will do to me if I…" A tendril of energy shot out from the Guardian and into Ryuk, whose mouth opened up into silent scream, Light pouring out of his mouth and eyes and after a few seconds the Light faded and Ryuk fell towards the ground, but was halted by Kevin, who levitated him with a flip of his hand till he was back at his original elevation. 

Light thought Ryuk had looked terrified before, but that was nothing compared to the expression he had on now. 

Kevin leaned forward and hissed “SAY IT!” 

Ryuk turned to Light without hesitation this time and intoned, “I Ryuk, Shinigami and claimant to Light Yagami’s life, hereby give up my claim in all shapes and forms. My hold on his life is thus null and void and forevermore relinquished from here into eternity.”

This sounded far too formal for the normally crass Ryuk, and Light knew that this must be an official declaration, a way for a Shinigami to give up their claim on a human. 

Kevin gave Ryuk a dark smile. “There, that wasn't so hard was it? I’m glad we don't have to go through that again.” He actually looked disappointed, but Light wasn't going to say anything. 

Kevin looked down at a watch on his wrist. “Well it’s time for you to go. I would move as fast as you can if I were you. You will have you five minutes before I permanently seal all the portals coming into this world. You do not want me to find you here with my message undelivered when I return” he said, a grim smile promising pain beyond measure if that was the case. 

Ryuk immediately flew up into the sky, clearly frantic to get away. Kevin opened his hand and in his palm there were ten gleaming orbs of light. As the orbs began spinning slowly in place, Kevin started intoning in a loud and authoritative voice - 

Ten portals, Shinigami use  
A power they have much abused  
If Gods of Death descend from them  
Their immortal forms, must fates condemn  
So close them shut, forever more  
No longer shall they be a door  
The seal is set, the time is come  
For Gods of Death, to be undone  
Yon spell is cast, the gateways closed  
My will is firm, and unopposed  
No more shall Death, come from on high  
Their time is done, Thus say I

Kevin lifted his hand and the glowing orbs flew up in the air each one flying off in its own direction. Light noticed one of them going in exactly the same direction Ryuk had gone although at a slower pace. 

Kevin lowered his hand and dropped to the floor. He looked around the warehouse before waving his hand and a portal appeared in front of him, similar to the one Light had seen in Kevin’s memory when he opened one to try and stop Renikier from being destroyed, 

A parting thought popped into Light’s head, ‘Good luck my friend and may The Book of Life be with you.’ And then he was gone and the portal vanished behind him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Kevin's gone for now (I really wanted Light to have time to grow on his own), but don't worry he will be back!  
> P.s. I hope you like the spell I made. I rewrote the thing like twenty times and I hope it sounds 'magical' enough lol.  
> As always kudos and feedback are life


	10. Corruptions Gambit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light faces the team for the first time without the backing of the all powerful Guardian. Will they accept and forgive him or will he be rejected for everything Kira did? Also Near makes a move!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hate it when these postings take so long. We're entering the holiday season and works getting really crazy, but thank you all for sticking with me and I will keep trying to post a chapter a week whenever possible. Enjoy!

There was stunned silence in the warehouse in the moments after the Guardian vanished. For a minute no one seemed to know what to say or do, and Light realized that Kevin’s presence had been this overpowering influence holding everything together and now that he was gone, he had no idea what was going to happen. 

Everyone turned to look at Light who suddenly felt sick with worry. He had no clue what to say to these people, many of whom he knew, still viewed him as culpable in the mass murder of hundreds of thousands. Light felt unsure and almost weak. He realised that even though his body and his mind were twenty three years old and he had the memories of this time and the events that happened, his actual mental age was stuck back at seventeen, the day he had picked up the notebook plus a few months during his memory loss. He could sense himself starting to panic inside and he did not know what would've happened next if Matsuda hadn't walked up to him and held out his hand. 

Light stared incredulously at Matsuda for a moment before Matsuda spoke. “I uh, I mmm, I want to apologise for shooting you,” he blurted out all of a sudden. “I could have tried to tackle you or something, and I know that I hurt you, But I was just so angry at your betrayal” he blurted out at the end. 

Light could see the pain in Matsuda’s eyes, the hurt and anger still there, yet Matsuda forgave him and was even apologizing to him! At that moment Light saw a whole other side to the bumbling detective. He saw the strength of character, and the iron will the man possessed. Someone who could look at the man who had broken everything he knew and believed and still forgive him after all that. 

Light immediately grabbed Matsuda’s hand and shook it. What he really wanted to do was hug the detective for being so kind and understanding when he had no reason to, but Light didnt want to overstep his bounds and he figured he had a while to go before they were on those kind of terms.

He gave a shy smile at Matsuda and said, “There's nothing to forgive Matsuda. I, or rather Kira, was a huge threat to everyone in this warehouse. Had you not shot me, I can guarantee with near one hundred percent certainty at the speed I write and the pace you move I would have killed at least three of you before you could get to me”, he added contemplatively, “possibly four”. 

Light noticed the look of horror on Matsuda’s face and immediately shut up. ‘Idiot’ he thought to himself, ‘they just started getting over the whole mass murderer thing and then you go right ahead and remind them of it’. 

Figuring out the best way forward is the truth, Light decided to run with it. “Look I’m, I’m sorry” he stammered, “I didn’t mean to scare you I just haven’t mentally been around for a long time. While I’m technically twenty three years old, my last memory where i was in full control of my life, is bending down to pick up the notebook six years ago. Oh and the couple of months that I gave up the Death Note” he quickly amended. 

Near glared at him suspiciously. Light couldn’t see or feel the presence any more but that didn’t mean it wasn’t there, just waiting for a chance to reveal itself. “Well that sounds like a lie Light Yagami” he remarked in his monosyllabic voice, a note of triumph there. “The Guardian informed us that you had had all your memories from your time as Kira restored to you. If that’s the case then you should be all mentally” he put some emphasis on the last two words “Caught Up”. 

Light noticed Near was playing with his toys again, and he couldn't help but notice that the toy with the word Kira on it was being squashed by Near almost like a stress ball. 

Light took a deep breath. He needed to carry on playing this carefully until he knew if he was currently dealing with Near or the corruption. “Imagine if you saw a movie about a famous event” he explained, keeping his voice calm and under control. “Imagine it was a massive movie that covered every single aspect and event of that momentous time in history. Now after you’ve seen that movie, while you know everything that happened, it’s still not even close to living through the actual event, isn't that right?” 

Near and Aizawa still didn’t look moved at all but Light could see he was starting to get through to the others. “You need to understand that as far as my mind goes the last few years didn’t happen. I woke up only a few hours ago watching the darkness and the light battling it out in front of me.”

An idea came to Light although he wasn’t sure if he could pull it off. Grasping The Book of Life he reached into his mind and drew on the memory of himself in the alternate dimension where he had witnessed the titanic battle of Light and Dark and opened his palm. He could feel himself drawing on the power of the book and after a few false starts, the memory bubble grew, hovering over his palm. 

Light beckoned everyone over and they all came forward with curious expressions on their face, even Near looked interested. 

As they watched the memory Light could see the sympathy growing on their faces especially Matsuda who had tears pouring down his face as he watched the part where Light absorbed all of Kira’s memories, and the pain that they caused him. 

They all gasped at the part where L appeared to Light, and Light who had been watching Near like a hawk this entire time, saw him shake his head as if waking from a dream and stare with such longing at his mentor, that Light knew that for a second, whatever had had control of him had lost it for just a minute. . 

Then as the memory ended with L telling Light he would see him again, the sneer came back on Nears face and Light knew the corruption had taken him again, even though he still couldn’t feel or see it. He glanced over at Aizawa wondering how he was feeling but Aizawa’s expression was closed and Light had a sinking feeling he still wasn't moved to Light’s position. 

Light closed his hand around the memory and turned to everyone in the warehouse. “I know this in no way makes up for everything I, as Kira, put you all through, but I hope you can learn to forgive me for everything that happened. I still remember how close we all were" he said, speaking to the Kira Task Force members, "especially during my more lucid times and I would hate to lose that.”

He glanced sadly around the warehouse. “I am fully aware that most of you probably will want nothing to do with me, and I completely understand if that’s the case. I can only wish you well and I will make sure you get paid for the next few months until you can find new jobs.” He gave them a rueful smile, “For very obvious reasons the Kira case is now over and I have my own path that I now have to follow.” He was heartened to see that Matsuda and Mogi returned his wan smile and even Giovani, Hale and Rester didn't look so antagonistic. 

Light suddenly stumbled and would have fallen to the floor if Matsuda hadn’t caught him. In a flash Aizawa was also next to him and held him up along with Matsuda. Light realised that he was exhausted, the days events all catching up with him at once, although he concluded, it was more like three weeks of event’s if you counted all the time he had spent in the time bubble. 

Suddenly Near was in charge again and Light was glad to see the hatred gone from his face at least for now. “Aizawa take Light Yagami to the car outside. We're going to want to get him to a hospital to be checked up as quickly as possible. I need you to keep an eye and make sure nothing happens to him.” He turned to Matsuda. “You can go with them and drive.” He glanced at his watch. “The highway will be busy now. Take the side roads and we will make sure there is someone waiting at the hospital for you.” 

Aizawa nodded at Near and Light swore that he saw him wink but he was too tired to think straight, as Matsuda and Aizawa helped carry him out. He felt completely drained and figured that his little trick with the memory bubble had been too much too fast. He made a mental note to take things a lot slower the next time. But at least the hold on Near had snapped for a minute when he had seen L, and this gave Light some ideas of how to break the corruptions hold on him although it would have to wait until he was more lucid. 

As they stepped outside Light winced at the Sun which was glaring into his eyes and realised that with everything that had happened in the warehouse, only a few hours had passed in real time. Blocking the glare with his hand Light stumbled towards the car and, aided by Aizawa and Matsuda slid inside. He immediately laid his head back on the headrest, sleep threatening to overtake him. 

He knew that he should be careful and something was niggling at the back of his mind that he might be in danger, from… something, but the motion of the car was soothing, and as Light lay The Book of Life down on his lap, he fell into a deep, dreamless sleep. 

***************************************************

Light woke up with a start, what felt like seconds later with sirens blaring all around him. They were surrounded by police cars on all sides and there were lights and noise everywhere. Light looked out the window and stared in horror down the barrel of a gun held at his head by one of the policemen. Panicking, Light stumbled backwards and felt around frantically for The Book of Life, but it was not next to him, and he had no idea where he had put it. He glanced at the floor of the car but couldn’t see anything. 

His mind was still clouded with tiredness and he couldn't think as clearly as he normally would, but he knew something was very, very wrong. The car door banged open and two hands grabbed him by his feet and hauled him out of the car. The hands were Aizawa’s, who had a maniacal grin on his face, and Light barely had time to register it before he was slammed up against the car with his hands behind his back and handcuffs were put around his wrists, so tight, they were cutting off his circulation. 

“Got you now, you serial killing, little fuck,” Aizawa breathed in his ear as he fastened the cuffs. “I bet you thought you had gotten away with it, but Near is going to make sure you pay for your crimes, you murdering psychopath!” He was practically spitting at this point. He suddenly shoved a piece of cloth in Light’s mouth and tied it around his face. When one of the policemen protested that this wasn’t legal, Aizawa told him that they suspected Kira might be able to kill with his mouth and that they weren’t taking any chances. The police officer seemed satisfied with this explanation and moved off, letting Aizawa escort him. 

Light’s mind was now fully awake and he realised with horror that he had fallen into Near’s trap completely. His brilliant mind immediately tried to figure out how Near had had time to organise this, and the answer came to him almost instantly, when he and Kevin had been together in the time bubble. Half an hour was more than enough time to organise this and he had evidently roped in Aizawa. 

As they came near the patrol car waiting for them, Light noticed Matsuda arguing frantically with the police officer in charge, trying to explain to them that Light was not Kira anymore, but as he usually did he was completely bumbling the whole explanation and the officer pushed him out of the way before moving off the other direction. Light followed him with his eyes as went to a very fancy Bentley and as the window rolled down, Light saw Near sitting inside the car. He leaned out and told the chief officer something in a whisper. 

He then got out of the car and Light’s throat fell into his chest as he saw The Book of Life clutched in Near’s hands. But even more terrifying than that, was the presence once again behind Near.The figure of the massive skull with four legs was staring down hungrily at the book and Light started struggling as he tried to get Matsuda’s attention, but with the handcuffs he could barely move and the gag only allowed him to make muffled noises that were easily drowned out by the cacophony of sound around him. 

Light looked back at Near and there was the familiar look of hatred on his countenance although it was now mixed with triumph and he mouthed clearly in Light’s direction. “I Win”. 

Lights eyes opened wide in panic. He had no idea what to do without The Book of Life and in his dismay he couldn't think of what to do next. He could feel the corruption and even see its influence as it amped up and hyped the negative emotions of everyone in the area. The only person who didn't seem to be affected was Matsuda who was now trying to make his way to Light even as he was being held back by at least three policemen.

Light flexed his hands puzzled as he figured that they should be hurting by now and yet they weren't. He put it down to being in shock as Aizawa violently shoved him in the car, inadvertently banging Light's head against the top of the car door, but Light still didn't feel any pain although he could clearly feel the sensation of his head hitting the door.

Once Light was securely in the car Aizawa read him his rights. “The first right is the right to remain silent. The second is the right to have an attorney at the trial. The suspect does not have the right to see an attorney before trial or have one present during interrogation sessions. If a suspect can not afford an attorney, one will be appointed for him. Of course” he added snarkily, "none of these will be a problem for you.” He gave a final glare at Light before walking off. 

Light watched Near as he clutched The Book of Life to his chest and walked over to Light standing just outside the car window. He gave Light the smile that still terrified him every time he saw it, filled with all the malice of Nears darkest desires and amplified by the corruption. 

“As I'm sure you've guessed by now I have no intention of taking you to hospital or letting you go.” His eyes glanced down at The Book of Life and Light could see a very familiar madness deep in the shadowy recesses of his pupils. When he looked back up at Light his eyes were slightly more focused and he carried on talking. “Now while you might be thinking you will still be able to get out of this, I assure you that is not the case. In just a few minutes this car will take you to the Burakkuhōru Facility.”

Light shuddered in fear. He had heard stories about that place and even the best ones were nightmarish in nature. Near continued. “I already have an execution squad waiting for us there, as soon as you arrive you will be taken and shot until dead.” Light's eyes widened again in horror and Near gave him a vindictive look. “As you no longer hold The Book of Life, it will not be able to heal you and you will die the way you should've, screaming in agony and bullet ridden.” His voice dropped to a childish whisper, “I have given them instructions to avoid any vital organs or arteries. That way you can bleed out slowly but surely.” 

Light started thrashing again, screaming through his gag, trying to reason with Near but immediately stopped as he felt the but of a gun against his forehead.” On his left was Aizawa and he looked more than happy to pull the trigger. 

“Once you are dead”, Near carried on, “You will lose your connection with The Book of Life and then it will all be mine!”. Nears voice was taking on the undertones of madness Light was all too familiar with and he was frantic not just for his sake but for what was going to happen to Near once the corruption had fully taken over. The few rules he had had time to glance at had given him a vague idea of how powerful the book was, and he almost fell apart at the thought of it in the corruptions hands. 

Near looked at Aizawa. “Get Light Yagami to the Burakkuhōru Facility right away. The longer he lives the higher the chance that the Guardian will return before we can kill him. Aizawa nodded and called over a policeman who got in the car as well while holding a gun to Light’s head. Aizawa started driving away from the scene as fast as he could. In the rearview mirror Light could see Matsuda finally break free of the policeman, frantically trying to stop the car as it drove off. As they pulled away Light saw Near’s Bently following closely behind. Apparently Near was intent on making sure that the job was finished properly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So another nasty little cliffhanger lol, but I think it's a good ending point to this chapter. I will try put the next one out asap. As always kudos and feedback are life! ❤❤


	11. Executions Prerogative

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light is on his way to be executed by Near and his fate seems certain. Can Light or anyone else save him from near certain death?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is a little bit shorter, but I promise to make it up in the next one which I'm already writing 😊

Light’s brain was working overtime trying to think of a way out of this mess, however he was still fighting the bone deep exhaustion that was sapping away all his energy, and he could barely focus on anything let alone a convoluted plan to get out his impending execution. 

Suddenly it hit him, he was being executed which meant he had nothing to lose. The worst result from an escape attempt would be the same as if he just went along with things as they were. Light’s mind went into overdrive. He glanced out of the corner of his eye to the policeman who was watching him, however he was watching Light’s face intently presumably because of Light's supposed ability to kill using his mouth, which left Light’s hands, hidden behind his back, free from surveillance. 

He slowly started straining against the cuffs as hard as he could, trying to keep the motion as unobtrusive as possible, hoping there would be some give. Initially nothing happened, but then Light felt some give as the metal in one of the bands started bending apart. Light tried to keep the smile off his face as he worked the handcuffs and with a small snap, which was easily hidden by the car's engine, the handcuffs gave way, although there were still two separate cuffs dangling from each hand. Light would just have to deal with those at a later time. 

He rubbed his hands, surprised at the lack of pain, even considering all the effort he had put in to break them. Apparently Aizawa carried around some really substandard equipment, not that Light was complaining. 

Light looked ahead at the road speeding by through the windshield and calculated that if he jumped now, at the speed they were going, he would almost certainly kill himself if he jumped from the car. Trying not to be too obvious he slowly shifted his angle to try get as clear a view of the road as possible. He had to suppress an almost palpable sigh of relief as he saw a traffic light ahead which was clearly red and there was constant traffic going through, which would force Aizawa to come to a stop. 

He kept a careful eye on the policeman who was watching him and as Aizawa started slowing down, Light feigned a look of shock in front of him, which distracted the policeman holding the gun long enough for Light to punch him hard enough to try and daze him, before he leapt for the door handle and tried to rip open the door, which was of course locked. 

Swearing loudly Light tried frantically to open the locked door. He felt Aizawa bring the car to a screeching halt and threw himself against the car door as hard as he could and with a cry of surprise he fell out the car along with the door which had fallen into the road. 

As he got up Light gave a fervent prayer to whoever had assembled such a crappy car, and tore the gag from his mouth before he started running as fast as he could away from the car in whichever direction would get him as far away as possible. He knew Aizawa would be right behind him, and indeed he could hear feet pounding behind him, although Light seemed to be outdistancing him with a surprising amount of ease. Light almost thought he might actually get away when a bullet went flying past his face, missing by inches and he came to a screeching halt, staring in terror at the bullet hole in the wall a few feet away. 

A few seconds later Aizawa caught up to Light, and Light felt the now all too familiar gun pointing at his head. Aizawa ordered him to the ground and stared in disbelief at the destroyed handcuffs on Lights wrists. “How did you break those?” he demanded? 

Light gave him a glare and replied “it's not my fault your equipment is substandard.” 

Aizawa still looked confused. “That was a top of the line police issued pair, I've never seen one of those break before”. He shrugged. “Ah well. Luckily I always carry a spare.” He motioned for an unfamiliar police officer to unlock the broken handcuffs on Light's hands and then handed him the spare pair, keeping an eagle eye on Light while the new handcuffs were applied. He then reapplied the gag even tighter to the point where Light almost couldn't breathe. 

He dragged Light to his feet and they made their way back to the car where Light saw the police officer he had punched, completely comatose on the ground. A medic was looking over him, his nose was clearly broken and it looked like he might be a lot more injured than Light had intended when he punched him. He felt a sharp stab of guilt even though he had only been trying to escape his inevitable death. 

Near’s Bentley was parked nearby, and Light could see him watching through the window as he was dragged into a new police car. A surreal image came into Light’s mind as Near was framed in the harsh red light of the police strobe lights while Light was bathed in blue. 

This time there were two officers on either side of him and his hands were cuffed in front of him, which would prevent any further escape attempts. 

Aizawa turned around in the driver's seat and fixed Light with a steely glare. “You’re lucky we’re taking you to you for your execution," he said with a grim smile, “or I would show you about as much mercy as you showed that police officer back there”. 

His voice grew harsh, “Try one more stunt like that and I will make sure you die a lot more painfully than even the execution squad would be able to dole out.” 

Light knew it was over. He was cognizant of their current location and at the speed Aizawa was now driving they would be at the Burakkuhōru Facility in a maximum of ten minutes. Light closed his eyes and laid back. At least he had had time to come to peace with everything that had happened. He only hoped that Kevin wouldn't judge Near and Aizawa too harshly. He could feel the corruption coming from Near’s car behind them and it was particularly dense around Aizawa. 

As they drove up the facility, Light stared up at the stark imposing grey walls surrounding it. The place reeked of despair, fitting for a place that only the worst of the worst got sent to. 

A tear trickled down Light’s face at the thought of his mother and Sayu finding out that Light was dead as well. His father's death had almost destroyed his mother and Sayu had never been the same since. He didn't know if either of them would get through his death as well. He only prayed that they never discovered his role as Kira. 

The dark iron gates rolled open and they drove into the courtyard. As they came to a halt, Aizawa jumped out and motioned for the officers to take Light with them. Light could see the post along with the firing squad being prepared a few yards away. However instead of being taken there he was escorted to a small circumspect building just off the main campus. 

Light was slammed down into a chair by Aizawa and his hands were cuffed to the table in front of him. At least five police officers had their guns trained on him at all times. 

Light almost laughed at the absurdity of it all. He had no Death Note or The Book of Life and was essentially a regular human but they treated him like a bomb that could go off at any time. 

On an elevated dais in front of him were four chairs and Light watched as four judges walked in and sat down. As they were preparing, Near walked in along with Giovani although Halle and Rester were nowhere to be seen. Near was still clutching The Book of Life to his chest and the corruption loomed large above him, even more opaque than it had been before. Light sensed that with The Guardian gone and Light incapacitated there was no need for it to hide. 

The corruption spread throughout the courthouse and Light could see all four judges glaring at him in hatred and knew that whatever this was going to be, his fate was already decided. 

Near got up and gave a brief speech to the judges, explaining in short monosyllabic bursts how they had caught Kira although he left the way Kira killed intentionally vague, completely leaving out the part with the Shinigami and heavily implied it involved speaking and that Light didn't even need a name to do it anymore just to see a face. 

Light admired this stroke of brilliance. There was no way in hell they would allow his gag to be removed now and therefore there was no way for him to defend himself. The lead judge asked if anyone had anything to say in defense of the witness and Light was shocked when he saw Giovani scuffing his feet nervously and he almost looked like was going to say something. 

However Near gave him a glare and he stopped moving giving an almost apologetic look at Light. Light knew the strength of will it must have taken to almost overcome the pure darkness pouring off of Near at this point and he was grateful for it. 

At this time the lead Judge got up and intoned “Light Yagami or as you are formally known as Kira, I hereby sentence you to death for your horrific crimes against humanity. Your murder of hundreds of thousands is the single most despicable crime in Japanese history and your name will be forgotten and Kira will not be remembered for anything except a mass murderer. Your death by firing squad awaits outside.”

He gave a final look of disgust at Light, “May God have mercy on your soul.” 

The trial was over and Light was dragged to his feet after being uncuffed from the table. At least one small comfort came from all this. His mother and Sayu would never find out what he had become. He almost collapsed at the thought of them and had to be dragged by two officers to the pole outside where the firing squad was ready and waiting. 

Light had expected to feel terror and fear at this point but instead he only felt calm. As he was tied to the pole Light sent out a fleeting thought, trying to find Kevin’s mind and get a last second reprieve from his execution, but he couldn't feel anything. Of course considering he was probably halfway across the universe at this time, this made perfect sense. 

The firing squad were doing a last minute check on their weapons while Near was looking nervously up at the sky. He was clearly worried about the Guardian returning, which Light found almost amusing considering he knew the Guardian was nowhere near them. 

As the firing squad got into position and aimed their guns at Light a car came screeching through the still open gates and Matsuda, bless his soul, along with Mogi came flying out, running full speed towards the execution. 

Before the prison warden could give the command Matsuda came to a halt in front of Light and blocked Light’s body with his, his arms outstretched making sure they couldn't shoot Light without hitting him. “What are you doing?” he screamed at Near. “Light is innocent! The Guardian explained everything to us and we know that he is not Kira!” Mogi in the meantime was looming threateningly over the prison warden making sure he couldn't give the order. 

Near flicked his wrist imperceptibly and an entire troop of armed guards descended from the main building. Within minutes Matsuda and Mogi were taken down, in Matsuda’s case quite roughly and dragged to the side. Matsuda was still trying to reason with Near and Light gave him a sad shake with his head, letting him know it was pointless, but Matsuda kept fighting until Aizawa came and hit him in the head with the butt of his pistol, knocking him unconscious. 

It was a good thing Mogi had multiple guards holding him down because he looked ready to kill Aizawa for this. 

With his last desperate hope gone, Light closed his eyes for the final time, waiting for the bullets to tear into him. 

With his mind at rest he heard the warden shout, “Ready your weapons!”

He felt a prickling at the back of his mind. 

“Take aim” 

Suddenly an unfamiliar voice spoke clearly and audibly in his mind “Excuse me, but who are you!?” 

“FIRE” 

Light’s eyes flew open in shock right as the first volley of bullets flew across the yard to tear into his body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I just really love a good cliffhanger. Don't worry the next chapter will be out soon! As always kudos and feedback are life!


	12. Corruptions Last Stand

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Can Light somehow survive his execution, and what was that voice inside his head?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to Hippopi who always leaves amazing and insightful comments and who always helps inspire me to write.  
> This chapter is extra long to help make up for the previous shorter one.

Light could actually feel the bullets hitting him with a brutal amount of force, right before they ricocheted off his body and tore across the yard, one of them almost hitting one of the guards in the face. Light stared in shock, unable to process what was happening. Even Near looked flummoxed and suddenly Light heard a petulant and insistent voice in the back of his mind again, “I said, Who Are You?” 

Light couldn't think of anything to reply with so he just automatically replied, ‘I’m Light Yagami’ and then threw in for good measure ‘Who are you?’ 

Suddenly time seemed to slow down again, and Light could feel the confusion of the presence in his mind. It seemed to have just woken up and instead of giving Light a name he got an image, a magnificent book floating in mid air glowing brighter than the Sun, and suddenly everything clicked. Kevin had said that The Book of Life had a mind and will of its own, although he had no idea why it was only making itself known to him now. 

In the meantime, in the courtyard Near was turning to shout at the Warden instructing his men to reload their weapons, but it was like he was moving through molasses and Light didn’t know if time was moving slowly, or he and the book were just thinking so quickly. Realising either way that time was limited, Light thought at The Book of Life ‘Where were you this whole time? It's been hours since I reunited you with your Death Note!’ 

The Book responded once again with a vision and Light saw a Death Note or rather, the final Death Note flying down from the Shinigami world and joining with its originator. Light saw this happening right as the prison warden was telling his men to ready their weapons and knew that The Book had only regained its full consciousness once it had been completed. Light could sympathise with this. After all he too had just woken up from a very long coma, although The Book had not been itself for a lot longer!

The Book of Life was tentatively feeling something and Light instantly knew it was the bond that had formed between them. The touch was light and almost disbelieving. Suddenly a thought appeared in his mind, full of disbelief and wonder ‘Are you my new “Seyathen”?’ Light had never heard this word before but the meaning came with the thought. Seyathen was a partner, a kinsman and yet it was so much more. It was a bonding of the soul and mind, a partnership of love and trust between a magical being like The Book and a Guardian like Light. 

Light nodded his head and he could feel the bond flare with recognition and relief and he felt the consciousness of The Book settle into the bond and he could feel it revelling in its freedom from its original Seyathen, The Shinigami King. 

This prickled something in Light’s memory, like he was on the verge of putting something together, when The Book thought at him, ‘Wait why am I not in your hands then?’ It seemed The Book had just realized that it was not with Light and as its consciousness settled on Near, Light could feel it sensing the corruption around him. 

Suddenly there was a snarl of such anger and hatred that Light’s mind almost buckled and The Book of Life flared with such brightness that Near dropped it, however instead of falling to the ground it hovered in mid air and Light could see it getting brighter and brighter, and the anger and hatred in his mind was growing to almost unbearable levels. 

Light knew if he didn't do something his mind would snap under the pressure and he seized his bond with as much firmness as he could muster and tried to wrest The Book back under control. 

As he touched its mind everything snapped into place. The Book knew exactly what the corruption behind Near was. It recognised it immediately as its original Seyathen, The Shinigami King! Light realized where he had seen the corruption's vague form before! It had been in the throne room, it was the final fully corrupted form of the Shinigami King. Light also remembered what Kevin had said to Ryuk about the Shinigami King’s involvement with Nears corruption and realized he hadn’t meant in an abstract way. He suspected the Shinigami King’s direct hand in what was happening. 

Light could feel The Book's hatred and saw the reasons why. He could feel the pain as the Shinigami King wrote down the name of one of his subjects in anger and the way he had tried to force The Book to his will when The Book refused to obey him. However it was the part where he tore the pages from The Book of Life that Light felt the true anger stemming from. Each page being ripped was torment and agony to The Book as it was being torn apart and over the millenia that pain and anguish never went away as a vital part of it was twisted and perverted to the will of its owners. 

Light knew he had to calm The Book down before it did something drastic probably destroying everyone in the vicinity, and he fed it all his emotions and experiences of what had happened to him, showing how he too had been corrupted, and how much anguish he went through when he woke up from his long nightmare as Kira. 

This sharing seemed to calm The Book down and Light could see the glow starting to dim a little. He fed all his emotions and feelings into The Book, trying to reassure it and make it feel safe again. 

The Book flared once and then flew across the yard towards Light, who without thinking how he was tied up, easily snapped the ropes tying him to the pole and caught it effortlessly, while pulling the gag from his mouth once again. 

All of a sudden time seemed to speed up again or rather go back to normal, and Light watched almost with amusement as the execution squad were frantically trying to reload their rifles and Near was shouting at them to kill Light, spittle flying from his mouth, but even more importantly Light could see the corruption of the Shinigami King, clear as day now a look of pure panic on the skull like face. All of sudden it vanished and Light panicked, not knowing where it went frantically searching with his mind for it. 

Suddenly he felt The Book of Life open its thoughts to him and Light could now feel exactly where the Shinigami King’s corruption was, buried in the deepest recesses of Near’s mind. Thanks to his bond with The Book of Life, the Shinigami KIng could no more hide from him than it could from The Book. 

Light also knew exactly how he was going to get rid of this final parasite. The idea had come to him right before he had fallen asleep in the car, and going by its success on him he had a good feeling it would work on Near. 

Light strode with a lot more confidence than he actually felt towards Near who tripped on his backside and started backpedaling frantically away, trying to get away from him. He called for the guards to come and help him, and Light smiled as Mogi came and stood in the way making sure no one could get between him and Near. 

As Light reached Near he grasped his head with his hands and forced Near to look into his eyes. And then without knowing how, and powered by The Book of Life, he poured every image of L he had in his considerable brain, directly into Near’s mind, feeding these images faster and faster, especially the ones where L and him were sharing quiet, loving moments together. Immediately there was a reaction and Light could feel Near’s mind struggling to break free however the Shinigami King’s hold was strong and Light wasn't sure if it was going to be enough. Then he felt The Book of Life’s consciousness beside him, and together with Near’s furious mind they forced the Shinigami King out of his head completely. 

Suddenly Light was back in the yard and he could hear gasps and screams from everyone around them and he knew they all could see what he was seeing. The massive form of the Shinigami Kings avatar looming over the entire courtyard. Near had collapsed on the floor from the effort of expelling the Shinigami King from his mind and Aizawa was clutching his head in agony as well. 

Light could feel a command from The Book of Life shouted into his mind, ‘OPEN ME!’ 

Without even thinking Light opened up The Book of Life and pure white energy shot out from the pages engulfing the towering form of the Shinigami King’s avatar. The avatar screamed in agony and Light could see cracks of Light forming all along its visage. It managed to hold together for a few seconds before it disintegrated into little pieces, and even those fell into dust, and Light could feel the corruption vanish like smoke. 

Light collapsed to the ground barely able to stay awake and realized all the effort he had put into expelling the Shinigami King from Near’s mind, had completely overtaxed himself again. However he knew he was still in a perilous situation and until he could wake up Near and hopefully get him to help his situation, he was not out of the woods yet. 

While he may be bulletproof apparently, and had massive strength he still didn't fancy his odds against the entire japanese government. 

Light forced himself to get up and made his way to Near who was still comatose on the ground. He felt for a pulse and thanked his lucky stars when he found one. Nears’ heartbeat was strong and Light gave a sigh of relief although he had no idea how Near would react when he woke up. He had a bad feeling that even though Near was now free of the influence of the Shinigami King he would still be extremely reluctant to let Light go. 

He had no choice but to wait and hope he could reason with the young savant. He noticed that the majority of the guards were still looking shell shocked at the events that happened and he imagined that for the people who hadn’t been working with Death Notes and Shinigami’s for the last few years, this revelation must have been mind blowing. 

Near gave a groan and slowly opened his eyes. He looked at Light with confusion written all over his face which only grew as he looked around the courtyard, and Light realized that his link to Near’s mind was still open, and he could see Near’s thoughts clearly. Near had no idea where he was or how he got there, the last thing he remembered was being in the warehouse, meeting the Guardian and then the Guardian and Light vanishing into the time bubble. From there everything was blank and Light knew the Shinigami KIng’s corruption had completely taken over at that point. 

Feeling sorry for him Light used the link to show Near everything that had happened to him up to and including the intended execution. Near suddenly turned over and threw up all over the courtyard floor, and Light could feel his disgust and revulsion although ironically in this case it was more about him losing control and being a puppet for a foriegn entity than anything else. The missing time period was also severely troubling him and as the Shinigami King's avatar had been destroyed, his memories were gone with it. 

The connection started fading but Light was losing some of the sympathy he was feeling for Near who clearly didn’t feel remorse for the harm he had caused him. He did feel sorry for almost killing Light, however this seemed more to do with the fact that L had loved Light than anything else. 

Moving into his standard crouching position and twirling his hair in a familiar gesture, Near looked Light up down in a considering manner, clearly trying to decide what to do with him. He knew Light couldn’t be killed with conventional methods now, and knowing him Light wouldn’t be surprised if he was contemplating throwing him in prison instead. 

Light decided to preempt any of this. “Look Near”, he said trying to keep the annoyance under control, “you saw what the Guardian showed everyone and my role in everything that happened. You alone can testify to everything that occured so that I can be set free.” He gave Near a look, “there are no more games here. There are no winners, only losers and we all got fucked with everything that happened. You lost your mentor that you loved like a brother”, Near got a defensive look on his face and Light preempted him before he could interrupt, “Do not deny it Near, I saw the look on your face when you saw his image in my memory”. Near actually looked slightly contrite and Light continued, “I not only lost five years of my life and my humanity, I also lost my father, and the one true love of my life, whom I will have to wait at least a few decades before I get to see again, on top of which I have to live with all the memories of what Kira did for the rest of my life.” 

Light paused in his rant to catch his breath and came to a halt when he saw the expression on Near’s face. It was one he never would have thought to see on the young man, it was an expression full of longing and even.. hope? 

“Did you say L is coming back?” Near asked, his voice full of wonder and disbelief. Light’s throat tightened and he nodded. A single tear rolled down Near’s face although he quickly wiped it away before staring at Light with his usual blank expression on his face. 

‘How?” He asked. 

Light blinked. “How what?”

“How is he coming back?" The Guardian didn’t say anything about L returning.” The blank expression couldn’t hide the hope clearly evident in Near’s eyes. 

Light realized that Kevin had only told him about L’s reincarnation while they were in the time bubble so there was no way Near would know about this information. 

He explained everything Kevin had told him in the time bubble even going over all the esoteric rules and why reincarnation was the only option. Near accepted this with a surprising amount of ease which Light decided he wasn’t going to complain about. 

“But you say we will have to wait at least twenty years to see him again”. Near sounded almost petulant and Light, with difficulty held back a chuckle. “I know it seems like a long time” Light replied, ”but the Guardian assured me that it will fly by and before we know it he will be with us again”. 

Near was still not mollified. “But if he’s someone completely new how will he even recognize us? Also how will we know where he’s being born, or even when for that matter? Also how is he going to…” 

Light held up a hand to silence Near. “I don’t know the answer to any of these questions Near. I only know what the Guardian told me. But he is coming back, and I know the Guardian wouldn’t be going through all this trouble if he didn’t intend on reuniting us with him again when he does.” 

Near nodded slowly and seemed to accept that he wouldn’t be able to get all the answers he wanted right now. 

It seemed however that he had more questions as after considering Light for a few moments he asked “How can I be certain that you won't become Kira again? I mean you don’t have the Death Note anymore but you arguably have something much more powerful in your hands now.” 

Light sighed. “The same way I know that you won't become who you were until a few minutes ago” he replied with a small amount of snark in his voice. “The corruption is gone Near, from both you and me. All I want to do is go home, rest and see my mother and sister again.” 

He held out his hand to help Near off the ground, who took it albeit reluctantly. “After that I intend with The Book of Life to make this world a better place. Not like before”, he hurriedly added, “but I have a responsibility and power and you know the famous expression,” he and Near both quoted at the same time, “With great power comes great responsibility” 

Light chuckled at the inadvertent jinx and even Near’s mouth turned up at the corners in a childish smile. 

“Very well Light Yagami. I’m going to talk to the warden and the Chief Justice and explain what happened here. I don’t imagine they will be very happy with letting you go but after the revelation of the Shinigami King in front of everyone they will have to accept that there were supernatural elements behind all of this.” 

He gave Light a sharp look, “Are you certain that there are no more Death Notes?” Light nodded affirmatively. 

“Excellent,” Near said. “Then I can give them a full explanation without worrying about someone finding and abusing one of those things again.” 

Light’s senses seemed to have expanded as he could clearly make out Aizawa coming up behind him and he turned to confront the man who had quite gleefully tried to have him killed. He was, in a way, even more nervous about Aizawa than he was about Near. Unlike Near, Aizawa had only been indirectly under the Shinigami King’s influence and there was a very good chance that most of his actions, while being amplified by the Shinigami Kings corruption, were still mostly his own.

His hopes grew even less when he saw the expression Aizawa was giving him. Still full of disgust and anger. He walked up to Near and confronted him, “Did I just hear you say that you are going to let Light go?” he asked incredulously. “Not even half an hour ago you were ready to have him executed and now he will be a free man! What was all that back in the warehouse about getting justice and making sure that he never gets away with his crimes?”. 

Near gave a puzzled look at Aizawa as if he had no idea what he was talking about and Light realized that this must have been during the time when he and Kevin had been in the time bubble and Near had lost his memory. Near confirmed Light’s suspicions when he asked Aizawa what he was talking about. 

Aizawa stared at Near in sheer exasperation. “You know, when they were in the time bubble and you said we had to do something to make sure Light paid for his crimes, and then you explained your whole plan about bringing him here and having him executed before the Guardian could find out". He bent down and whispered in Near's ear although Light could hear him clearly say, "as well what we planned to do after that!” Near still looked completely confused. 

Light sighed. “He doesn’t remember any of that Aizawa. He was under the Shinigami King’s control when that happened. You were basically dealing with one of the most evil beings in existence when you were coming up with that plan.” He gave Aizawa a hard look, “You remember everything that happened when you were with Near while I was in the time bubble don’t you?” Aizawa tried to deny it but his face gave away immediately that he was lying. Near was looking at Aizawa with an almost hungry expression and Light knew that he was frantic to get those memories back. 

Light wondered what Aizawa was hiding as he clearly didn’t want Light to know about the memories. One thing was for sure, he had not been under the Shinigami King’s control or he would not have any memories of this time. 

Near turned to Light. “Is there anyway for you to show me the memories that Aizawa has inside his mind?”. Aizawa's expression if anything became even more panicked.

Light considered. “I guess so. It’s very different from what I’ve done so far but if Aizawa lets me I should be able to share his memories from that time with you.” 

“Absolutely not!” Aizawa exclaimed. Near and Light looked at him suspiciously. “Why not?” Near asked, a hard edge to his voice. Light got the distinct impression that he was unused to not getting his way. 

Aizawa’s face went bright red. “My thoughts are my own, I will not have anyone invading my head especially a murdering fagg…” he suddenly came to a screeching halt and Light knew he had said far more than he meant to. A shiver of raw terror ran down his spine at the slur that Aizawa had almost said. While he knew he had nothing to fear from the man, he still felt dread from the pure judgmentalism of his sexuality, that he had been afraid of his entire life. 

He was however heartened to see that both Matsuda and Mogi were glaring at Aizawa, clearly very angry about the slur that he had come close to actually saying. . 

Near was slouched over in a way that reminded Light a lot of L, however he was clearly looking sharply at Aizawa’s face before saying in a voice that sounded almost threatening, “What are you hiding from me Aizawa?” 

Aizawa was backing away slowly and Near made a gesture and immediately two guards grabbed Aizawa and hauled him to the ground and held him down while he struggled violently to get away before giving up and slumping down, his head bowed, breathing hard.

He gave Near a glare, "You're not going to like what you find in there.” Near didn't seem at all perturbed. “Well Light Yagami," he said, motioning towards Aizawa. Shall we get on with it?” Light was of two minds. On the one hand he was almost as desperate as Near to know what the Aizawa and Shinigami King had discussed when he had had Near under his control, on the other hand he was anxious not to abuse his newfound abilities, especially considering what had happened to him under Kira’s influence. 

Then Aizawa made the whole thing very easy by spitting out at Light, “What are you waiting for Light? Come on inside my head, I dare you!” 

While this didn't fully exonerate Light as Aizawa was only doing this due to his being restrained, it felt like enough permission considering the circumstances. 

Light motioned Near to come sit next to Aizawa before sitting down in front of them. Then after putting The Book of Life in his lap, he laid a hand on each of their foreheads and asked The Book of Life to help him link their minds so he could share their thoughts. Light could feel The Book growing warm and the next minute he felt the link between all three of them form. He then delved into Aizawa’s mind, determined to find the missing memories. As he did this he realized with horror, that there was something else in Aizawa’s mind with them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So what awaits Light and Near in Aizawa's memories, and was the Shinigami King planning something else? As always kudos and feedback are life!


	13. Aizawa's Psyche : Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aizawa's mind is in turmoil and only Light can help him, however first they have to find Near's memories and find out what else the Shinigami King had planned.   
> Trigger warning : This gets pretty dark in some parts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So i meant to post this chapter earlier this week, but I had a kidney stone and that kind of delayed things a little. But I'm all better now and I promise to have the next chapter up a lot quicker. Hope everyone enjoys this trip into Aizawa's mind.

Aizawa’s mind was like a violent whirlpool. Instead of the peaceful grass meadow Light had seen when he was in his own mind, Aizawa’s thoughts were a swirling morass of memories, many of them tinged with darkness and anger. Light’s mind almost got swept up in the chaos and he had to firmly hold himself in place to avoid getting swept away. 

However it was what was in the centre of the swirling vortex of thoughts and memories that truly scared Light. It was a titanic version of Kira! However it was a version of Kira even he had never seen before. For one it was virtually unrecognisable as Light and the only way he was able to identify it was through his stylised haircut, This version was black as night, face caught up in madness and ranting and raving at nothing seemingly caught up in his rage and hatred. 

Light stared in shock. This wasn’t a corruption, it was simply the personification of all of Aizawa’s worst fears and anger coalesced into one being. Light could feel the way it tinged and colored all of Aizawa’s memories. A memory flew by that caught Light's attention for some reason and as he grabbed it, the moment encompassed him, and he saw Aizawa as a young teenager. 

He was standing in a narrow alleyway as he and some older boys cornered another boy, hitting him and mocking him. He saw them yelling taunts at the boy but the one that they repeated over and over again was ‘Faggot! Faggot Faggot!’ Then they and Aizawa started laying into the teen punching and kicking him before finally walking away leaving him a bloody mess. 

The boy watched them go and Light watched with him as Aizawa turned around and gave him a look filled with guilt and sadness before running after the other boys. 

The memory ended and before Light could blink another memory swirled in front of him and Light watched as Aizawa and the boy from the previous memory were standing in the same ally from the first memory. This was clearly the same day as both of their clothes were identical. Aizawa was leaning against the wall and the boy was closing in on him and Light could see him leaning in to kiss Aizawa. Aizawa kissed him back with all the hunger and passion of a teenager before letting him go, panting softly. Aizawa stared at the boy in wonder, “How long have you been waiting to do that Shinichi?” He said a small grin on his face. 

Shinichi smiled back shyly. “Ever since we went into junior high school," he replied, a shy smile lighting up his face and Light stared in wonder at something that he had wanted to do countless times as a teenager but had repressed with all the ferocity of his internal homophobia. 

As he watched them kiss and even start to fondle each other over the pants. Light felt a terrible feeling of foreboding and turned around to see the same group of boys he had seen earlier walk into the alleyway and stare in shock at Aizawa and Shinichi. 

Aizawa saw them first and his immediate reaction was both swift and violent, “Get off me Fagg” he yelled, shoving Shinichi away from him and then punching him in the face so hard he fell to the floor. Light stared in helpless horror as Aizawa turned to the boys who were evidently friends of his and started yelling how Shinichi had come onto him and tried to feel him up against Aizawa’s protests. 

The leader of the boy's eyes went red with rage and he moved towards Shinichi who was staring at Aizawa with a look of such hurt and betrayal on his face, that Light’s heart broke and he could only watch helplessly as the leader walked up to Shinichi and kicked him as hard as he could in the ribs. The rest of the boys followed and they all piled into Shinichi as the memory faded around Light. 

Another memory, this one with Aizawa in the hospital staring at Shinichi’s broken body in the hospital bed, his face a mask of bruises and his arms in casts. He was clearly being kept sedated and Aizawa’s face was so full of grief and pain that Light couldn't bear to look at it. 

The memory faded into another and now Aizawa was clearly a few months older and was walking around the school with the same group of friends he had seen earlier. They were all laughing together and suddenly Shinichi rounded the corner. There were still bruises on his face and Light saw his face go white before he hobbled away as fast as he could. The boys followed him down the hallway all of them including Aizawa yelling ‘Faggot’ and “Sissy” at him at the top of their lungs until a teacher poked his head outside a classroom door and shouted at them for making too much noise, although he didn't say a word about the horrific slurs they were yelling. 

A final memory, this one was Aizawa at a tombstone in an empty graveyard, clearly marked ‘Shinichi Izumi’ with the year he was born and the year he died. Aizawa was not much older and Light watched as he fell to his knees and started screaming at the tombstone “Pussy” he yelled, “you fucking coward”. The look of anger and pain was almost as horrible as he had seen on his own face when he had been Kira, however there was no one else to blame here and as tears poured down his face Aizawa got down to his knees and started hitting the dirt with his fists until they were bleeding. Suddenly a look of calm came over his face and he got up, brushed the dirt off his fists and spat on the grave and yelled, “Well then rot in there you coward!” before storming off in the other direction. 

Light couldn't bear to watch anymore, fortunately none of the other memories imposed themselves on him. He started skimming through Aizawa’s memories rapidly trying to isolate the ones from the warehouse, however there was so much confusion in the whirlpool of energy and Light was forced to skim through far too many useless memories. 

Some of the more useful ones he saw however gave some insight into how Aizawa coped with the death of Shinichi. He saw him go for therapy, however this was right wing wing conversion therapy and he saw them breed a hatred for gay people in Aizawa, talking to him about how being gay could only make you unhappy and ruin your life. They also expounded how gay people are inherently narcissistic and all gay relationships are doomed to fail before they even begin. 

Aizawa internalized all of this and as he was in Aizawa’s mind, Light could see the self hatred growing, as well as the more outright hatred of all gay people in general. He saw Aizawa go out with his wife and get married, having a daughter, who was the one thing that helped him sustain and work through his marriage. For all his flaws Aizawa was a good father. 

He saw Aizawa join the police force as this was the expected and manly thing to do and the casual homophobia in the police force reinforced all his current attitudes. 

Then the Kira case happened and Aizawa got swept up in the investigation. This helped him ignore the feelings and the loathing that he kept pushing under the rug and within a few months the investigation took over his entire life helping him avoid and ignore the impending issues with his marriage at home. 

And then Light joined the team and everything changed. For one Light’s raw attractiveness and sexuality started stirring up feelings that Aizawa had long been suppressing. And then there was the way L started reacting around Light. While Light thought he and L had been subtle and no one had seen through their subterfuge, Aizawa had clearly seen right through it. It seemed Aizawa had blamed Light for perverting and corrupting L and he still viewed it very much as a sickness. He also had appeared to notice the way Matsuda kept looking at Light and the longing glances he was throwing Light's way, and that made his mood even worse. Light had already heard about Matsuda’s crush on him when Kevin had shared his memories with Light during their time in the bubble but it made Light blush madly to see it from someone else’s perspective. 

It seemed that Aizawa’s internal self hatred and homophobia had started mixing with his suspicion of Light being Kira and the two had melded together to form a toxic mix of feelings that was only amplified when Near had helped Aizawa realize that Light was indeed truly Kira. He had felt vindicated in his hatred of Light and even rejoiced internally as Light lay dying on the warehouse floor. 

When the Guardian had come and explained everything and vindicated and rejuvenated Light, Aizawa’s feelings did a complete back flip. He couldn’t handle the fact that Light was innocent and even viewed the Guardian with naked suspicion and wondering what agenda he had. Still firmly convinced in Light’s guilt Aizawa stewed in his anger and hatred. He however felt completely helpless and it was only when Near had called him over to discuss his plan for capturing Light that he started to feel much better. 

Light immediately stopped looking through the memories. He had found the batch of memories of Aizawa’s interactions with Near during the missing time frame. He felt through his bond and found Near’s mind which was surprisingly calm for being in someone else’s head for the first time, although he was struggling against the whirlpool of memories in Aizawa’s head with difficulty. Light felt a stab of guilt realizing he should have checked up on Near as soon as they had entered Aizawa’s mind. 

Near started when Light grabbed him by the arm and Light pointed in the general direction of the memories they needed and told Near to follow him. A few seconds later as Light was soaring towards the memories he heard Near shout out his name and he started, realizing that Near was floundering around behind him having no idea how to maneuver in someone’s mind. Light cracked up laughing as Near did an inadvertent summersault on himself and Light only stopped when Near glared at him. 

Chuckling to himself. Light soared back to Near and grabbed him by the arm and helped steer him towards their goal of black stained memories. 

Near looked curiously at Light, “So what do we do now?” Light glanced at the memories and picked up the first one in the sequence. He didn’t know how he knew this one was the first, he just did. He opened up his palm and the memory engulfed them both and started playing. 

They watched as Aizawa stared at the time bubble, silently stewing in his rage and frustration. Light was almost impressed at how well he kept it hidden from his face. There was no way to hide the thoughts in his memory though. Light could also see things that Aizawa couldn’t and fortunately Aizawa’s line of sight had Near in it and Light could see the Shinigami King’s corruption take hold. He tried to pinpoint where it was coming from, but from what he could see the corruption was already there, like a latent parasite. It must have latched onto Near earlier, perhaps when he had picked up the Death Note. 

It was fascinating to watch though as the corruption seemed to seep into Near’s body, reminding Light of tar sinking into the ground. Near and Aizawa in the memory were clearly blind to it however. Light desperately wanted to show Near the corruption so he could truly understand what had happened to him. The Book of Life flared to life in his mind and as it did he lifted his hands and waved them over Near’s eyes and rewound the memory a few seconds. It was almost amusing to watch the naked horror on Near’s face as he witnessed what Light had seen moments earlier. 

They both continued watching as the next memory kicked in and Near or rather the Shinigami King motioned Aizawa over and they started talking about the plan to subdue and kidnap Light. Light could see Near watching attentively, clearly trying to see how his infected version was acting. While the differences were subtle they were also easy to see when you looked for them. Shinigami-King-Near was much more straight in his posture and he didn’t twirl the lock of hair the way Near did. Also the way he spoke was harsher and more baritone then Near’s more quiet and monotonous way of talking. 

It was right after Near finished discussing his plan with Aizawa and Aizawa agreeing to it that a truly nasty look came over Shinigami-KIng-Near’s face. He motioned to Aizawa and said to him, “When the execution is done and they’ve removed the body, I want you to get the corpse out of the storage room and sneak it out of the facility in your car. It should be easy while everyone is distracted.” Aizawa gave Near a startled look. “What would we need his corpse for? That seems pretty fucked up!” Near gave Aizawa a hard look and Aizawa sighed and nodded his head.

“So what do we need his corpse for then, and don’t give me that look” he exclaimed at Near who was still giving Aizawa his hard stare, “If I’m going to put my career on the line for this I want to know what it's about”. 

Near looked down and replied “Think about it. If we just let Lights name be forgotten, then the legend of Kira lives on in all its infamy.” Nears face took on a hungry cast. “However if we display his corpse publicly along with conclusive proof that he was Kira, then it will be shown that he was nothing more than a loser. A pathetic God wannabe and it will destroy Light and Kira’s name forever.”

Aizawa looked a little uncomfortable. “Can’t we just take some pictures and leak them to the press?” he asked, "Surely that would be enough without risking my job.”

Near shook his head and his expression was angry. “Don’t you get it?” He asked. “If all we do is leak some pictures then they can easily be dismissed as fakes or conspiracies. However if we leave an actual corpse on the scene, then no one will be able to dismiss that.” The look on Nears face was almost grotesque in its leering facade and Light couldn’t understand how Aizawa did not see that something was off with Near when he had that expression. 

“Then when he has been exposed as the fake Kira I will finally be able to move onto my next victim” he added with an almost gleeful look on his face. When he saw the weird look Aizawa was giving he quickly said, “I mean next culprit”. Aizawa looked mollified. Then Aizawa’s gave a dark grin in Near’s direction. “You know what would really sell the whole thing? What if we filmed the entire execution. I mean you saw how he reacted when he was shot the first time, he was pathetic and crying for his life. We can leak that to some tabloid and that video along with the corpse will completely sell the whole thing!” 

Near looked at Aizawa with a look of respect. “That is actually a brilliant idea”, he said. “It will completely destroy any misconceptions about him dying bravely and no one's going to make a martyr out of someone who’s crying like a baby before he gets executed.”

A troubled look came over Aizawa’s face. “What if he doesn’t act like he did the last time? I mean he’s not Kira anymore.” Shinigami-King-Near gave a low chuckle. “Just because he’s not bonded with the Death Note anymore doesn’t change who he is. I can almost guarantee he will beg and plead for his life. And even if he doesn’t we will still have evidence of him dying slowly and in agony.”

Had Light been in his physical body he might have thrown up at this point. The things they were talking about, had they come to pass, would have destroyed him and even worse it would have destroyed his mother and Sayu. He knew they would have never recovered from such a brutal and total attack on their son and brother. His hatred of the Shinigami King grew a thousand fold and Light was determined to confront him alongside Kevin when he went to their world. 

Light glanced at Near to see how he was reacting to these memories. His expression was almost blank but Light could see his mouth twitching in anger and as he was connected with Near’s mind he could feel the rage roiling off of him. What he was angry at exactly was a little harder to define. Light wasn’t sure if it was the pure injustice and vindictiveness of what they were planning or if it was the fact that he was being controlled and enslaved by the Shinigami King. 

Aizawa had a nasty smile on his face, and while Light knew the Shinigami Kings influence and corruption was working overtime on Aizawa here, he was still furious as Aizawa clearly wanted for all this to happen. 

A few minutes went by and they slipped into another memory. This time Aizawa was second guessing his and Near’s plan, clearly very concerned with what would happen if Kevin caught them killing his newly minted Guardian. Light watched in awe as Near brilliantly manipulated Aizawa into doing exactly what he wanted. They also discussed Matsuda’s crush on Light and he felt himself blushing again, when Aizawa casually in one sentence called Light, L and Matsuda a fag. Light didn’t realize he was growling in anger until he heard the sound and couldn’t make out where it was coming from. 

Near looked extremely uncomfortable as his doppelgänger defended his mentor, however doing so by proclaiming that L couldn’t be a fag, and seeming to grow extremely agitated at this possibility. 

Light stared at Near puzzled. WIth all of Near’s childishness he never thought of him as homophobic and the corruption was only supposed to bring out the worst parts of you. 

The memory ended with Shinigami-King-Near telling Matsuda to go get ready to take Light to the car. Before the next one could start, the real Near asked Light to pause the memory. He seemed to almost be agitated.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I never meant to go as deep a dive into Aizawa's mind as I did here, but I loved the opportunity to go headfirst into the psyche and memories of someone with a traumatic past. As always kudos and feedback are life.


	14. Aizawa's Psyche : Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light gets more than he thought he would from Near, and he discovers even more of Aizawa's dark past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for your patience everyone. I'm actually writing another story at the same time in the Death Note AU, but this one is crossover between Death Note and Lucifer. It is a hell of a lot more sexual then The Book of Life (at least for now) and if your a fan of Lucifer I think you'll like my take on it. I still intend to try put out a chapter a week on The Book of Life though!

Light stopped the memories and watched as Near, twisting his usual lock of hair, looked up at Light with an embarrassed look on his face. “Just so you know Light Yagami'', he said almost defensively, “I'm not homophobic. I always suspected my mentor to have feelings for other men but… “Near trailed off uncomfortably and then carried on speaking a bit more assuredly. “Before I came to Whammy’s house I was raised in a fundamentalist Christian home. They used to beat me and try to scare the fear of the Lord into me at every opportunity. The fact that I was a genius and very feminine looking especially as a child, brought out the worst in my father. He claimed that I was -” Near almost whispered here - “a faggot”, he rushed on, “and tried to beat it out of me. When I tried to reason with him he only beat me harder.” Light tried to hold his emotions in check but he was not doing a very good job and he could feel raw anger and rage pounding through him at what Near’s father had done to Near as a child. 

“When they realized they couldn't beat the intelligence out of me they resorted to more extreme measures.” He lifted up his shirt a little and even though this was his mental projection Light could still see what were clearly burns, from cigarettes perhaps, on Nears torso. Near quickly pushed down the shirt and Light knowing they were in Aizawa’s mind, and not wanting to damage it with his rage, forced himself to calm down, and carried on listening to Near’s story. 

“I used to specifically wait until everyone was done with gym class to shower so no one would see these burns. My father was very good at placing them where clothes would always hide them, and my embarrassment and fear always prevented me from showing them to anyone. One day I snuck into the shower long after everyone had left and one of the teachers who was suspicious of why I never showered with the other boys, stayed behind and watched me go into the shower. When she saw the burns she immediately went to the principal who reported my parents to the police.” 

Light who was watching Near in fascination and horror saw the pain and hurt in Near’s eyes even as his expression remained stoic and blank. Light knew that he himself was not doing a good job of holding his emotions in place and could feel the rage blazing on his face at the sheer injustice of it all. He was starting to get a good idea of how Kira had so easily hijacked his ideals and perverted them. Light had an almost overwhelming desire to see justice done on people who committed evil, and realized that he would have to keep this severely in check once he started using The Book of Life. The last thing he needed was to turn back into Kira because he let his sense of fair play get away from him. 

Near carried on. “I’m embarrassed to say that even with everything that my parent put me through, when the foster services came to collect me I started screaming and crying about how I didn’t want to be taken away from them. The thought of being removed from the only life I ever knew, as bad as it was, terrified me and they had to sedate me before they could take me out of there.” 

Light had cried enough to last a lifetime in the last day but he could feel tears pouring down his cheeks and he knew in the real world he was crying as well. “It was about three weeks later when Watari found me in an orphanage.” Light felt a sharp stab of guilt when he heard the name of the old man, whom he had grown very fond of during his time without his memories. He had to remind himself forcefully that it was Kira and not himself who had killed the old man.” 

Near was looking almost pensive. “I still remember when he and L” - another sharp stab of guilt - “ came to fetch me.” The memory was so strong and powerful, that with his connection to Near’s mind, Light could see it perfectly. He watched in real time as a frightened little child with white hair, who had backed himself into a corner to get as far away as possible from these strangers, looked suspiciously at a slightly younger looking L and Watari. 

Watari tried to approach him but Near started shaking and trembling. The woman who evidently ran the home went up to Watari and explained that Near had been like this ever since he had come to the orphanage and no one could get near him without him going almost catatonic. She was explaining his tragic past when suddenly L moved forward and approached the boy. Instead of walking up to him L stopped a few feet away, moved into his standard crouching position and stared with his deep penetrating gaze into Near’s eyes who stared back. Light could feel the palpable connection between them and he watched as without saying a word L reached into his pocket and pulled out a candy and held it out to Near. 

A choked sob escaped Light's throat. He was one of the few people who could comprehend how monumental this move was. L never gave away his sweets! Even at their closest he had never let Light touch his candy, and once when as a joke Light had pretended to grab one, L had actually growled at him. Instead of turning him off this had actually made Light fall even more in love with the quirky genius. 

Light stared in fascination as Near reached out and took the candy from L, extremely tentatively like a scared rabbit reaching for a carrot from a human. He snatched the candy from L’s hand and immediately retreated into the corner again. L also pulled out a candy and proceeded to suck on it while keeping his stare locked on Near. The den mother tried to interrupt, clearly worried about the situation but Watari swiftly motioned for her to be quiet. L and Near sat like that for over an hour, only broken by L periodically sharing another candy with Near. 

All of sudden without warning, Near jumped and rushed into L’s arms. Light could hear tiny almost imperceptible sobs coming from L’s midriff as Near cried into his stomach while hugging him as hard as he could. 

The current version of Near who was watching this memory with him was blushing bright red and Light knew he was seeing three things today he would probably never see again, Near hugging someone, Near crying and Near blushing. 

The memory ended but a flurry more came rapidly one after the other. Near moving into Wammy’s house and being inseparable from L. Near having to deal with L’s absence as he went on one his cases and almost relapsing into his catatonic state until a boy called Matt reached out to him and gave the boy another fixed point in this chaos. 

His first meeting with Mello and the immediate antagonism between them due to their competing intellects. Then him realizing that Mello and Matt were a couple. Light watched as Near angrily confronted Matt about him being a ‘faggot’ and how could he do something that was so wrong. Matt’s face flushed red in anger but he must have known about Near’s background and kept his cool, and Light watched with admiration as Matt calmly used logic to show Near how wrong he was. It didn’t happen overnight and during one of their more boisterous arguments Mello walked in on them. It looked like any possibility of a reconciliation between Mello and Near was destroyed as he heard Near call him and Matt an abomination in front of the lord. Matt had to physically hold Mello back from attacking Near and after that things were never the same as Mello made Matt promise not to hang around that “White haired bitch”. 

While Matt refused to completely ignore Near, their burgeoning friendship effectively came to a halt with Mello having an almost supernatural ability to know when Near and Matt were hanging out. By now Near had come to terms with his extreme right wing views and come to see them for what they were, mere products of his upbringing but it was far too late. Mello never brought up his homophobic tantrum with Watari or Roger but by the time they found out L had died and they were to replace him, Mello refused and stormed out blaming it on Near’s robotic persona, which to be fair was partly true. 

Near who had already been retreating into himself more and more completely folded in after he lost both L and Matt one after the other. Matt of course had left with Mello. 

Near had his mask back on when Light looked back at him but Light wasn’t fooled. He could see the pain in his eyes now and didn’t even need to read his thoughts to understand where his mind was going. In every way, shape and form L had been Near’s anchor. And losing him had been a terrible blow, one which had finalized his transformation into his almost inhumanly analytical self. Light had a strong feeling that he and Near were far from being through with each other when this was all over.

The moans in the background caught Light’s attention. They were coming from the Kira form in the center of the whirlwind. While they were technically done with everything they had come into Aizawa’s mind to do i.e. to retrieve Nears missing Memories, Light knew he couldn’t leave Aizawa’s mind like this. Clearly Aizawa’s fixation on Kira and Light along with all his insecurities and self hatred had formed this monstrous being that dominated all of Aizawa’s thoughts and memories. Light knew that if he just left it Aizawa would spiral out of control. 

And yet he remembered quite vividly what Kevin had said about tampering with people's memories. The unintended consequences could be disastrous. Light felt for the bond with The Book of Life and immediately felt its presence. It seemed to be in wonder at all of the memories and experiences of the three of them. Light could sense that the stagnancy of its previous owners' experiences did not lead it to much fresh memories and the combined life experiences of the three of them seemed to almost be overwhelming its senses, in a good way though. 

Light did some calculations and realized that The Book of Life’s extremely limited experience with human thoughts and memories might be a hindrance more than a help here, so he turned to Near. “I can't leave Aizawa’s mind in this state,” he explained. “If I do he’s just going to spiral and we’ll all pay the price if that’s the case”. Near looked at Light expectantly. “So what's the plan?” he said, “Can you fix these memories or maybe just erase them?” Near looked with calm detachment at the scattered memories in Aizawa’s mind. “If he can't remember the last few years then he won't even know enough to come after us.” 

Light blanched. “Absolutely not. I can't take away five years from a man's life. If we're lucky the best case situation is we destroy the last five years of his life and in the worst case situation we ruin his mind beyond repair." Near looked unperturbed. “In that case the logical solution would be to find the root of all his insecurities and homophobia and try to change that memory. With any luck it will cause a chain reaction that will change all his memories and hopefully get rid of that … thing over there.” He gestured in the general direction of the Kira titan in the swirling vortex of Aizawa’s memories. 

Light remembered reading in an article how everyone had core memories that affected their entire personalities. Light knew that if he could locate the core memory at the root of Aizawa’s homophobia he could undo a lot of the damage that had caused this. Of course the other alternative was also true and he could end up destroying Aizawa’s mind forever but months of analysing memories and being inside his own head, allowed Light to see the true depth of the sickness in Aizawa’s mind. It was something that normally would have probably taken much longer to evolve to the point that it did, if it all, but Light had a strong suspicion that the Shinigami King’s corruption had accelerated this state of mind far faster then its natural course. 

Light knew he wasn't directly responsible for this but he was going to do his damndest to make it right if he could. 

Not knowing how to even find these core memories Light opened up his mind. Immediately he felt his bond with The Book of Life flare to life and with it he was able to scan through Aizawa’s memories with intense speed and then he saw them! They were nestled deep inside Kira, hidden within the darkness. Light had a feeling that if he went in there he might never come out. 

Suddenly as if sensing his attention, Kira turned to face Light, and Light knew he was in trouble. The giant entity roared in anger and reached for him and Near with titanic arms, and Light managed to soar out of the way, however Near was clipped by the giant hand and went tumbling off into the recesses of Aizawa’s mind. Light immediately instructed The Book of Life to release Near from the mind meld and he felt their connection break immediately. 

Knowing Near was safe Light flew through Kira’s hands right as they tried to crush him. The flight was effortless and his mental image responded as fast as he thought it. The problem is he was in Aizawa’s mind and this projection held power here. Fortunately it was so consumed in rage and hatred that all it could do was flail around making it almost easy for Light fly down to the base and grab the core memory he was looking for, For a split second as he reached into the depths of the Kira aspect he felt it trying to pull him in and engulf him inside all of its negativity. It was a lot harder than he thought it would be, but Light pulled free and flew back to what he hoped was a safe distance. 

Kira was now shrieking mindlessly and groping at Light, however it appeared it was rooted in place and Light thanked his lucky stars. There was no way he could process the core memory and avoid Kira at the same time. 

Light held the memory in his hand and let it engulf his mind. Immediately he was in a worn down little house in what felt like rural Japan. Light watched a child version of Aizawa run through the house laughing with delight while holding something in his hand. As Light watched him go by he saw it was a small container of lipstick. Aizawa ran to a mirror and started applying it with horrible aim and ended up smearing half his face with it. Clearly proud of what he had done he turned just in time to see a woman, who was evidently his mother, enter the room. She gave an exasperated smile and walked over to Aizawa snatching the lipstick from his hands and started scolding him for using her lipstick, although she was clearly trying to hold in her laughter. 

She was reaching for a napkin to wipe away the lipstick when Light heard a door close and he heard a tired voice shout “I’m home”. Light saw the woman’s face go white and she looked frantically around, clearly looking for a way out of the room that didn’t involve going past the front door. The only thing she could do before the man walked into the room was shove a startled Aizawa behind her as the man, who was clearly her husband, walked into the room and gave her a peck on the cheek before collapsing into a recliner. 

Aizawa’s mother grabbed him into her arms and tried to hide his face and rush out the room. However before she could move a few steps Aizawa’s father's voice cracked “Stop!” The previously weary tone was gone, replaced by pure fury. And Light saw the room grow visually dark, and he watched as Aizawa’s father got up from his chair all weariness gone from his face, replaced by raw anger. He ripped Aizawa from his mother and stared in abject fury at the lipstick smeared on Aizawa’s lips. He turned slowly to Aizawa’s mother and said in a calm but deadly voice “What is this?” 

Aizawa’s mother reached forth with shaking hands trying to take her son back from her husband, “It’s northing darling” she said, her voice clearly trembling, “he just found some lipstick and was playing with it before I could catch him. He didn’t mean anything by it I’m sure…” she came to a halt as he gave her a cold look. 

Then he took Aizawa down and placed him on the couch and crouched in front of the terrified child. “Tell me Aizawa, are you a faggot?” He said in a cold distant voice. Aizawa shook his head vigorously, “No Otōsan” he said, his voice trembling. Light wanted to go and punch the father in the face as hard as he could but he needed to watch this life altering memory through to the end. Light could tell Aizawa had no idea what the vile slur his father was referencing was even about. 

Aizawa’s father continued, “Tell me Aizawa, do you look at other little boys and want to kiss them?” Aizawa’s mother tried to interrupt here, but she immediately shut up and stepped back at one look from her husband. He carried on “Do you like other boys and want to do things with them?” Aizawa, who clearly had no idea what his father was referring to here said, “Well I do like the boys in my class. They’re fun to play with”. He gave his father an earnest look, clearly hoping this was the correct answer he was looking for. Aizawa’s father’s hand whipped out and smacked Aizawa so hard across the face he went flying across the couch. “I knew you were a Faggot!” He roared, all pretense at calm gone. He raised his hand to slap him across the face again when Aizawa’s mother was suddenly there, in between him and the child, grabbing Aizawa and shielding him in her arms. 

Her face had gone from scared to enraged and she turned to her husband and spat in a voice full of venom and rage “Don’t you Fucking touch him!” 

Aizawa’s father fell back, a confused expression on his face. Clearly he had never seen his wife talk to him like this before. “You heard him!” He roared, “he admitted he likes other boys!” Aizawa’s mother didn’t back down. “Of course he likes other boys!” she screamed back, “he’s a seven year old child for god's sakes! They’re his friends!” 

Aizawa’s father pointed at his son's face, “Then why does he have lipstick on him!” He shouted back, “Normal boys don’t wear that stuff!”. Aizawa’s mothers return look could have frozen ice. “He’s a little boy” she replied, her voice as cold as her face, “He likes to play around with my things sometimes because he’s bored at home.” Her voice took on a more conciliatory tone, “it means nothing Akihiro” she said, calming down. “It’s nothing more than child’s play”. Akihiro stared at her for a long moment still breathing hard before replying, “Fine, but if i ever catch him doing shit like that again, I won't hold back”. The look he gave Aizawa was filled was pure contempt. “I will not have a queer in my house. If necessary I will beat it out of him”. 

Aizawa’s mother quickly motioned Aizawa to go to his bedroom, where Light and the memory followed him. Aizawa sat on his bed trembling and crying, muttering to himself over and over again, ‘I’m not a faggot, I’m not a faggot, I’m not a faggot…’ 

The memory came to end and Light was back in Aizawa’s mind with Kira howling in the background, utterly shell shocked at what he had just witnessed. He stared in horror at the tiny, innocent looking memory. So many things made sense now. An incident like this right at the tipping point of a child’s development would have drastic and life altering consequences and Light knew that if he couldn’t find a way to fix this memory then Aizawa's mind was fucked. 

Light took a deep breath and let his brilliant mind get to work. He couldn’t change the memory in a fundamental way. If he stopped the father from hitting him or reacting to the situation it would cause a fundamental contradiction in his psyche and make the situation even worse. His mother on the other hand… Light opened up the memory and let it play through one more time, plowing his way through the traumatic experience with great difficulty. He noticed that his mother never came to comfort him afterwards and from the scans he had done of his previous memories this traumatic incident had clearly been thrown under the rug and pretended like it never happened. 

Idea in hand Light waited in the memory till Aizawa had gone into his room and was laying on the bed shaking and crying. Before he could start his mantra of ‘I’m not a Faggot’, Light altered his mental projection to look exactly like Aizawa’s mother. Then he imposed his will onto the memory allowing him to interact with it. He prayed to whatever deities might be out there that he didn’t screw this up. 

Moving swiftly to Aizawa he knelt down on the floor and put his hand on Aizawa’s knee. Aizawa looked up startled to see what he thought was his mother standing in front of him. Feeling as if he was being guided, Light gathered Aizawa into his arms and held the trembling child as he started crying. After he stopped Aizawa looked back at Light as his mother and said in a tremulous voice “Am i faggot, okaa-san?”

Light took Aizawa’s face and gently, cupped it in his hands and said “I want you to understand something my little Shuichi”. Light intentionally used a term of endearment Aizawa’s mother had often used when he was growing up. “What your father called you is a horrible word for a beautiful thing” 

Aizawa blinked up at him in confusion. “What do you mean?”

Light weighed his words very carefully and continued. “There are men out there, and little boys, who as they get older realize that they do not love girls like most other men do, like me and your father do. Instead they like other men like themselves instead.” Aizawa looked puzzled. “You mean they like each other exactly like you and Otusan do?” Light nodded. “Exactly. Sometimes they get married and even have families.” He looked Aizawa sharply in the eyes and said with as much conviction as possible, “The most important thing to remember is that it is perfectly normal. It’s just as normal and full of love as any other marriage out there.” 

Aizawa’s voice trembled again, “So why did Otusan get so angry when he thought I might be one of them?” Light knew he had to stop the self loathing right now before it could take root. He happened to glance to the left and he saw some X-men comics sitting on a shelf. Immediately inspiration struck. Tell me Shuichi, you love your X-men comics right?” Aizawa nodded trying to see where this was going. “Well” Light continued, “In the comics the X-men are special people, but lots of people hate them because they’re different right? They call them names and chase them and some even try and hit them. Do you know why?” 

Aizawa nodded. “Because they’re scared of them”, he replied. “They’re scared of how special they are and what they can do.” Light gave Aizawa a big smile, “Exactly” he said. “There will always be people who are scared of the special people out there, but that does not in any way make them less special or mean that any of the horrible things that are said about them are true.” Little Aizawa looked thoughtful. “So why is Otusan so scared of” - he paused, clearly not knowing what word to use here. Light prompted him, “Gay people”, “Gay people?” Aizawa finished. 

Light thought for a second. He didn’t want to lie as Aizawa’s father was still alive from what he knew and he had no access to his memories, however he could tell that such a visceral reaction must have its roots in some kind of trauma, but he decided to play it safe. “Otusan was brought up in a time when gay people were viewed as sick and not normal, just like the X-men. When you grow up with enough people telling you stuff like that, you start believing it so much that you can react the way he did.” Aizawa sniffed, “but he shouldn’t have hit me like that. I didn’t do anything wrong did I?” The look he gave was so full of pain that Light had to hold himself back from going into the living room and punching the memory of Aizawa’s dad in the face. 

“Of course he shouldn’t have” Light said, trying to keep his tone calm and as full of love as possible. “The thing is Shuichi, your father is a complicated man and unfortunately I can't stop the way he reacts to this kind of thing. So just for now I need you to be careful about things like playing with my lipstick and my clothes.” It broke Lights heart that he couldn’t fully affirm Aizawa’s identity and tell him he could be who he wanted, but the memory had to fit into his other memories and if Light as Aizawa’s mother was too affirming here, it would cause conflicts with other memories down the road. 

“One day you will be able to be whoever you want and love whoever you want as well. But for now unfortunately we need to be safe so we don’t risk your father getting angry again. But this doesn’t mean I love you any less, ok?” 

Aizawa nodded and Light put him back down in his bed where Aizawa rolled over and fell asleep, his face at peace. The memory faded and Light was back in Aizawa’s mind again. He noticed right away how much more quiet it was. He looked at where Kira was and he saw immediately that the figure was much smaller then it had been just moments ago. The whirlpool of memories was also slowing down drastically and Light couldn’t believe how much of a change had taken place, and how quickly it was taking effect. 

Light watched as the memories settled, still swirling in a whirlpool however this time it was much calmer. Light easily identified his memories of Shinichi and saw how the darkness around them, while still present, was nowhere near as dark as it had been. Aizawa’s mind was almost at peace, especially compared to what it had been minutes ago, and Light knew that at this point he needed to step back. The chain reaction from any more interference would probably only help a little at best and cause a lot of damage at worst. 

Taking one look around at Aizawa’s mind he saw with mild distaste that the Kira figure had not vanished however it was much smaller and far less potent and he hoped that Aizawa would find it within himself to conquer his remaining fears and prejudices by himself. Taking a deep breath Light broke his connection with Aizawa’s mind and opened his eyes in the real world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And thus concludes our trip into Aizawa's mind. I hope you all enjoyed this little trip down memory lane. I've been dying to explain why Near was homophobic earlier for ages now, so it feels really good to write this. As always kudos and feedback are life!


	15. Freedom

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Aizawa's mind has finally been fixed, or at least Light hopes this is the case. However it turns out there is one obstacle left before Light can walk out of the Burakkuhōru Facility and start facing the chaos Kira left in his wake.

As Light opened his eyes the world exploded back into motion around him. Luckily his mind recovered very quickly and he instantly processed what was happening. Near was still groggily getting up from the ground, apparently the trip into someone else’s mind was a lot more disconcerting when you weren’t a Guardian. Aizawa's eyes were blank and he seemed to be staring off into space. Light prayed that he hadn’t just broken the man’s mind, however he could see something happening in the back of Aizawa’s eyes, and he had a feeling he was going to shortly know the repercussions of his actions. He took solace in the fact that if he hadn’t done anything it would’ve likely been much worse. 

In the meantime the warden and the Chief Justice were making their way over to Near, looking confused and angry simultaneously. He was grateful that Near was quick to recover, and he was already making his way to intercept them before they could reach Light. Light looked down at The Book of Life still safe in his lap. He knew that he had no need to protect the book from anyone. Now that it was whole again it was more than capable of defending itself. 

Looking at Aizawa he decided they had a while before the came to his senses so he got up smoothly, his enhanced strength making him jump in the air a few feet by accident as he pushed himself off the ground. Holding The Book under his arm he made his way towards the warden and the Chief Justice, who noticed him walking towards them and immediately took a few steps back with a look of dread on their faces. Near who had been explaining the situation with Light sighed and stepped forward towards them and carried on explaining with his neutral tone as if nothing had happened. 

Light realized that as far they were concerned he was still the monster they had sentenced to death, and were probably scared out of their minds of him walking around free as a bird, likely, as far as they were concerned, looking for revenge.

He stopped in his tracks and let Near talk to them. With his highly enhanced hearing he could easily make out what Near and the other two were saying. 

“What the fuck just happened!?” The Chief Justice was shouting. “What was that thing we saw in the sky and why the hell is he free? She gesticulated wildly at Light. 

“And why are you suddenly so co-operative with this Murdering piece of shit” the warden spat. “Not even an hour ago you were trying to get him killed for his crimes!” 

Near who looked supremely unconcerned at their anger, twirled his finger in his hair before responding. “The first thing you need to know is that for the last day or so, that thing you saw in the air above the courtyard was controlling me. So basically a lot of what i told you was an outright lie.” Near reached into his shirt and pulled out the fake death note that he had, had Giovanni make. 

“This is a replica of something called the Death Note” he said. He held out the note to the Chief Justice who recoiled from it like it was poison. Near sighed and rolled his eyes. “It’s not going to kill you, It's just a replica. And even the real deal couldn’t kill you just by touching it.” With extreme reluctance the Chief Justice reached over and took the fake Death Note and opened it up. She looked with fascination at the row upon row and page upon page of names written in the Death Note before turning back to Near. “So what does this mean? Is this how Kira” she turned and gave a dark look in Light’s direction, “did his killing?” 

Near nodded and carried on explaining. “The main reason the thing that was controlling me, made out that Light Yagami could kill with his mouth was so that he wouldn’t be able to defend himself or explain how he was actually innocent in what had happened when he was Kira.” The Chief Justice gave a disbelieving snort. “Are you trying to imply that Light Yagami was not responsible for his actions during his entire time as Kira?”

Near gave her a sharp, almost angry look. “From personal experience I can attest how these forces of corruption can take over you completely. They totally subsume your entire will and bring the worst parts of you to the forefront and suppress all the good aspects of oneself.” Near seemed to struggle to explain for a second before he asked, “Have you ever heard of a Shinigami, your honor?” She gave Near an incredulous look before exclaiming “Are you asking about gods or spirits of death, young man?” 

Near nodded.

“Well of course I’ve heard of them, they’re fairly tales, myths made up in ancient Japan”. 

Near shook his head. “That thing you saw hovering over the courtyard, it was the avatar of the King of the Shinigami. They possess powerful relics called Death Notes which essentially allow one to write any person's name in the Death Note and so long as you can picture their face when you're writing the name it will kill them.” 

The Chief Justice and the warden were staring at Near, their mouths hanging open clearly trying to come to terms with the fact that the mythical was now reality. “But that’s impossible”, the Chief Justice argued, “I mean it doesn’t make sense! How can writing a name in a notebook kill someone?” Near gave another sigh. “It may not make sense but you saw the Shinigami King’s avatar for yourself. And how else do you explain someone being able to kill at will, anyone they want, wherever they are.” 

She looked suspiciously at Near. “In that case why didn’t he kill you. After all he knew what you looked like?” 

Near’s return look was almost mischievous. “As i said he needs a name and a face, and I was very, very careful to keep my real name hidden from everyone. I don’t think anyone besides the people who were in the warehouse with us today, know my true name.” 

The Chief Justice wasn’t done with her questions. “So where is the real Death Note then? Surely you haven’t lost it?” Light could see Near doing some quick thinking and he replied without missing a beat. “I’m afraid the Death Note has been destroyed and the Shinigami who brought it into this world has returned back to his realm. The Death Notes are no longer a threat to the mortal realm.” Near could say this with near certainty knowing the Guardian had sealed up the Shinigami realm. 

The Chief Justice still looked unsatisfied. “So what do we do now? We can't just let him go” she pointed at Light, who decided that enough was enough and stepped forward. He gave a slight bow of respect to the Chief Justice and gave her his most winning smile. Immediately her cheeks flushed pink and she looked away, clearly embarrassed at having been caught. Light was not above using his charms to help himself here. Funnily enough he noticed the the warden was also blushing which he found strange as he got absolutely no gay vibes from him. 

“Excuse me your honor”, he said in his most formal Japanese. “I know everything must be very confusing and that you’ve seen things today that you would never have thought possible, but everything Near said is true. I was being controlled by the corruption from the Death Note for many years, since I was seventeen in fact, and I had no control over my actions.” Light did not have to fake the pain and the guilt he knew was showing on his face. 

“I only recently regained control over my actions when I woke up in the warehouse where Kira confronted Near.” He gave a small smile in Near’s direction. “Thanks to Near’s aid the Death Note is gone and with it the corruption that ruled over me for the last five years.” He gave a pleading look at the judge. “Please your honor, all I want to do is go home and see my mother and sister again. My life has been torn apart and my father has been taken as collateral damage. You have my word that the Kira corruption has been destroyed and that it poses no threat to anyone in Japan or anywhere else in the world.” 

This was not completely true. In a way Light was more powerful then he had ever been before but Kira’s threat was indeed truly over. 

The Chief Justice gave an appraising look at Light. “Your father, he was Soichiro Yagami, is that correct?” Light startled that she knew his father nodded. Her expression took on a sad tone. “I knew him well. We corresponded on many cases he took on. He was a good man and one of the best police officers I ever met.” Light nodded unable to say anything, his throat all choked up at this touching tribute to his father. 

“He actually mentioned you a few times now that i think about it”, she continued. “He said he had a brilliant son who he hoped would one day join him in the police force and become the best detective he ever knew.” She looked at Light appraisingly. “I don’t think I’ve ever heard a father speak so proudly of their son.” Light almost couldn’t breath. The knowledge of how proud his father had been of him and how he died thanks to the Lights' actions, however indirectly, was threatening to overwhelm him completely. His father had always been recalcitrant, and had never actually let Light know what he thought of him beyond the odd small compliment here and there. To know how much his father truly thought of him meant more to Light then he could possibly have imagined. 

Blinking away the tears that threatened him Light gave a small bow in her direction and said “Thank you Chief Justice for telling me this. You have no idea how much it means to me.” She nodded and then said, “So tell me Light Yagami, how did you become this Kira, and how were you able to break out of its control?”

Light could tell she was testing him to see if he would tell her the truth. From what he had read of her she had an uncanny ability to know when someone was lying to her. Fortunately the truth was definitely in order although he decided that keeping Kevin, and the whole Guardian aspect, out of the telling would be best as she was still struggling to come to terms with the Death Note and the existence of Shinigami on top of everything else. 

He briefly explained about finding the Death Note and how he had felt something creeping into him and then blacking out for the next five years. He left out the part about waking up when lost his memories not wanting to complicate things and explained how he had woken up in the warehouse once Near had helped destroy the Death Note and regaining all his memories during his time as Kira. 

Light intentionally kept things as close to the truth as possible knowing that this woman stood between him and being able to live a free life in Japan. After he was done she nodded and Light hoped that she had fully accepted his explanation. She then turned to Near, “So what do you propose we do next Near? After all we can't just let this situation stand. Some kind of judgement needs to be made so people know the reign of Kira is over.” Near nodded. “Well everyone here is sworn to secrecy about everything that happens here, and considering they have all signed contracts swearing this, we will make sure they know that everything that happened today is completely confidential and per penalty of perjury they will not say a word outside these walls.” Besides" he said with a mischievous smile, "who would believe them even if they did speak?” 

“As for Kira we will tell the public that the real Kira was killed in a shootout.” Light silently chuckled to himself realizing this was technically true twice today. “We announce the body was mangled beyond identification and that he was acting alone with no accomplices.” 

Light froze. He suddenly remembered Misa. While her memories of the Death Note were gone she still knew exactly who Light was and now that he thought about it, with the Death Notes reabsorbed back into The Book of Life it was impossible to know if she still had lost all her memories. 

Deciding that now was not the right time to bring this up Light made a mental note to go to his old apartment as soon as they were out of here and check up on her. Light hoped all her memories were still gone. Breaking up with her was going to be difficult enough, let alone if she had her memories intact. He had absolutely no intention of abusing her any more. Kira had done more than enough damage on that front. 

Suddenly he remembered one other person. Teru Mikami was another person who knew who he was and he was even more unstable then Misa. He was making another mental note to check up on him as well when a hazy memory suddenly floated to the forefront, Mikami stabbing himself in the heart, when he discovered Light was not the God he thought him to be. Light wondered if the pangs of guilt would ever stop. It felt like he was being stabbed each time he thought of someone he had been close, to who had died because of Kira. 

Near was still talking. “Of course there will be many questions from the public not least of which will be how Kira was able to do his killing. The question is do we reveal the method of how he did it or do we keep that one a secret?” 

Suddenly the Warden interrupted. “I’m sorry but if someone goes on a killing spree we don’t just let them go your honor. Surely he deserves the sentence he was given?” The judge gave him a scathing look. “And how do you propose we do that Warden? We just saw him get shot over fifty times and the bullets just ricocheted off of him! We also cannot lock him up as you saw how strong he is. He would break out without even trying.” She turned to Light and asked “Am i correct in all this Mr Yagami?” 

Light decided there wasn’t much of a point in hiding his intent. “That is correct, your honor. While I completely understand the desire to see justice served, Kira is gone and he will not be coming back. And I do not intend to sit as a stand in for his punishment.” 

He debated on telling her how he had other things like being a Guardian that couldn’t wait while he sat in prison but then he paused. He realized that she hadn’t once asked him about the massive white book he held in his hand. Come to think of it neither she nor the warden seemed to notice it. Only Near was able to focus on it and Light realized The Book of Life was actively hiding itself to make sure that no one could see it besides himself and the people it was revealed to in the warehouse. 

That solidified in his mind the decision to keep his Guardian status and The Book of Life a secret. He also remembered Kevin talking about how Guardians are created to stay out of sight and work behind the scenes and he knew that on Earth, that principle was more important than ever. 

The Chief Justice gave him a considerate look before making her way back to the other Justices, who were huddled against the wall, apparently terrified out of their minds at what had happened earlier. Light saw her impatiently gather them into a circle where a very brief discussion happened. Clearly they were too out of it to put up much of a fight. 

She came before Light and, to a look of absolute indignation from the Warden pronounced. “Light Yagami, due to testimony from Near and taking into account the circumstances beyond your control and all extraneous factors, we pronounce that as Kira has successfully been executed, and that he is the one ultimately responsible for the all the murders, that you Light Yagami are innocent and free to live your life.”

“Of course” she added, with a very unsubtle threat in her tone, “If we catch even a whiff of Kira-like activity happening anywhere in the world we will be coming straight to your doorstep.” Light gulped but nodded affirmatively. “Just to be clear your honor, people will still have heart attacks and criminals will still die from natural causes. I cannot guarantee that will stop but there will be no more mass executions of criminals or anyone else ever again. You have my word.” 

“That is fair,” she replied. “Then she gave a small smile at Light. “I have a feeling that we will be seeing great things from you, Light Yagami. I only hope that you recover from all of this. No matter what happened the actions were done with your body and you're going to have to carry that toll for the rest of your life.” She moved over and grabbed him by the shoulder. “Don’t let it bring you down. If anyone can rise from this stronger than ever it's someone like you, Soichiro Yagami’s son!”

She turned and walked back to her fellow justices leaving Light and Near standing with the Warden who gave Light a look of disgust before stalking off back to the main prison building. Near looked over at Light. “Now what?” He asked. Light immediately understood. Near was allowing Light to take charge for now. Light glanced over at Aizawa. Mogi and Matsuda were crouching next to him and they quickly made their way over to see how he was doing. He looked slightly more comatose then when Light had exited his mind, but he was clearly still recovering from the drastic realignment to his memories. 

Light bent down and with very little effort scooped up Aizawa in his arms and carried the man to the car he had arrived in, and laid Aizawa carefully on the backseat. Light turned to Matsuda. “Matsuda can you drive me and Aizawa back to my apartment? We need to get there asap.” Matsuda gave him a quizzical look. “I thought you wanted to get to your mother and sister?” 

Light explained “I just remembered that we have one massive loose end remaining in all this.” He gave him a significant look. “Misa Misa.” 

Matsuda swore. “How much did she know about the Kira investigation. I mean we always suspected her of being the second Kira so…” Light nodded abstractedly. He was thinking back into Kira’s memories. So much of his time with her involved his alternate self and the thought of everything Kira had done pained him. Yes, Misa was in no way an innocent. But she had been more of a spoiled child throwing a tantrum than a malevolent God seeking mass murderer. The question really was had she regained all her memories now that the Death Notes were gone? And if she did what would she do next? 

Matsuda saw the Light was distracted and went quite as they drove out of the prison and made their way at high speed towards his apartment. Light shuddered at the thought. This was Kira’s apartment and he didn’t want to spend any more time there then he absolutely had to. 

He noticed a car following them and knew that Near, Mogi, Gevanni and Rester were in there. He could feel his senses expanding and he was able to feel everything around him within a hundred feet. Light smiled. It was going to be impossible to surprise him in the future. He could hear Near and Gevanni discussing what the future held now that Kira was officially gone and if the team would stay together. Near seemed to think that this was definitely an option and they still had plenty of money from L to fund them. 

Suddenly Light remembered the inconspicuous black card burning a hole in his pocket. While he knew he should feel guilty about spending Kevin’s money like that, Kevin had almost insisted he use the card and Light had a feeling he would be very annoyed if he came back and found Light living in the same tiny apartment Kira had used. But at least for the next few days Light was determined to stay at his mother's house. The thought of seeing her and Sayu again after he had come so close to losing them forever, brought such joy to him that despite everything that had happened in the last 24 hours, he smiled. It almost felt foreign on his face and he knew that Kira had never smiled. He had laughed and grinned with manic hatred but Kira had never known a single moment of happiness in his life. For the first time Light almost felt sorry for the vile entity that had taken over his life for the last five years. Almost. 

As they pulled up in front of the apartment Light turned to Matsuda. “I’m sorry, I realize i never answered your question. To be honest I have no idea what Misa does or doesn't know. The only thing I can say for sure is she is no longer under any influence of the corruption. I would be able to feel it from here if she was.” 

Matsuda nodded and got out of the car with Light as Near and the rest pulled up next to them. Light went over to the window to explain what he was doing here but it appeared Near had already figured out Light’s logic. “Do you need backup for going in there.” Near asked? All of a sudden Light burst out laughing, peals of pure unadulterated mirth pouring out of him. The thought of him flanked by four men to face the tiny Misa had him hanging on the car door he was laughing so hard. 

Near looked completely confused however Mogi and Matsuda grinned at how much Light was laughing. After a few minutes Light managed to catch his breath. “Don’t worry Near,” he replied. “If I can’t handle Misa then I won't be much of a guardian will I?” 

Wiping away tears of mirth he made his way into the apartment followed by Matsuda. When they reached the front door Light knocked praying that he wouldn’t get the reception he expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Light is finally free to start his life again. However how is Misa going to react to everything? I'm going to post the next chapter a little late, as I will be away for the New Years weekend, but I hope to have it up as soon as I get back. Hope you all have an amazing New Years, and may the next year be a crap load better than this one was. Also Im posting my new story, Light Morningstar, today as well. If you like Lucifer and Death Note I think you'll like it. As always kudos and feedback are life.


	16. Misa Misa

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for Light to break up with Misa and start the path of fixing the lives Kira wrecked in his path, as well as return to his parents home again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for your patience everyone. I was away for New Years weekend and then we had the chaos of the Washington riots here. Not gonna lie I was kinda picturing Kira dispensing some justice lol. This is an extra long chapter to make up for the wait!

The door flew open and Misa Misa in her underwear and shirt squealed "LIGHT!” and rushed forward and hugged Light so hard, that if he wasn’t invulnerable he wouldn’t have been able to breathe. Then she suddenly stepped back with a suspicious look on her face. Light saw her taking him in and through her eyes he saw what was shocking her so much. The last time she had seen him he had been Kira at his apex, exuding raw corruption from every pore. A sneer of hatred across his face, and ranting about how he would take down all who defied Kira! 

Now he looked like a different person. With Kira gone, the Light of five years ago was back. His eyes open and trusting again and all the hatred and malevolence vanished . He was also wearing a bright white suit which Light had never worn before in his life. Come to think of it he had no idea how his suit had turned white. He would have to check in with The Book of Life about that. 

Light smiled at her with his most disarming grin and immediately Misa melted. “May I come in Misa?” He asked. “There’s a lot we need to talk about.” Misa nodded and then waved wildly behind Light, “Hey Matsu! Wanna come inside as well?”

Matsuda startled and turned to Light who nodded. It was probably best he and Misa were not alone for what was coming up next. He was extremely grateful to Matsuda for escorting him. The man might be an idiot sometimes but he knew exactly what was going to happen when Light broke up with Misa and it wasn’t going to be pretty. 

Light moved into the lounge and sat down on the couch and immediately Misa jumped into his lap, and started trying to make out with him. Light groaned. This was going to be so much worse then he had anticipated. Fending off Misa, Light managed to make her move over to the seat opposite him, while Matsuda sat on the far side of the couch. 

Light leaned forward and looked at her in the eye with an intense stare. “Tell me Misa, what exactly do you remember of the last few years?” She looked up at him puzzled. “I don’t understand what you mean,” she replied. “What exactly should I remember?” He gave her a sharp look, keeping an eye on every minute twitch and movement she made. “How much do you remember about Kira?” 

Immediately her eyes shot open and she gave a frantic look in Matsuda’s direction. Then she whispered in a completely over the top whisper that was definitely audible across the room, “Does Matsu know about you being Kira?!” Light swore under his breath. Still this didn’t mean she knew any other info. “Yes, he does,” he said. “But what else do you remember? Do you remember being Kira yourself or writing in the Death Note?” 

Misa gave an audible gasp. “Of course not!” she exclaimed. You wouldn’t let me touch a death note even though I begged you a hundred times!” She gave a horrible imitation of Lights voice “No Misa, only my special chosen may write in the Death Note and you are not special enough.” To Lights horror she started tearing up. “What’s wrong with me Light?” She sobbed. “Why am I not good enough for you? Don’t you love me?” This was the opening Light had been waiting for. 

“Listen to me Misa. When I was Kira I was sick. The Death Note infected me and made me do things I never should have done.” He gave her a look filled with regret. “As Kira I used you in ways that were completely unforgivable. There was no love in Kira’s heart for you. All he wanted to do was use you as a pawn and I’m so sorry about that”. Light could see Misa’s heart breaking. 

“But I don’t understand,” she cried. “You’re Kira! Why are you talking about him like he’s someone else?” Suddenly she went stiff and she glared at Light. “Are you trying to use this as an excuse to break up with me?” She looked angrier than Light ever remembered seeing her. Light tried to be diplomatic. “Looks Misa, it's complicated. When you met me for the first time Kira already had taken over me. I actually don’t remember anything that happened since I first picked up the Death Note. All the memories are from Kira and he was a despicable being.” 

Misa was looking even more confused so Light decided to take a different tack. “Do you remember when you woke up all of a sudden and you were imprisoned by L, and you had no idea why or what you had done?” Misa nodded. “Well that’s because you had your own Death Note and when you lost it you lost all your memories. It’s as if something took you over and you can’t remember anything that happened in regards to the Death Note during your time with it. It’s the same thing now. You had control of a Death Note until Kira made you give it up to protect himself. He had no interest in you, Misa, all he wanted to do was kill and you were just a tool for him.”

Misa looked like she had been hit by a truck and stumbled back into the couch, collapsing onto it with a shell shocked expression. Light felt incredibly bad for her. He had essentially told her that the entire last five years of her life had been a lie and that the love, or rather obsession of her life, had had no interest in her. 

With an unnerving level of speed Misa’s perky self was back. “Well I don’t care. You’re still my Light and I will love you forever and ever.” She rushed forward and embraced him. “And I know you will fall in love again with Misa Misa. You’re my soulmate!” 

Light reaction was automatic and firm. “No” he almost shouted and pushed Misa off of him hard enough that she stumbled back. If she had been angry before she was livid now. “What do you mean NO!” she shouted stamping her foot on the ground. “I love you! And you love me too! Even if Kira lied, deep down Light Yagami was in love with Misa Misa!” Light took a deep breath. It was time to come out for the second time that day. 

He walked forward and looked Misa dead in the eyes. “Misa, I’m gay”. For the second time that day Misa looked shocked “No your not! You slept with me! You fucked me all the time!” She pulled down her bra and her ample breasts sprang out. Matsuda’s face went a violent shade of red and he immediately hid his face behind his hands. Light didn’t blink and just stared at her. Misa’s face grew even more desperate and she grabbed Lights hand and shoved it into her crotch. At this point Light had had enough. He ripped his hand away from her and said in a voice dripping with disgust, “Put those away Misa. They don’t interest me in the slightest.”

Misa’s hand flew out and she slapped Light across the face as hard as she could. This was a huge mistake, as due to Light being invulnerable, this was essentially like hitting a brick wall. 

Misa started screaming in pain and waving her bright red hand around hopping up and down and Light felt a mad urge to pack out laughing but he managed to keep it under control, although it was close. Matsuda who had come out from behind his hands dove for a pillow and shoved his face into it although Light could clearly hear the hysterical muffled laughter coming from behind it. 

Fortunately it appeared she hadn’t broken it, and Light felt The Book of Life send out a healing burst to her hand and immediately the pain vanished. Light stared down at The Book in shock. It seemed it could act autonomously when it wanted. He needed to have a long talk with it about that. 

Misa looked incredulously at her hand and then back at Light. Then glaring at Matsuda who was still giggling behind his cushion she shoved her breasts back in her bra and stamped over to Light. “Well if you're breaking up with me then I’m going to tell everyone that your Kira!” She gave him a vindictive smile. “I will tell everyone, including your family.” Light was prepared for this. He had been going over all of Kira’s memories of Misa on the way over and he had suspected she might try and pull something like this. 

He decided to try the nice route first. “Misa I know you must be hurting” he said, trying to sound as sympathetic as possible, “and I can’t imagine how much pain I’ve put you in. But I can’t help who I am. It was something I would’ve told you if I was myself when we met” - a while lie but a necessary one - but you never really knew Light. You only knew Kira. All I can do is beg your forgiveness Misa. You’re a beautiful girl” - Matsuda coughed from the couch and Light could swear he heard the word ‘psychotic’ in the cough - “and I’m sure any straight guy would love to date you. I promise it’s nothing to do with you and everything to do with me.” 

Misa was clearly not expecting this approach. She was used to dealing with Kira who always reacted to her tantrums with anger and then fucking her to show who was in charge. This side of Light was completely throwing her off. For a moment it almost looked like she was going to relent and she even started to grin a little sheepishly, when she froze and stared at Light in horror. “So you two WERE in love!” she said storming over to Light again. It was Lights turn to be thrown off guard. “What are you talking about?” he said, staring at her in confusion. 

She glared up at him. “I just remembered”, she said, “you also gave up the Death Note when I did. Which means you were Light during those few months when we didn’t have our Death Notes!” Light groaned. This was something he had not seen coming and far more brain power then he would normally have attributed to Misa. “So when I saw you and L becoming so close, I thought I was just imagining things, but you were really falling in love with each other. Weren’t you?” 

If she thought Light was going to deny this, she was sorely mistaken as Light nodded in agreement right away. Her hands flew to her mouth, and then again one flew out to slap him in the face. Light wasn’t in the mood however and caught her hand before it even came close. 

She glared at him and shouted “Let me go!” 

Light obliged. And she stared at him, anger and confusion warring on her face. “How could you like him over me?” she exclaimed. “I mean he’s a fugly weirdo and I’m…” she never got to finish the sentence as Light growled and got up right in her face. “Don’t you fucking DARE call him that” he roared. “L was one of the kindest, wonderful and easily one of the most brilliant people I ever knew. And yes he’s not conventionally sexy but he's sexy to me! I tried to tell you multiple times when I was myself that I wasn’t interested in you but you decided to ignore me and I am not responsible for that!” 

He realized he was staring right into Misa’s terrified face and he took a deep breath and calmed down. “Misa, I loved L with everything I had when I was myself. And when I was Kira I tricked Rem into killing him. Kira used the love Rem felt for you and manipulated a Shinigami into killing herself just to get rid of one man.” Light could tell he had struck a nerve here and that he had called this one right. Misa had truly loved Rem and her death had hit Misa a lot harder then she had let on. 

Light grasped Misa by the shoulders and looked into the depths of her eyes. “Don’t let Rems' sacrifice go to waste Misa. Live your life and love someone who can actually love you back. If you force me to stay with you, you will know that it’s fake and we will only grow to hate each other. Let me go live my life and you can go live yours. And in time maybe we can even be friends.” He gave her his most charming smile and Light knew he had gotten through to her when she suddenly grabbed him around the waist and started sobbing incoherently into his jacket. 

After a few minutes of this including Matsuda stating in wonder at Light and Misa, Misa's sobs slowly came to a halt and she looked up at Light. “I’m so sorry Light. I really didn’t mean what I said there. I was just so angry and now I don’t know what I’m going to do.” She looked helplessly around the apartment. “I meant where will I even go?” she asked. “I don’t have any place of my own and..” Light immediately shut this down. “Misa this place is yours ok? You can stay here as long as you like until your modeling or acting career is back on track and then whenever you're ready you can move onto a place of your own.” He stared around the dark and depressing apartment. “I don’t think it’s good for either of us to stay here. There’s too many bed memories.” Misa hiccoughed her agreement. 

Light held her for a few minutes longer letting her cry out her pain, although he did notice how her hands started moving down towards his backside and at this point he slowly removed her hands from him and moved her a few feet back. She at least had the grace to look embarrassed about the move. “So where are you going to go from here?” She asked. Light started moving towards the bedroom where he and Misa slept. “I’m going to stay at my parents…” he paused for a second at the realization, “I mean my mothers house for a few days while I recover”. He paused at the entrance to their bedroom. He had had a life here for almost three years and yet it was not his. 

The feeling of walking inside felt both incredibly familiar and foreign all at the same time. Light shuddered and moved towards the cupboard where he knew he kept some suitcases and started packing away his clothes in his usual meticulous manner. Matsuda asked if he could help and together he and Light packed in silence while Misa watched from the bed. For the first time in memory she was quiet and Light could tell she had a lot going through her mind. Then she suddenly seemed to remember she was in her underwear, squealed and ran to grab a robe to put on. 

Light chuckled and finished packing his clothes. He looked around to see if there was anything else he wanted or needed. Besides for basic toiletries he couldn’t see anything he wanted. Everything else reminded him of Kira and he wanted to move on from that as fast as possible. He was maneuvering the suitcases onto the floor when Misa suddenly looked quizzically at the bed where he put down The Book of Life and pointed at it. “What’s that?” She said. 

Light stared at her. She had been the first person to notice The Book of Life besides the task force and the SPK. “Um…” Light was trying to think of what to say when she read the cover, “The Book of Life”. She looked at Light with a small smile on her face. “It looks like a very long read. But you always did enjoy that huh Light?” Light gave a sigh of relief under his breath. Her assuming this was just a really thick book was going to make this a lot easier. 

“Yes i really do” he said in reply, before picking it up and carrying it with the suitcases towards the door. It was a good thing Matsuda was with him as one of the things he and Kira shared was a love of clothes and it took three of Light's suitcases to get most of his stuff into them. He would still have to come back and get the remaining items but now that he had made his peace with Misa the thought no longer bothered him. At the door he turned to her. “Stay safe Misa. And if you need any help please let me know. I really do want the best for you, and remember you’re a lot stronger than you think. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.” 

Misa squealed in delight and grabbed Light around the neck giving him a massive goodbye hug and if he hadn’t had his guardian strength she would totally have sent them both toppling over. She let go with a smile and ran back into the apartment closing the door behind her. As he and Light made their way into the elevator Matsuda turned to him. “I’m really proud of you Light” he said. 

Light was startled. “What are you proud of Matsuda?” He asked, confused. Matsuda shook his head. “You know for someone so smart you can be really dumb sometimes” he said but he was smiling. “The way you handled Misa in there was incredible. You could easily have gotten angry with her and threatened her but instead you somehow managed to turn a break up into a friendship!” He looked at Light with deep admiration in his eyes. “I don’t even know how one does that!” He gave a small chuckle and Light who was blushing furiously at this level of praise joined along. 

“I don’t think I deserve that kind of praise,” he responded. “I mean it was the least i could do after everything Kira put her through.” He suddenly felt depressed again. “When i think of how he used and manipulated her and others like Takada and Mikami it almost makes me ill. I know it wasn’t me” he explained, correctly interpreting Matsuda’s worried expression, “but the memories are all inside me and I haven’t fully processed them all yet.” 

Matsuda still looked very concerned. “I thought that’s what going into the time bubble was for. The Guardian said it would help give you time to deal with everything.” Light sighed. “It did. When he first woke me up in there I was a mess. I could barely function and I there's no way in hell I would’ve made it out of this with my sanity, especially as quickly as I did, without his help.”

Light paused and then continued, “But it's one thing dealing with the memories, it's quite another to be confronted with the living results of what those memories have done.” Matsuda's eyes widened. “Holy Shit, going home is going to hit you like a truck!” He exclaimed. Light nodded. He had known this all along, and yet he also knew that being at his old house was where he needed to be to start his recovery. He still had no idea what he was going to tell his mother and Sayu. 

The elevator door pinged and they made their way back to the car with Light’s suitcases. They were too big to fit into one car so they loaded the last one into Near’s car. Light explained to Near where they were heading to next and Near nodded. “I will be taking the task force and the SPK to the old Kira headquarters after we drop you off” Near told Light. There’s a lot we need to sort out there and then when you’re feeling up to it we need to discuss what to do with the teams next.” 

Light stared in surprise at Near. “I don’t understand. Why would you want me around for those discussions? I was Kira so i figured that you guys wouldn’t want anything to do with me now that he’s been destroyed.” Near’s expression was blank as always but he seemed to have a slight smile at the corners of his mouth. “I discussed things with the remaining members and we all agree we would be idiots to let someone with your level of intelligence and deductive reasoning go from our midst.” He gave Light an intense stare. “L respected you and admired your intelligence and he has never done that with anyone else before. If L thinks you’re good then so do I.” 

Light was completely thrown. He had not expected this kind of response. Especially from the Kira Task Force. He turned to Matsuda. “You agree with this?” He asked. Considering how badly Matsuda had taken his Kira reveal he was still shocked the man could even look at him, let alone help him as much he did. Matsuda’s returning grin was enthusiastic. “Of course”, he said, the usual boyish enthusiasm plastered over his face, “What would we be without Light Yagami on our team?”

Light waved this away. “Nonsense. You guys are all great detectives.” But Light knew he wasn’t fooling anyone. Being completely honest with himself he knew that there wasn’t anyone out there, even Near, who could go toe to toe with him. Well except for one man but Light wouldn’t see him again for a while. He felt both melancholy and happy at the thought. 

Shrugging off the feeling Light got in the car, turning around to check on Aizawa who was still comatose on the back seat. He turned to Matsuda. “What should we do with him? We can't send him home in this state.” Matsuda glanced behind him and replied, “He can stay at my place for a few days. We’ll tell his wife that he had to go out of town to help with the case and i'll keep an eye on him.” Light was truly starting to look at the bumbling Matsuda in a new light. While his mind was nowhere near as brilliant as Light’s, he had one of the biggest hearts Light had ever seen. 

“You’re an amazing person Matsuda, I really hope you know that. You’re been incredible to me in ways that I don’t deserve.” He grasped Matsuda by the shoulder. “Thank you for everything.” 

Matsuda blushed bright red and mumbled something unintelligible before turning on the car and heading towards Light’s old house. As they got closer Light could feel the anticipation building up, but also fear. He still had no idea what he would say to his mother who he had essentially not seen in over three years but who had seen what she thought was Light only two days ago when she had brought him dinner. 

Matsuda drove the car up in front of the gate and Light trembling, got out of it. He and Matsuda unloaded the suitcases from the car's trunk and headed towards the front door. As they were coming up to it the door flew open and Light’s mother was standing there rubbing her hands dry with a dish towel. 

She had aged drastically since Light had truly last seen her and now had steaks of grey hair in her previously untouched head. While she had the look of someone who had been through the worst, when she saw Light her eyes lit up and she hurried out to greet him coming to a halt though when she saw the suitcases at which point her smile turned to a look of consternation. 

“Is everything ok Light?” she asked. “Why do you have so many suitcases with you?”

Light was completely lost for words. How could he possibly explain everything that happened that led to this moment. Before he could say anything Matsuda came to the rescue. “I’m so sorry Yagami-San. Light and Misa just broke up with each other and he wanted to come and spend some time at home while he gets over it.” He had his arm around Light's shoulder and Light was never more grateful to have Matsuda in his life. 

Sachiko immediately went into mom mode steering Light into the house and directing Matsuda to take Light’s suitcases up to his old room (second door on the left, my dear), and before he know it Light was sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of his mothers tea in his hand, the way only she knew how to make it. 

The emotions that were hitting Light came fast and furious. It felt like only moments ago that his whole family had been sitting here casually talking over dinner while Sayu kept talking about how hot Hideki Ryuga was and how she wanted to marry him. Something that seventeen year old Light had completely agreed with (at least as far as the hotness part went) but could never find the courage to say due to his fear of his parents' reaction. 

Now his father was dead, his mother was a shadow of her former self and the last he had seen of Sayu she had been up and about but still shell shocked from the ordeal as well as her father’s death. Light sat there staring into space as Matsuda came downstairs announcing that Light’s suitcases were up in his room and he had better get going as there were people outside waiting for him. Sachiko thanked him and escorted him out of the house before coming back to the table and sitting down opposite Light. 

Slowly she reached forward and took his hands in hers, staring into his eyes with all the love and compassion of a mother for her son. 

“Do you want to talk about it Light?” She asked in a tentative voice. She had no idea exactly how loaded this question was. The mental fatigue of the day's events hit Light like a truck and all of a sudden it was all he could do to not collapse. Sachiko immediately picked up on this, and after making Light drink his tea she herded him upstairs to his room which was almost exactly how he remembered it. 

“Get some rest Light. You need it, and when you wake up you can tell me everything that happened.” She was about to leave the room when she turned around and hugged Light as hard as she could for a few minutes. Then she stood up on her toes, kissed Light’s forehead and left the room closing the door behind her. 

Thanks to Light’s meticulousness he knew exactly which case his pajamas were in, but he didn’t have the strength to even get them out. Instead he stripped down to his briefs and t-shirt before climbing into bed and falling into the deepest sleep of his life. Right before he fell into unconsciousness he remembered The Book of Life. He had left it downstairs on the table before coming upstairs. Before he even had time to worry about it he suddenly spotted it lying on the table where, not that long ago, he had written down names in the Death Note. He had no idea how it had got there but he wasn’t complaining and breathing a sigh of relief he fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Light is back home safe and sound, but tomorrow he has to reveal himself to Sayu and his mother, as well as come out the closet. Till next week! As always kudos and feedback are life and I try to respond to all comments! Thanks so much for reading!


	17. Reconciliation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for Light to come out to his family in more ways than one. But which one will be the bigger shock, and how will they react?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was one of the tougher chapters to write, as I always wanted Light to reconcile with his family, but I also wanted it to feel organic. I hope I did it justice.

Light got up feeling a million times better than he was going to sleep. He had had a completely restful sleep with no dreams unless you counted the one where he and L had been snuggled up together in their bed in Kira headquarters. 

This of course had Light waking up with a full blown hard on, and with his expanded hearing he could hear his mother pottering around in the kitchen making breakfast, so he knew it was safe for him to do some self relief. 

Light pulled down his underwear and started jerking off, his cock was as sensitive as he had ever felt it and he knew he would soon be ready to blow. He imagined making out with L and kissing his white, smooth chest and that did it, he blew his load all over himself and while he wasn’t sure if it was the fact he hadn’t cum in weeks or his newfound abilities, but Light’s cum shot all over him, massive spurts covering his head and chest and pooling all over his groin, soaking his hand. 

A couple of shots even went into his mouth and Light had to fight back the urge to scream his pleasure at the top of his lungs. Light was surprised how good his cum tasted and he scooped whatever he could off his body into his mouth and swallowed before carefully getting up and grabbing a towel and wiping himself down. 

He slowly opened the door to his room and even though he knew his mother was downstairs, he still snuck into the bathroom as quickly as possible to make sure he wasn’t spotted with cum all over him. 

After stripping Light got into the shower and started washing himself off. Before he knew it he was starting to feel himself up and as his hands roamed down his six pack, Light closed his eyes and started dreaming of L again although this time they were both naked in the shower holding each other face to face and frotting while making out. 

While he did last a bit longer this time it wasn’t long before he was grabbing his cock and jerking off and within five seconds he was blowing his load all over the shower and somehow this one was even bigger, massive steaks of white painting the glass and Light wasn’t sure whether to be happy or horrified at what was clearly a Guardian level upgrade to his cum capacity. 

Light grabbed the hose and quickly washed down the evidence before taking a long, luxurious shower enjoying the feeling of the warm water washing away all the stress from what felt like the last few years. Light couldn’t believe it but as he finished showering he saw he was hard again and knew he could’ve easily jerked out another load, but he mentally slapped himself and finished showering, throwing on a towel. 

As Light stepped out of the bathroom and was heading towards his room, he heard the front door open and Sayu’s voice rang out greeting their mother. Light hurriedly ran into his room to get dressed, anxious to see her, As the door closed behind him Light heard Sayu ask who was upstairs. His mother's excited voice replied that Light had come to stay with them for a bit. 

The complete silence after this statement had him worried and Light grabbed the first thing he could out of his bag which ended up being a stylish pullover and pair of jeans before putting on some socks and hurrying downstairs. 

When he entered the kitchen two very different reactions awaited him. His mother beamed at him and immediately asked what he wanted for breakfast. Sayu however looked at him with dead eyes, however he saw in their depths a simmering anger and he knew that he was in for a rough time with her. 

Light saw down at the table opposite Sayu and tried to start a conversation with her but besides for a brief ‘Mmm’ once or twice she refused to say anything. 

Fortunately Sachiko brought his breakfast a few minutes later and Light was able to lose himself in his food for a little bit and forget about Sayu and what he knew was coming. He was shocked how ravenous he was and he easily went through three helping of his mother bacon and eggs before stepping back. 

As he looked up from his plate Light saw Sayu staring at him, her gaze now had a curious edge to it and Light decided it was time to tell them everything. 

Of course there was no way they would believe anything he told them without some kind of bombastic form of evidence. Fortunately Light had just the thing. Not wanting to give his mother a heart attack first thing in the morning, he decided to start them off slowly. 

However Light was worried about Sayu’s reaction to seeing him, and he quickly flipped through his previous memories of Sayu. They were virtually non-existent. When he was still living at home Kira had, purely to keep up appearances, kept up a facsimile of a relationship with Sayu. 

Once he had left home though, they only drew further apart as Kira came to visit less and less. However that wasn’t where they truly split. After the chaos of Sayu’s kidnapping and their fathers death Kira had taken the opportunity to completely cut the cords from their family. Light realized with horror that except for a brief visit to Sayu in the hospital, he had never once come to visit her or their mother. 

Light felt rage pounding through his every nerve at Kira. Fortunately there was someone he could take that out on, although the Shinigami King would have to wait till Kevin returned. 

Light turned towards his sister and mother. “Sayu, Mom, I have some things I need to tell you.” Sachiko looked at his face and could clearly see the worry that was plastered there and came to sit next to Light. She took his hand in hers and rubbed them comfortingly saying, “Go ahead, Light. You know you can tell Sayu and I anything you want”. 

Where to begin? Light hadn’t thought this through before sitting down, and he cursed himself for that. It seemed the only logical place to start was at the beginning. 

So Light told them about the day he had been in school over five years ago and watched a book fall from the sky and how he had gone out and picked it up. It was at this point he described how he felt something creeping into him and losing all his memories. 

He then explained how an entity had taken over him and started experimenting with the Death Note. As soon as he explained how it worked and his first experimentation with it, Sayu, with an expression of horror and rage on her face shot back from the table, and rising to her feet pointed at Light and screamed “YOU'RE KIRA!” 

Light was startled. He had not expected his airhead little sister to catch on so quickly. Then he caught himself, she was no longer the sister he remembered when he picked up the Death Note, she was a mature adult who had been through trauma that almost destroyed her. 

In the split second it took him to process this, he took in his mothers stunned expression on her face and Sayu’s face who was now staring at her brother with an expression he hoped to never see again. 

Suddenly she scrambled towards the phone and Light, who knew exactly what she was planning dove for her, and did the one thing he knew would stop her, he placed his palm on her head and opened up his mind to her. 

Immediately all his memories flooded into her mind, and Light felt a jolt of energy flowing through him. His mother seeing this rushed up to them and grabbed him trying to pull him off his sister and instantly got caught up in the rush of memories. 

Everything from when he had picked up the Death Note till this morning poured through Sayu and Sachiko, although with great difficulty Light blocked his morning jerk off sessions and his more intimate moments with Misa and Takada. 

After a few minutes Light pulled away and instantly regretted what he had done. The kind of information he had shoved into their minds could have overwhelmed anyone and terrified of what he might have done to his sister and mother, he crouched in front of them desperately staring into their eyes, praying their minds were still intact. 

Sayu started to come around first and Light saw she wasn’t coping, her mouth was opening and closing and Light could see she was about to go into a full blown panic attack and his mother wasn’t far behind. 

With a flash The Book of Life appeared in front of him, hovering in mid air and Light thought at it in blind panic ‘HELP THEM!”

The Book of Life gave a familiar and powerful response ‘Open me!’ 

Light flung open The Book and a warm yellow Light enveloped his mother and sister. The light brought to mind spring and awakening and healing, and Light watched the almost instantaneous effect it had on his mother and sister. 

Their eyes widened and their mouths stopped gaping and immediately a look of peace settled over them. After a few seconds The Book closed and Light watched as it flew over to the table and dropped down onto it. 

He waited with baited breath to see what his mother and sister would do. Initially they just sat there looking at him with stunned expressions, and then he was enveloped in a four armed hug and Light was truly thankful for his invulnerability or he wouldn’t have been able to breath. 

Light suddenly felt his shoulder becoming wet and he looked down to see tears pouring down his mother's face. He let her cry it out and after a few minutes they slowly relinquished their hold on him and Light spoke first, “I’m so sorry to both of you. I can't even imagine what you’re going through right now or what you must think of me,,,” 

Sachiko put her finger on his lips, shutting him up. “Light” she said, “What you have been going through the last five years is the most horrific thing I’ve ever seen.” She was still crying. “What kind of mother am that I didn’t even notice my own son being taken over by some kind of demon -“ 

Sayu immediately interrupted her, “Don’t you dare blame yourself Mom” she said, a note of fierce protectiveness in her voice. “None of us including Dad and myself spotted the change in Light. How could we have? You saw what a brilliant actor and liar Kira is!"

She looked at Light and Light saw that the dead expression was gone from her, instead only empathy and compassion remained. “Oh Light” she said, and she hugged him again. “How are you even walking around right now after what you’ve been through?” 

Then she looked at him with a strange expression. “And you’re gay! How did I not pick up on that?” 

Light suddenly realized he had officially outed himself to his mom. Before answering Sayu he turned to look at Sachiko, however her expression was hard to read. 

He turned back to Sayu, “It's been a really intense time since I woke up”, he said with a shaky laugh. “I’m so sorry for everything Sayu. I know it was Kira but still, with everything you had to go through and you thinking i abandoned you on top of it all…” he couldn’t even finish. 

Sayu was having any of it. “Now don’t you get started” she said with a wan smile. “We both know that you weren’t in control for the last few years. If you think I’m going to let you wallow in your own guilt for something you had no control over you’ve got another think coming.” She almost looked angry at Light for daring to think he was to blame. 

Light couldn’t help but smile at how mature and incredible his younger sister had become. Also it turns out she didn’t seem to give a crap about him being gay. 

However there was still his mother to deal with and she finally opened her mouth. “So you are a Guardian now?” She said, as if trying the word out. “And you were chosen for this over three hundred years ago?” 

Light nodded. “Trust me, I was as surprised as you are to discover all of this. It also means I am essentially immortal and can't be killed, as you saw when they tried to shoot me.” 

Sachiko shuddered at the memory and Light wished he hadn’t been forced to throw all this on her at once, however if Sayu had called the police announcing him to be Kira, he would’ve had no choice but to flee Japan as there would have been no way to keep his secret. 

Over the next few hours and long into the afternoon Light, Sayu and his mother spoke and discussed what had happened over the last few years. Things like Soichiro Yagami’s death took on a whole different meaning now that they knew the truth and all three of them mourned afresh for the man who had been the center of their whole family. 

Light’s mother finally came round to discussing L. She had met him once or twice while coming over to drop off food for Light and his father at headquarters but she had never known he was actually the famous detective. She had always thought he was some bum that hung around the building. 

Light burst out laughing as he completely understood what his mother was talking about. 

Sachiko took Light’s sexuality without too much of a hassle although she was worried about not having grandchildren. Light reminded her that the whole reason he was chosen as an immortal Guardian was because he was gay and therefore wouldn’t have kids. He also explained regretfully that he had no interest in having children anyway. 

He knew this would pain his mother but he also knew it was better to get this out the way now and not give her any false hopes. Fortunately the whole immortal thing completely kept her mind off of this and she had a million questions including how he planned to carry on after everyone he knew and loved had passed on. 

This question actually gave Light pause. He hadn’t really stopped to think about how he would cope with losing everyone he loved, and the thought almost made him ill. But then he remembered that he would still have an immortal family in the way of the Guardian's and he assured his mother that he would always have anchors and fellow Immortals to ground him once the inevitable happened. 

The one thing that he still had no idea was if L would also become immortal as well. Kevin had not had time to explain this one and the thought of losing L all over again removed any happiness he had started feeling at being back with his family again. 

Fortunately Sayu and his Mother were determined to help Light stay positive, and it was with a relentless barrage of food, banter and just catching up, that Light and his family spent the rest of the day, just revelling in each other’s company. 

It turned out that even after finding out everything, Sachiko and Sayu didn’t blame Light for Soichiro's death, and he was profoundly grateful for this. As evening fell Light helped his mother prepare dinner while Sayu sat at the table helping peel carrots and just keeping the mood up with general chatter and conversation. 

After a delicious meal Light, Sayu and Sachiko headed to the couch to watch a movie. Light leaned back against the couch, and felt his mother gather his head into her lap where she ran her fingers through his hair, gently fussing over him like she used to do when he was a child. The last thing he heard before falling asleep was her tsking over how long his hair was and how he needed a haircut. Smiling to himself, Light closed his eyes and fell into unconsciousness. 

*******

When he awoke a few hours later Light’s head was lying on a pillow and he was covered by a blanket. He heard his mother's voice and Sayu's coming from the kitchen area. With his enhanced hearing he could easily make out what they were saying. It turns out that after Light’s father's death and with Sayu still recovering, money had been extremely tight and his mother was looking to possibly sell the house. 

Light could hear the tears she was holding back at the thought of selling the house she had lived in for decades, and where she had raised her children. Sayu tried to comfort her, promising that she would try and find some work asap. 

He then heard them heading to sleep and Light gave a grim smile. Kevin’s credit card was going to come in very handy tomorrow. He turned over on the couch and went back to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this chapter. It was almost cathartic to write. As always kudos and feedback are life!


	18. Celebration!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sachiko is determined to celebrate Light's return to the 'Light' but how will the meeting go between her, Sayu and all of Light's old coworkers? Light opens himself up to new possibilities.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to IWasAlwaysDead, who's story gave me the inspiration for pairing Matsuda and Aizawa together. This is the first chapter without a bunch of angst in it. It's finally time for Light to start living again.

Early the next morning Light felt even better than before, now knowing he had a way to help out his family. He headed to the phone and found his mother's phone book with all her contacts written down. It was good to know some things never changed. 

He also found a stack of letters listed ‘overdue’ and ‘payment pending’. Light started calling multiple companies giving them Kevin’s credit card number and making sure that they knew to charge all future payments to this card. Light spoke with such command as Light Yagami that none of them questioned his authority to swop out the cards. 

It took most of the morning but Light felt he had covered all the main accounts. He knew with all of this covered, the pension his father had left should be more than enough to cover her expenses, with some to spare. 

As for Sayu, Light would have to talk with her and let her know she was to take as much time as she needed to recover and get the best medical and psychological help money could get and charge it to his card. 

Sachiko came back from shopping. She had planned a big meal to truly celebrate Light’s return. It turned out that, seeing as she knew both the SPK and the Kira Task Force members fairly well through Light’s memories, she had invited them all to join in the celebration and to commemorate Soichiro's death now that everyone knew all the details. 

Light thanked his mother for her kindness and then had her sit down at the table and explained how he had changed all her debit orders to his credit card and all her major accounts were now paid for by him. 

Sachiko stammered that it was ridiculous and there was no way she was going to let Light put himself in debt for her and Light had to explain about Kevin’s unlimited resources and how he had ordered Light to use them to help him have a better life. 

Light made it extremely clear to Sachiko that there was no chance in hell he could have a better life without knowing his mother was ok. Sachiko gave a wan smile and relented. She hid it well but Light could tell she was feeling a thousand times lighter than she had this morning, and she threw herself into the party preparations with gusto. 

When Light tried to help out, she shooed him away and told him to get some rest and be ready at seven for everyone to come over. 

Light headed up to his room feeling conflicted. His family life and his Kira life were about to collide spectacularly and he worried about how things would go down especially with Near and his zero barriers. 

Ah well, Sachiko knew exactly who she was dealing with thanks to his memories and Light decided to let her take the helm here. 

It was still early afternoon and Light was not in the mood of sleeping so he lay down on his bed and started reading through the rules of The Book of Life. 

Rule 1 : The Bearer of The Book of Life will use it to maintain balance on their world.

Hmm not exactly very illuminating Light thought but maybe it will explain more as time goes on?

Rule 2 : The Bearer of The Book of Life will never use it for personal gain or benefit, only for the promotion and benefit of his world. 

Light understood this rule all too well. After all this is exactly what Kira had done with the Death Note, although he had pretended it was to make the world a better place. Light snorted . That had been a load of bullshit. 

Rule 3 : The Book of Life will grant its bearer immortality, superior strength and senses, as well as flight. 

Light paused. He knew about immortality and he had very quickly realized his superior senses and strength, but flight? Was he going to sprout wings, or would he be able to fly Superman style? If Light hadn’t already seen the other abilities in action he would have found this one hard to believe. 

Feeling foolish Light put The Book down and stood up. He lifted up his shirt and turned around so he could look at his back in the mirror. He couldn’t see any bumps that would indicate any wings. 

Light shrugged his shoulders the way Ryuk always had when he brought out his wings to see if something happened. Nothing did. 

Sighing Light sat back down on the bed. He would have to try and figure that one out later. 

The fourth rule had Light dropping The Book of Life onto the bed in excitement. With his hand covering his mouth in shock, Light re-read the rule once more to make sure he hadn’t read something wrong. 

Rule 4 : If the bearer of The Book of Life begets a soulmate, and the soulmate desires it, he will join the bearer in being equal in his immortality as well as all abilities granted to the bearer. 

Light couldn’t believe it. He hadn’t ever thought that the solution would be so simple, but if L desired it, he could join Light in his immortality! Not only that but he would share in all of Light’s abilities as his equal!

Light trembled and suddenly noticed that he was crying, but this time it was tears of happiness that slid down his cheeks. The thought of living forever alone, even with the support of his other Guardians had been almost paralyzing in its darkness. However here he was with a real chance of eternal happiness!. 

Light wiped away the tears and carried on reading. 

Rule 5 : Should the bearer’s Soulmate accept the bond with The Book of Life, he will become an equal in all things including writing decrees in The Book of Life. 

Light grinned. He could imagine L being very happy with that clause. 

Rule 6 : Should the bearer and Soulmate disagree on a decree of The Book of Life, the decree will only come to pass once an agreement has been reached. 

This rule made sense to Light although he could already see some spectacular arguments in their future. The thought however made him smile. He would give anything to be able to argue with L again. 

Before he could carry on there was a knock at the door and his mother’s voice came through warning him he had less than half an hour to get ready. 

Startled Light looked out the window at the setting sun. Where had the time gone?

Light reluctantly closed The Book and got up to get dressed. He hadn’t even had a chance to unpack so it was a good thing he knew exactly where all his clothes were. Changing to a simple white shirt and form fitting slacks, Light made sure to leave the top three buttons open to show off the top of his chest. He was going to have fun with Matsuda tonight he thought with an evil grin. 

Light came downstairs to find his mother had already set up everything including decorations and the food smelled amazing! He tried to sneak a dumpling but his mother appeared out of nowhere and smacked his hand, asking what son of hers would eat before the guests arrived!

Light sheepishly retreated to the couch. Fortunately it wasn’t long before the bell rang and Sayu shouted that she was getting it. Light came to the front door to see Matsuda, Mogi and a completely different looking Aizawa standing there. 

Light stared in shock at how different Aizawa looked. Instead of eyes narrowed in hatred and suspicion he looked around at everything with open curiosity and childlike wonder although he did still seem to be a bit dazed. 

Light couldn’t help but notice how Matsuda was holding Aizawa close to him and helping him till they were on the couch together. Light hid a small smile at the sight. He would need to speak to Aizawa though to make sure that he was recovering all right. He did notice how Matsuda's eye's slid down to Light's exposed chest and gave a small smile as the man gulped visibly. 

A few minutes later the members of the SPK arrived. Near was his usual awkward self, although Sayu seemed to take a particular shine to him and doted on him like he was a little brother. Near was so taken aback by the attention that he didn’t seem to know what to do with it and ended up actually being decent company. 

Rester and Lidner were flirting with each other like crazy and they welcomed Light into their conversation. Lidner in particular seemed fascinated by Light’s transformation from Kira, and had a barrage of questions for him about what it had been like to wake up after all these years and how he was coping with everything. 

Light answered her as honestly as he could although he steered away from anything to do with L. The topic was still raw and Light still needed to come to peace with the fact that it would be years before he could see him again. 

Sachiko was the perfect hostess and always made sure that everyone had something to eat or drink. When Light tried to help her she shooed him away, insisting he go spend time with his friends. So Light went to sit next to Matsuda and Aizawa. 

As he sat down on the couch Aizawa flinched slightly although Light didn’t take it personally, as he had been on edge the whole night except around Matsuda. Indeed he had his hand subconsciously resting on Matsuda’s thigh clutching it like a security blanket. 

Light turned to Matsuda. “So how’s he doing?” He asked. “Has he been able to speak since he came to?” 

Matsuda nodded. “He seemed to be in shock at first and initially he wouldn't talk to me or anyone except to say the same thing over and over again.” 

“What was that?”, Light enquired. 

“He kept saying ‘I’m so sorry Shinichi. I failed you!’ He seemed to be mourning this Shinichi person, although none of us know who he is, and every time I tried to bring him up he started crying and repeating the same thing over again.” 

Light sighed. Then he explained to Matsuda the memories he had seen in Aizawa’s head and how much Shinichi's death and his father's abuse had affected him. 

Matsuda’s face took on a horrified expression. Light then explained how he had gone into Aizawa’s memory and tried to counter the cancer of his fathers hatred that had taken over him, although he left out the details of how he did it. He was not risking the important work he had done to fix Aizawa's mind to chance. 

“So that’s what affected him so much and why he was comatose when i came out of his mind.” Light elaborated. “I have a feeling that it will take a while to realign this fundamental change in himself with all his current memories. 

Light could see Aizawa was already looking more and more alert as they were talking and he suddenly had a hunch. Light reached out into thin air and The Book of Life appeared in his hand. Light opened it and put The Book into Aizawa’s hands who stared into its depths with a look of peace on his face. A minute later The Book closed itself and vanished. 

Aizawa looked around and suddenly seemed to register where he was. He looked flustered for a second but then he looked down at Matsuda’s hand resting on his knee and a shy smile appeared on his face. 

Matsuda smiled right back and suddenly Light felt like he was intruding. With a slight grin he excused himself to give them some privacy. As he walked away he could hear Aizawa telling Matsuda that it felt like he was waking up from a long dream, and he really appreciated everything Matsuda had done for him. 

While everyone seemed to be absorbed in conversation Light noticed one exception. Gevanni was standing off to the side looking demoralized. Light headed over to him. 

“Hey” he said, startling Gevanni out of his stupor. Up close Light could see how beautiful Gevanni was. He didn’t hold a candle to L’s unique beauty but he had a classic handsomeness that was hard to deny. 

Gevanni only looked startled for a second before saying “Hey” back to Light. 

Light pushed through, “I just wanted to thank you”, he said. 

Gevanni looked startled. “For what?”

“Well when we were in the courtroom and Near, or rather the Shinigami King was trying to have me executed, I saw that you wanted to stick up for me, even with everything Kira had done. I also know how toxic and overwhelming his corruption was, and the fact that you were able to resist it is pretty impressive.”

Gevanni blushed and shuffled his feet. “It was nothing,” he said dismissively. “I knew you were innocent after everything the Guardian told us. I’m just sorry I didn’t stick up for you further.” 

Light put a hand on his shoulder comfortingly and he felt a jolt of electricity between them. Gevanni definitely felt it too as he looked with wide eyes at Light. Light left his hand a second too long on Gevanni’s shoulder, however he didn’t do anything and he even looked Light up and down appreciatively. 

Light felt a bit guilty as if he was cheating on L, but then he realized that he couldn’t remain celibate for the next two decades and he knew that L would have no problems with him having relationships until they could be reunited again. 

As he and Gevanni spoke, Gevanni opened up more and more about his past. He explained to Light that he had been born in the USA and had a fairly generic childhood, although he quickly distinguished himself as a highly intelligent academic. Due to his love of sports and his intelligence he was quickly fast tracked for police work and rose rapidly in the police before being recruited into the FBI. Shortly after that had happened his boss had asked him to join the Kira case under a very weird child prodigy. 

They both glanced at Near who was still being utterly charmed by Sayu and chuckled at the apt description. 

It seemed that Gevanni had had no time for relationships of any kind due to how busy his job kept him. Light confided that, thanks to his insane schedule as a student and his time as Kira, he had never truly had a relationship either, well except for the one with L which had been cut short when Kira had killed him. 

There was an awkward silence for a second before Gevanni asked “You really loved him didn’t you?”. Light looked down into his cup and after a moment he nodded. “He was my soulmate”, he replied. “The Guardian wasn’t wrong about that, but until he comes back I'll just have to wait for him”. 

Gevanni nodded. “Near told us about his... reincarnation I guess. You’re really lucky Light. Not many people get one chance at true love, let along two”. 

He had a melancholy tone in his voice as he said this and Light felt his heart break a little for the man. He looked over at Rester. “I guess he and Lidner are a thing now?” He asked. 

Gevanni nodded. “They’ve been eye fucking each other the whole case” he said with a wry chuckle. “I guess now that it's over, and we know we won’t die any second, they’ll probably get round to the real thing.”

Light leaned back against the wall and let his fingers brush up against Gevanni’s while taking a drink. “Being lonely sucks huh” he said, with a conspiratorial tone. 

Gevanni’s eyebrows raised as he looked down at Light’s hand. Then he looked away but his fingers gently entwined with Light’s, rubbing them gently. 

Light gulped and he was glad no one was looking in their direction. They carried on talking for ages and Light was impressed at Gevanni’s quick wit and intelligence. He saw his mother glancing over at them a couple of times and Light studiously avoided her gaze, although he could swear he saw her smirking as she went back into the kitchen for more food. 

Before he knew it, it was almost midnight and people started heading out. Light noticed Lidner and Rester getting into his car together and driving off in a hurry. Aizawa and Matsuda left together which meant it was up to Gevanni to take Near home who had actually fallen asleep. It was too easy to forget that the boy-genius was ultimately just that - a boy. 

Gevanni apologized to Light but before he could leave Light blurted out “Would you like to get some coffee sometime?” Gevanni stared at him for a second and Light was just about to curse himself out for being an idiot and reading too much into the situation, when Gevanni gave him a glowing smile. “I’d love to” he said. "How about Tuesday morning. We haven’t started any casework yet and I have some free time”. 

Light could feel himself grinning foolishly in return. They settled on 8:30 at the little coffee shop near Light’s house and Gevanni drove off, leaving Light waving at the car. 

Suddenly Sayu’s voice popped up behind, “Somebody’s got a cruuuuush!” 

Light whirled on her, his face blushing furiously, “I do NOT have a crush” he hissed at her as he stalked back into the house. 

“Mmmmhmmm” Sayu sounded far too smug and self satisfied, and Light decided he was far too mature to deal with his baby sister being like this. However the entire time they cleaned up she kept asking Light questions about Gevanni and even his mother got involved. 

Informing them that he did not have a thing for the hot detective - “Ooooh, he’s hot is he?” Light cursed himself for the slip of the tongue and stomped upstairs heading to bed. 

When he got to his room he flung off his clothes and locked the door but not before he heard his sister pack out laughing downstairs. 

‘Woman’ he swore, before jumping into bed nude. However it was impossible to sleep with his raging hardon and Light cursed before he started jerking off frantically, thoughts of Gevanni making him speed up his thrusts as he palmed the head of his cock roughly while stroking himself in wide, even thrusts. 

It took him a good half hour of jerking off before he was ready to come and desperate not to leave a mess again Light tried something, he flung his body backwards and opened his mouth as the first few inches of his cock slid inside. 

Light stated blowing himself frantically and before he knew it he was shooting his load into his mouth. He had however underestimated how much cum he produced now, and before he knew it his jizz was overflowing from his mouth all over his pillow. 

Cursing Light swallowed whatever he could, at least his cum tasted great, and gingerly removed the case from his pillow, thanking his lucky stars nothing had gotten onto the pillow itself. He would wash the case in the sink tomorrow. His cock was still hard but at least he could fall asleep now. Light smiled to himself realizing for the first time he actually had a date in two days. 

*************

The next day flew by for Light as he started putting his life together. There was so much to do including organizing the new penthouse suite Kevin had recommended. It turns out that it had just opened up for sale and Light’s mouth fell open at the sheer luxury of it all. 

It had stunning wide open views of the entire Tokyo skyline with three bedrooms and a massive, expansive living room with every amenity possible. The going price was 1.5 billion yen and Light knew it wasn’t possible for it to go through on a simple credit card. 

And yet when Light mentioned Kevin’s name along with the unique card number everything fell open to him. Bankers and real estate agents tripped over themselves to help him out, and within a few hours the penthouse was his, signed and paid for in full. 

It also came fully furnished and Light, as a consummate fashion lover, fell in love with the stunning aesthetic of the place. It would still be about two weeks before everything was fully finalized and Light could move in but Light was just fine with that. He needed a bit more time at home to come to terms with everything, before his life got crazy again. 

He also had a conversation with Sayu and he explained that he wanted her to be able to go to the best trauma counselors and doctors money could buy. Just like her mother Sayu protested at spending Light’s money, but quickly relented when he explained how Kevin was bankrolling everything. 

She grabbed Light around the neck and hugged him for a full five minutes as he held her, feeling the process of healing in a manifest way and also pure joy at being able to help his little sister. 

He also set up a seperate account for Misa so she would have funds to tide her over until she could re-establish herself, which she seemed to be doing with alacrity. She had called Light incredibly excited about having booked three modeling gigs and she was going to be singing at the upcoming festival and would Light please, please, please come to support her… 

Before she could get going too much, Light interrupted and told her he would love to come and support her so long as he could bring someone. There was a slight pause and sounding a little more muted, Misa replied that of course he could bring someone and she would have front row seats for them. 

Being that the festival was in two weeks, Light had no idea if he would have someone to bring over but he needed to make sure Misa understood that while he would support her, there was zero chance of them getting back together again. 

As Light climbed into bed the following night he found himself incredibly nervous for his date the next day. It was the first time he would be going on an official date with a guy. He and L had only really snuck around and held hands. 

Fortunately he had just the thing to calm himself down and after another vigorous wank session, which he ended by blowing himself and cumming into his mouth, this time swallowing every drop, he fell asleep without a problem.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have wanted to pair Light and Gevanni for a while now as I think he's easily one of the hottest characters in the anime. Don't worry L is still very much endgame.


	19. Of First Dates and First Apartments

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light goes on his first date with Gevanni but experiences a hiccup. Sachiko and Sayu are awesome and Light moves into his own place.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's first date time! I hope i did it justice!

True to his name Light was a morning person and he got up extra early looking forward to meeting Gevanni. He practically jumped out of bed and got dressed in clothes that were casual, but still classically stylish. He was just getting some water to drink from the fridge when his mother came up behind him and hugged him, refusing to let go until, with both of them laughing, he managed to wriggle out and sit down at the table. 

She was surprisingly discreet and didn’t quiz Light on his upcoming date, but wished him luck as he headed out the door. Light felt an extra pep in his step as he briskly walked to the cafe. 

It was only 8:15 by the time he arrived but Light liked being early, and he sat down and ordered a coffee while he waited. After half an hour Gevanni still hadn’t shown up and Light was starting to have a mini panic attack in his head, wondering to himself if the man had seen the light - scuze the pun - and realized he didn’t want to go out with a prior serial killer who almost took over the whole planet. 

Right as he was on the verge of getting up and leaving Gevanni rushed in breathlessly apologizing for being so late. It turns out that Near had picked up a case at two in the morning which had then called everyone in half an hour later to help out with. 

Gevanni had only been able to get back to sleep at about seven and completely slept through his alarm. He profusely apologized to Light who was utterly charmed at how flappable the normally stoic detective was being. 

Light assured him that it was completely fine and he had just been sitting here waiting enjoying his coffee. He completely left out the part of himself having a mini panic attack. He didn’t need to burden Gevanni with his issues at this point. 

They ordered coffee and breakfast and while they were waiting they started talking. Light was fascinated with Gevanni’s upbringing in the USA, which was so different to the almost obsessively manners oriented culture of Japan. 

Gevanni in the meantime, after tentatively checking with Light to make sure he was ok talking about it, was equally fascinated with Light’s time as Kira and especially his time during his memory loss where he had done a complete one eighty and fallen in love with L. 

While the topic still pained Light, he found talking about it really helped exorcise some of the demons that still plagued him. He was worried discussing L and how much he had fallen in love with the quirky detective would turn Gevanni off of him, but Gevanni only noted how lucky Light was to have found someone like that and laid his hand comfortingly on top of Light. 

Light was blushing but found he didn’t give a shit what people thought about him holding hands with a guy. He had literally faced death twice not even a week ago, and his entire world had been changed upside down and he had become an immortal guardian. This was nothing compared to that. 

They carried on eating and talking for a while longer before Gevanni apologized, and said he had to get back to task force headquarters before Near got annoyed at him. Apparently the kid could throw a passive aggressive tantrum with the best of them when he wanted. 

Light laughed and as they got up to leave he leaned forward and kissed Gevanni softly on the lips for a second. Gevanni immediately leaned into it, and returned the kiss with a passionate one of his own, although he didn’t go too crazy as they were still in Japan after all where PDA was definitely frowned upon. 

Suddenly there an angry cough behind them and they both turned to see a middle aged Japanese businessman glaring at them. “Excuse me,” he said, the derision evident in his voice, “this is a public space, please keep your perverted behavior in private where it belongs”

Light immediately felt his heart plummet into his chest, and even though he knew this kind of thing shouldn’t affect him the way it did, he was still a product of his upbringing which was definitively conservative and homophobic. Light wanted to say something but before he could even open his mouth, Gevanni locked eyes on the man with a look of purest anger. 

‘“Excuse me “sir” he said, his every syllable dripping with disdain, “When i want to get your outdated and fucked up opinion I will let you know. Until then keep your vulgar little judgements to yourself and if you ever address me or my boyfriend here again we're going to have a problem” He then proceeded to grab Light and give him a full blown French kiss in front of the astonished businessman. 

Suddenly there was cheering and clapping and Light looked over, mid kiss, to see a table full of teenage Japanese girls cheering them on enthusiastically, Encouraged Light returned the kiss in full and walked out of the cafe holding hands with Gevanni feeling like a new man. As he looked behind him he saw the businessman, his mouth opening and closing like a fish starting after them, too astonished to say anything. 

A block away they both packed out laughing and Light turned to Gevanni, “I can't believe you stood up to that piece of shit like that. That was awesome!” 

Gevanni wiped away a tear. “Oh please it was nothing. I used to deal with assholes like that in Texas all the time. The places and the names change but the assholes stay the same.” 

He turned to Light. “I’m sorry you had to go through that and on your first date as well” He actually looked a little forlorn and Light got up into his space. “Hey” he said, authoritatively, “It's not your fault that there are pieces of garbage out there, and that was the best kiss I’ve ever had, not that I’ve kissed too many or rather any guys” he added with an awkward laugh. 

Gevanni grabbed him by the chin and pulled him in for another gentle kiss. “If it's any consolation” he said, “Your fucking amazing at it.” 

“Oh and I’m sorry about calling you my boyfriend back there" he added, "I know it’s too soon and were still seeing where this goes, but I just wanted to rub it in his face if you know what I mean.” He almost looked embarrassed but Light found it utterly adorable and grabbed his hands and kissed him again. 

“Don’t even think about it” he said dismissively. “It's definitely a little early to define what we are but if you want to call me your boyfriend I’m perfectly fine with that.” 

Gevanni kissed him back and then the two split up, Light headed back home and Gevanni went to headquarters. Light knew he needed a break but he felt an urge to go to headquarters and find out what Near had found so interesting, but he shook it off. He still had a lot to do and he was supposed to be resting, Goddamnit! 

It was about half way back to the house that Light’s senses started going haywire. He could feel danger in the immediate vicinity and he whirled around trying to spot it. The street was quiet however, and there was only a hunched over man heading in his direction who then walked right past him. 

He seemed to be ignoring Light who couldn’t shake the feeling of danger. As he turned around to see where the man was heading, the stranger whirled around holding a knife in his hand. It was the businessman from the cafe! 

“I'll teach you to embarrass me in public, faggot!” he hissed as he thrust the knife right at Light's stomach. Light reflexively tried to block the blow, but his shock had made him react too late and the knife easily hit his stomach... and then promptly bounced right off his immortal body. The businessman stared in shock at Light and then rushed forward again trying to stab Light in the neck this time. 

However this time Light was more than prepared. He easily caught the man’s wrist in his hand and in anger grabbed far harder then he meant to. There was a snapping sound and the man's wrist broke and he screamed in pain. Light however had no sympathy. This man had tried to kill him and he needed to be stopped. He single handedly grabbed the man by his shirt and in a blind rage threw him up against a tree where he crashed against it with enough force to daze him. 

Suddenly Light brought himself to a stop. He could feel his anger threatening to take control and he had sworn he would never allow that to happen again. Instead he dropped the man to the floor and knelt next to the terrified sicko. 

“If you ever come near me or my boyfriend again”, he said in a deathly quiet voice, “I will make sure you never bother anyone ever again”. He then called in the incident to the police. When they got there, Light used his natural charm and charisma to explain what happened and the police didn’t even hesitate to arrest the businessman. 

When the man started babbling about his knife bouncing off of Light the officer rolled his eyes and muttered something about the man being high. He assured Light that the man would be charged with attempted murder before dragging him away very roughly. 

Figuring it would be a good idea to get ahead of this, Light called Near and explained what happened. Near very calmly told Light that he would make sure the man paid for his crimes and then the phone was yanked away by a frantic sounding Gevanni, who was freaking out until Light reminded him that he was invulnerable and that he was just grateful the man went after him and not Gevanni. 

Gevanni breathed a sigh of relief and after promising Light he was going to come visit him after work he gave the phone back to Near, who had kept reminding Gevanni he was on work time the entire time he was on the phone with Light, and then promptly hung up as soon as he got the phone. Light made a mental note to check with L if there was any possible way Near was his kid. 

As Light arrived at home and opened the door he saw Sayu sitting on the steps with a cup of coffee in her hand and a shit eating grin plastered all over her face. 

Before she could say anything Light gave her a withering glance. “Have you been sitting there the whole morning” he asked, with as much disdain as he could muster. 

Sayu cackled. “Nope I happened to see you coming down the block and came here so i could greet my big brother home from his first date.” Light rolled his eyes and hung up his jacket. This was a mistake as when he lifted up his arms to hang it up, it exposed the cut in his shirt from the knife. Sayu’s eagle eyes spotted it right away. 

She walked up to Light and fondled the tear in his shirt. She looked up at him, all mirth gone and a deadly serious look on her face. “What happened?” She asked. Light stammered for a moment not sure what he should say but then he looked into her eyes and saw the worry and fear embedded in them. 

Light cursed himself. He kept forgetting how mature his little sister had been forced to become. Sighing, he motioned her over into the kitchen and over a cup of coffee he told her all about his morning. She gasped at all the right places and her expression softened when he told her about how well he and Gevanni got along. She even micro swooned when he told her about them kissing. 

When he got to the part with businessmen a look of absolute rage came over her although she did laugh when she heard about Gevanni’s reaction. Light then told her all about the incident that happened in the street and she gasped at the part with the attack and then gasped again when he told her about the knife bouncing off his skin. 

By the time he got to the part where he took out his attacker she was cheering for Light and hugging him in relief. “I’m so glad you're immortal,'' she said, looking at the tear in his shirt. “This would’ve gone straight into your heart otherwise.” 

Light started. He hadn’t realized how close the cut had been to his heart and he was determined to make sure the fucker got put in jail for life. 

After chatting with Sayu a bit longer, who was ecstatic to learn Gevanni was going to be coming to check up on Light tonight - ‘you better warn mom so she can prepare’ - Light headed upstairs and went over to his desk and opened up The Book of Life. For a second he looked around almost expecting Ryuk to be there looking over his shoulder as he worked. 

He shook his head ruefully. Ryuk was long gone and not coming back, and while he was grateful for it, he had still been a huge part of Kira’s life and it almost felt wrong for him not to be there. As these thoughts came over him he felt the presence of The Book of Life settle into their bond and suddenly he felt warm and peaceful and somehow powerful all at the same time. 

As Light carried on reading the rules he found himself more and more fascinated by them. There was a certain symmetry to the rules of the Death Note and the rules of The Book of Life. For example one of the rules of the Death Note had been that once a name was written it could not be erased. The same applied to The Book of Life although it was far more versatile. 

Writing in the name of The Book of Life could do many things. For example it could be used to wipe someone’s memories, either from a specific time or for time spans as long as a person's entire life. It could also be used to implant false memories although this process was far more tricky and if done wrong could be catastrophic. 

Other applications involved forcing someone to commit an act or do something against their will, as well as force them to not do something. Light could see how incredibly dangerous this book was. The potential for abuse here was incredible. 

However the first and second rule overrode all the others. Namely all actions Light used The Book for had to be in order to keep balance and Light could not benefit directly from anything he wrote in The Book. This made Light feel a bit better as it definitely helped curb the desire for abuse. 

There were plenty of sub rules to take into account as well many he was familiar with because of his memories as Kira. If a name was written down without a specific action or fate designated to them, then that person would be immune to the effects of The Book of Life for thirty days. However if an action or fate was written within six minutes and forty seconds then this would come to pass and they would not be immune. 

The rules were also a lot stricter for what you had to have in mind when using The Book of Life. You needed a face and a name, however you also needed to keep in mind the reason you were assigning whatever fate you wanted to that person. If The Book of Life determined that it was unjustified it could override its bearer and then that person would be immune to The Book of Life for thirty days just like if a cause had not been written. Of course this made Light determined to always consult with The Book of Life before he wrote anything in it. 

Another powerful ability of The Book of Life is to heal any person no matter how sick they were. Light wondered if this included things like re-growing limbs or healing old scars. The Book of Life wasn’t sure as it had never been used on humans until it was joined with Light. 

It could be used to extend the life of any mortal. The bounds on this were also very undefined, although it did appear that extending a mortal life well beyond what was normal for that mortal’s species was definitely frowned upon by The Book. 

Light wondered what would happen if he tried to heal someone close to him or if he tried to extend the lifespan of Sayu or his mother. There were so many questions and he wanted Kevin to return asap so he could ask him all of them. 

And then there were the rules of Death. This part sent chills down his spine. There was simply no getting around the fact that he was going to have to use this book to kill certain people who deserved it. The rules were all too familiar, having the person's name and face in mind although the reason for killing was also required. 

However one thing that made Light feel a bit better was Rule 38. The rule stated that a Death may only be sanctioned under the most extreme circumstances when no other course was possible, or to provide a great mercy to someone in pain. 

He also remembered that when L came along he would have an equal stake in deciding what gets written in The Book of Life. If there was one person Light would want as a check on his power it was the only other person smarter than him. 

Before Light knew it, it was evening and he heard his mother rummaging around making dinner. Cursing he realized he had forgot to tell her about Gevanni coming over. He hurtled down the stairs into the kitchen and started apologizing when his mother waved him off and explained that Sayu had already called her this morning to let her know Gevanni was coming. 

Light glared at his busybody sister who gave him a completely innocent smile and Light couldn’t help but laugh at her. 

About an hour later Gevanni showed up and when Light opened the door he immediately demanded to know where the guy had tried to stab Light. When Light pointed near his heart Gevanni immediatly rubbed his hand over the area, clearly checking to make sure Light was ok. 

Suddenly he seemed to realize he was in a public space feeling up his boyfriend and he stepped back blushing profusely. Light chuckled and stepped forward and grabbed Gevanni in a hug and kissed him passionately. There was even a bit of tongue before they stepped away from each other panting and they turned around to see Sayu looking at them, her eyes wide open with a huge grin on her face. 

She immediately came over and gave Gevanni a big hug and started babbling away while guiding him into the kitchen to say hello to Sachiko. Light found himself standing by an open door completely nonplussed at what had just happened. 

He ruefully closed the door and headed into the kitchen where Sachiko and Sayu were gleefully interrogating Gevanni about his past and Light immediately came and shooed them away reprimanding them for being so rude to a guest. 

Sachiko blushed with embarrassment and ran back to the kitchen dragging Sayu along with her and leaving Light and Gevanni alone to talk. Light apologized for their behavior but Gevanni laughed it off, saying he found it sweet that his mother and sister cared so much about him. Apparently Gevanni never felt he could bring anyone home to his parents as, while they weren’t overtly homophobic, they had no interest in meeting any men their son dated. 

Fortunately or unfortunately depending on your perspective, this had never been an issue as he had always been obsessively busy with work. And now work had delivered Light right into his lap. 

They made their way to the couch where they were able to talk in peace and quiet for the next half hour although Light could swear he saw the kitchen door open an inch and eyes peeking in on them every few minutes. 

Light took Gevanni’s hand in his and the two sat there in quiet conversation until Sachiko announced dinner was ready and the two headed to the table together. Light was shocked at how well it went. Gevanni it turns out was a natural at handling his mother and sister, and he had them in love with him before the meal was over (Sayu made sure to tell Light this, and that he better not fuck it up). 

After dinner they all headed to the couch where a very pleasant evening was spent talking about how insane the last five years had been and how happy everyone was that Light was back to his old self. 

WIthout even thinking about it Light put his arm around Gevanni’s shoulder who stiffened for a second in surprise and then melted into Light’s touch. Sayu visibly held back a squeal, and before he knew it, it was late and Gevanni had to get back to get some sleep. The last time someone had fallen asleep during a briefing Near had punished them by not giving them any cases for a week. 

Light grinned and gave him a kiss at the door before he left. Then he swore, grabbed his coat and ran up to Gevanni insisting on escorting him to the headquarters. This gave them another half an hour together and Light was almost walking on air on the way home. 

*****************

The next few days flew by and Light settled into a regular schedule of getting his life back together, helping out his mother around the house as well as the occasional melt down from Misa, who it seemed had become so dependent on Kira for everything, it was taking her time to realize she had been her own person before that. 

Near had decided that three days was more than enough time for one to recover from a life changing traumatic experience, and had started calling Light every day after that to bug him to come in and help them. To be honest Light was surprised it had taken him that long. 

However Light was determined to move at his own speed and give himself time to recover and told Near that he would come after he had had a month to recover. This of course did not deter him from bugging Light every day and after a while Light just started auto screening his calls. 

Meanwhile Light and Gevanni were taking things slow. Gevanni’s schedule had drastically ramped up but they still met every few nights for a date during the week and Light would hang out at Gevanni’s place on the weekend where they would cuddle and make out, but decided that they would have sex for the first time once Light moved into his new apartment. 

****************

Moving day arrived and Light was both excited, nervous and sad all at once. He was going to start a new life in one of the nicest apartments in Tokyo which made him excited, he was going to be on his own for the first time in his life, which made him nervous, and he was leaving the cocoon of his mother house, which made him sad. 

Overall however life was going really well. Now that she had no more financial woes Sachiko was the bubbly over protective mother she had always been, and Sayu was doing incredibly well with her therapy under the best therapist money could buy. She was even talking about getting back into dating again and was looking for a job. 

Light didn’t have much as he had left everything Kira had owned and left it for Misa, so moving in was as simple as his mother driving him over with his three suitcases of clothes to his new apartment. 

Sachiko was blown away at how stunning everything was and the private elevator to his penthouse was the cherry on top. When they entered foyer to the apartment they both just stood there for a moment appreciating the expansive living room and the beautiful glass windows that gave an incomparable view of the Tokyo skyline. 

They then headed into the master bedroom on their left, and Light almost fangirled over the massive walk in closet which would actually be enough for all his clothes. He flopped down on the king sized bed already in there, revelling in its luxuriousness after sleeping on a twin for two weeks. 

In a rare moment of impropriety Sachiko jumped on the other side and sighed as she felt pure Egyptian cotton sheets underneath her fingers. Then her expression changed and became sad. Puzzled Light asked her what was wrong. She sighed and apologized, explaining that she couldn’t help but think about Soichiro and how much he would have loved a bed with all this space on it. 

As a tear fell down her cheek Light rolled over to her side and embraced her in a bone crushing hug just trying to be there for her. After a minute or two she shook her head and smiled. 

“Enough tears” she said firmly and got up from the bed. “Your father wouldn't want us moping around on moving day. Let’s go see the rest of this stunning apartment." 

They stepped out onto the balcony next where the view was even more noticeable and all Light could think about was one day bringing L out on this balcony to share all of this beauty with him. In the short term though, the thought of bringing Gevanni here made him smile as well. 

There were also two side bedrooms for guests and Light assured his mother she was more than welcome to come visit and stay over anytime, although he privately hoped she wouldn't come too often, as he really wanted to start making his own life here. 

After she left Light wandered over to the fridge feeling stupid as he did, knowing that it must be empty. To his surprise it was full of home cooked meals and fruits and vegetables and Light blessed his mother as he dug into one of them with gusto. 

By the time Light had unpacked his clothes and made some calls it was already evening and he took a well deserved break on the couch. Soon after his bed called to him and Light barely had the energy to undress before climbing in, feeling like he was in heaven at the plush duvet and the sheets that carrased his skin like silk. 

He was too tired to jerk off from the day's efforts but tomorrow Gevanni was coming over and he was determined to break both the bed and his virginity before the night was out. WIth a smile Light fell asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always wanted to write a scene where a homophobe attacks an all powerful gay person, so this was some great wish fulfilment. Also I'm very jealous of Light's new apartment lol.


	20. Light's First Time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light goes back to work with the Task Force, but he finds a nasty surprise waiting for him. Also smut ahoy!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is where this story finally earns its E rating. Enjoy!

Light woke up the next day in his new apartment. He literally felt like a new man and was excited to get back to work with the Task Force as they had decided to call it. After all Kira was long gone. 

After jumping in the shower and getting dressed Light headed to Task Force headquarters and made his way inside. The security was just as tight as when L was running it, and though Light didn’t really need security now he was still grateful the rest of the team were well protected. 

It was a very weird feeling to walk inside and know that L wasn’t there and that Watari would no longer be around bringing them snacks and giving L updates, as well as keeping them appraised of the latest developments in the Kira case. 

The other gaping absence was his father who had always been there as a firm pillar of strength for Light to lean on when he had been himself. 

Light was slowly coming to terms with all the hurt but he knew it was going to a while before he could walk into headquarters without feeling an almost crippling sense of loss. 

Light couldn’t help but bristle when he saw Near was sitting in L’s chair, even though he knew he had no reason to be mad. It also helped that Gevanni was sitting there and his face lit up as soon as Light walked into the room. 

He walked over to Light and hugged him and then presented him with a cup of coffee. Light took a sip and was surprised that it was exactly how he liked it. Apparently Gevanni had been taking notes on their date. Impulsively he leaned over and kissed the handsome detective and then, realizing they were in front of the entire task force, pulled back blushing. 

Gevanni however looked quite pleased with himself and as they headed to the main console to meet with Near Gevanni ran his fingers tantalizingly down Light’s back as they walked and Light shivered in a good way. 

Gevanni headed to his desk and Light automatically went to sit next to Near, who gave him a side glance before completely ignoring Light and going back to work. Fortunately Light was used to this behavior from L and tried to login and get started before realizing he didn’t know his user credentials. 

He turned to Near to ask how he was supposed to login when Near, without even looking at him slid him a piece of paper with Light’s username and password. Light snorted with laughter. His username was LightYagami but his password was K!r@!$d3@d which was computer talk for KiraIsDead. 

Light gave an incredulous look at Near who wasn’t even bothering to look in his direction, so he knew it wasn’t him, however his enhanced hearing could make out muffled laughter behind him and he whirled around to glare at Matsuda and Gevanni who were both studiously looking at the ceiling with their lips clamped shut clearly holding back their laughter. 

When they both glanced down and saw Light glaring at them with a look that promised death, they burst out into peals of laughter and a second later Light joined them unable to hold back. The laughter only intensified when Near turned around and gave them all a haughty look of derision at their childish behavior. 

The laughter made Light feel a million times better, and he knew this little prank more than anything showed how he was fully accepted back into the team. After logging onto the system Light was able to use his familiarity with it to look into all the cases the team were working on. 

It seems in the short two weeks they had been working Near and the team had already solved five major cases and there were three open ones outstanding. One of them was the kidnapping of a prominent Japanese politician , the other was the murder of notorious mob boss in Italy and the third was the theft of a valuable necklace that was being showcased in the Louvre in Paris. 

The kidnapping case would have to wait as this one was local and Near wanted firsthand evidence. The murder case hit too close to home so he got started on the theft case. There were a ton of photos that had been sent as well as police reports and fingerprints to analyze. 

Light was thoroughly enjoying himself and for the first time in weeks, he was putting his formidable intellect to work on something that was actually a challenge. He glanced over at Near who was talking quietly to Rester and he could make out that they were discussing the murder case. Near seemed to be using his toys to visualize the crime scene and Light was almost impressed at how close a replica he had built just using Lego. 

Light was startled out of his absorption into the theft case, he already had it narrowed down to two suspects, when he felt two hands rest quietly on his shoulders and start giving him a gentle massage. He didn’t need to turn around to know exactly who it was and he had to hold himself back from moaning as the massage was really good. 

He felt a voice right by his ear, “Ready to have some lunch, sexy?” 

Light couldn’t help the smile that crept up on him and he nodded before getting up and informing Near that he was heading out for some lunch. Without even looking his way Near informed him that he had exactly an hour and to please make sure to be back on time. 

Light and Gevanni rolled their eyes simultaneously but agreed and headed out. There was a wonderful cafeteria down the road from headquarters that Light and L had frequented during Light’s memory loss days. 

He made sure to choose a different booth and Gevanni, noticing his slightly tense set to his shoulders, asked what was wrong. Light sighed and explained about how this place reminded him of L. Gevanni asked if he would rather go somewhere else, but Light declined. He explained that he had to start moving on with his life and he couldn’t let his past with L hold him back from living. 

The good news was Gevanni was such an easy person to talk to, and Light was having such a good time he was able to actually really enjoy his lunch before they had to rush back to headquarters so they wouldn't be late. It turns out Near was a stickler for the rules and he was able to deliver a verbal beat down with the best of them when he wanted. 

As the day wore on Light got engrossed by the theft case and he was looking over one of the photos when he spotted something. He excitedly grabbed Near by the arm to get his attention. Near looked at him in shock, clearly not used to anyone touching him, but Light didn’t give a shit and pulled him over. 

He pointed out on one of the photos something that everyone else had missed. There had been a very subtle footprint right near the crime scene that had vanished in between the time the two photos had been taken. That and the list of people on the scene at the time along with surveillance footage only left room for one person to be the culprit. 

“The tour guide did it!” They both breathed simultaneously. Then they both smiled at their dual realization. Near was already making a call for the tour guide to be arrested and Light leaned back in his chair, his hands clasped behind his head as he reveled in solving the mystery. It was a high all on its own and he wondered how long he could do this before his Guardian responsibilities caught up with him. 

As he was browsing around the system Light noticed a report that had been buried, clearly trying to keep it hidden from the team. It was also encrypted and password protected but Light took this as a personal challenge. 

It took over an hour but Light hacked his way into the file and immediately saw why it had been hidden. It turns out that after Kira had been announced dead a cult had developed in worship of him. Light cursed himself for not thinking about this possibility. He had essentially created the closest thing to a living, actual God the world had ever seen, and people had started cults and religions on far less. 

Light looked at all the articles and research Near had done on them, and he saw that at least for now the cult was relatively harmless. However there were worrying signs. 

Their numbers were growing rapidly for one and while they were peaceful at the moment, only espousing the judgement of the wicked by Kira in the afterlife, there was a growing number who believed that this judgement should be fulfilled by his followers in the real world. 

Indeed a few prisoners had been found mysteriously murdered in prison with the word Kira written on their chests. 

Light could feel sweat starting to form on his brow. He had thought the Kira business was over and done with and here it was popping up again except this time it was worse in a way. Whereas before it had been only one person now it was a growing cult, and Light knew enough history to know how hard it was to stop those once they got going. 

Luckily it was around home time when he saw this as Gevanni had come over to see how much longer till he was finished and spotted what Light was looking at. “Fuck!” He said vehemently and grabbed the mouse, completely shutting down the file system and forcing Light to look at him. 

He seemed about to berate Light for looking at the documents but then he looked into Light’s eyes and he sighed before sitting down next to Light and holding his hand. 

“Are you ok?” He asked, clearly concerned with how Light was coping with this new bombshell. 

Light shook his head. “No, of course I’m not. Why didn’t anyone tell me that a new religion based on Kira had formed? Maybe I could have done something to stop it?” 

Gevanni stopped him in his tracks. “The reason none of us told you, is that this is the last thing you need right now. You’re still recovering from your trauma as Kira and the last thing any of us wanted, except for Near perhaps, was to dump this new load of guilt onto you, even though” he said emphatically, “this is not your fault. You can't be expected to take responsibility for all the idiots out there.” 

“Except those idiots are only doing what they’re doing because of Kira.” Light countered. “And it's only a matter of time before they decide to start taking matters into their own hands and start killing people. And who knows how long it will take before that happens.” 

“Actually it will take a lot longer then you think Light Yagami.” Near’s childish voice popped up and Light jumped forgetting he was sitting right there. “Did you honestly think I would just let a Kira cult develop under my nose and do nothing about it?” 

Light stared at him, hope beginning to form in his chest. 

“I anticipated that this might happen as soon as we announced your death so I had one of my agents in Japan infiltrate the organization almost as soon as they formed. She has been working behind the scenes since day one, hampering them and making sure that they grow as slow as possible.” 

Light frowned. “But the report said they were growing rapidly? So whatever you’re doing isn’t working.” 

“Not true”, Near retorted. “While their numbers are growing rapidly we are able to turn people off the path almost as fast as they come into the fold. Also we have police harassing the more fanatical members, and almost every single member who has committed a murder has been caught. We are keeping it quiet for now but we plan to start showing exactly what happens to those who murder in the name of Kira.” 

His expression was grim and Light felt a bit better. At least someone was keeping on eye on this developing situation. “Are you sure you have it under control?” He asked. “I need to make sure that this cult does not take off.” 

Near looked at him with an annoyed look. “I promise you if I need assistance with this I will let you know Light Yagami.” He then turned around and promptly ignored Light and carried on with his work which at this point seemed to involve a large complex made from multiple Lego sets and enough figurines to fill a small village. 

Gevanni in the meantime had grabbed Light’s coat and was unceremoniously shoving Light into it and hurrying him out the door. Light found it both endearing and annoying at the same time but he realized that Gevanni wanted to get him away from the whole situation so Light could focus on other things. 

As agreed they headed straight to Light’s apartment where Light was going to break in his new kitchen by cooking a meal for both of them. As it was a fairly short walk to Light’s apartment from headquarters they walked it and Light felt Gevanni grab his hand and fold his fingers into Light’s. Light felt a comforting warmth spread throughout his body and and thanked God he was wearing tight pants as he had gone hard as a rock. 

Gevanni’s mouth fell open when he entered Light’s apartment and he audibly gasped at the incredible view, which was only growing more stunning as the sun set and the city lights came on. 

Light gave him a grand tour which was almost a mistake as they started making out heavily when they reached the master bedroom. Fortunately Gevanni had enough self control to stop them until they were finished with dinner. 

Light got started and the time flew by as he made his mothers famous dumplings and teriyaki chicken with fried rice, and between the cooking and the easy conversation with Gevanni the hour and a half it took to make dinner flew by. 

They dug into the meal with gusto and Light was impressed at how well the meal had come out. Gevanni was a fast eater and he was done long before Light was even half way finished. 

It turned out though, that Gevanni had a plan, and he stalked his way around the table and before Light knew what was happening he was straddling Light’s lap facing him, and skillfully manipulating a piece of chicken with the chopsticks he started feeding his boyfriend. All the while he was slowly grinding his clothed cock against Light’s. 

Light had never thought about food and sex simultaneously but turns out the two went really well together, and Gevanni sensually fed him the rest of his plate, all the while grinding into Light cock and driving him crazy with lust. 

They were barely able to clean off the table before Light dragged Gevanni over to the couch but this time he had Gevanni laid out underneath him where they proceeded to make out like teenagers grinding into each other, and feeling each other up with the frantic need of two men in their twenties. 

Light wasn’t sure when his shirt got removed, but Gevanni whistled appreciatively and felt up Light’s smooth toned chest and Light very quickly found out how much of an endogenous zone his nipples were. Gevanni rapidly went from feeling them up to feasting on them. He started alternately biting and sucking on them and Light almost came from raw sensations flooding through him. 

Fortunately Gevanni had an innate sense of when Light was about to come and he kept backing off right as Light was on the edge. The edging only made Light more and more horny and they hadn’t even removed their pants yet. 

Light decided some revenge was in order so he slid his way off the couch and quickly stripped Gevanni of his shirt, pants and underwear. Light took a moment to appreciate Gevanni’s stunning six pack and when he yanked off his underwear an average sized but beautiful cock emerged. 

Light dove down on it determined to get Gevanni as horned up as he was. It turns out that Light was a natural cocksucker and he had very little problem with gag reflex as he deep throated Gevanni, who moaned in ecstasy as Light worked his throat muscles and milked Gevanni’s cock as hard as he could. 

Gevanni lost all self control and he swore loudly as he grabbed Light’s head and shoved the last inch into Light throat before cumming like a horse, his cum shooting out for at least a minute before falling back exhausted against the couch. His cock slowly fell out of Light’s mouth and Light felt the last dribbles of his cum land on Light’s tongue. 

Light savored the flavor and in a moment of instinct he surged his way onto Gevanni’s lap and started making out with him, feeding Gevanni’s cum right back into his own mouth. 

Gevanni’s eyes shot open at this, but then he groaned in appreciation and they snowballed the cum between them before Light swallowed the cum with a single appreciative gulp. 

Gevanni was rock hard again and he flipped Light over and yanked Light’s own pants and underwear off in one go. He stopped and stared in evident shock at Light’s cock which was at full mast. 

He turned to Light with a look of awe on his face and Light started panicking inside. Was something wrong? Was his cock weird or fucked up in some way? 

Before he could work himself into a panic Gevanni said “How big are you!?!” Light’s eyebrows wrinkled. He knew he was decent sized but he never thought of himself as being particularly large in the dick arena. Gevanni suddenly surged to his feet and ran over to the side table where he grabbed a ruler. 

Light took the moment to appreciate Gevanni’s muscular hairless bubble butt and decided that before the night was out he was going to be buried between his ass cheeks. 

Gevanni came back and held Light’s cock up against the ruler. Light’s cock was easily bigger than the ruler and after some careful measurements they measured Light’s cock at 13 inches. 

“Is that big?” Light asked. 

“It’s fucking massive” Gevanni exclaimed. “It’s easily the biggest cock I’ve ever seen and it’s thick as fuck as well.” He seemed almost intimidated by Light’s cock. 

Light started to cover himself up. “I don’t want to make you feel bad or anything.” He said with a worried tone. “We can always…” Gevanni ripped Light’s hands away and glared at him. “Don’t you fucking dare cover up the hottest cock I’ve ever seen.” 

Light blinked in surprise. He hadn’t seen that coming. 

“I just needed a moment to get used to the sight and also to appreciate how big you are.” He knelt down and reverently held Light’s cock in his hand all the while rubbing it up against his face before making his way to the tip and engulfing it in his mouth. 

Light felt a spurt of pre-cum ejaculate into Gevanni’s mouth and Gevanni started chocking. Light immediately apologized but stopped when he saw Gevanni swallow the cum and dive right back onto Light’s cock with gusto trying to take as much of it as he could. 

Light could feel the pre-cum pouring into Gevanni now but the detective was expecting it now and he swallowed it with relish, clearly loving the taste. He was only able to get about six inches down his throat, however his enthusiasm more than made up for this and Light could feel himself rapidly approaching climax. 

“I’m gonna cum!” He warned, holding Gevanni’s hair and trying to pull him off. Gevanni was having none of it and forced another two inches of Light’s cock down his throat. 

“FUUUUUUUCK!” Light yelled as he started cumming and it felt like Gevanni was sucking out his soul through his cock, and Light was loving every second of it. After a minute it became too much even for Gevanni and he pulled himself off of Light’s cock although he kept his mouth firmly suctioned around the head, swallowing every mouthful of cum Light gave him. 

Only after there was nothing left did he make his way onto the couch. Light could see cum splattered all over his chest and realized Gevanni had cum, unaided, along with Light. 

They cuddled up together basking in the afterglow, Light’s head resting on Gevanni’s muscular chest. They lay still for about half an hour, Gevanni running his fingers slowly and lovingly though Light’s hair and Light rubbing his hands appreciatively over Gevanni’s muscular chest. 

It wasn’t long though before both their libidos got going again and Gevanni followed Light into the main bedroom where they carried on making out like teenagers. Light flipped Gevanni onto his stomach and Gevanni gave him a surprised look before he saw Light’s eyes flash wickedly as he parted Gevanni’s ass cheeks and dove in, feasting on his hairless pink hole with gusto. 

Gevanni moaned and swore as Light almost attacked his hole nibbling on it enthusiastically, and he stuck his tongue inside as far as he could reveling in the clean, musky flavor and he instinctively started tongue fucking him. 

At this point Gevanni was swearing up a storm cursing out Light for having the best goddamn fucking tongue and how he was gonna cum if Light kept this up for much longer. 

Light grinned wickedly and started working him over even harder before taking some mercy and moving up Gevanni’s back kissing his back as he made his way slowly but surely up his spine mouthing it every few inches. 

As Light was nibbling Gevanni’s neck he felt his cock come to rest in Gevanni’s crack and Light instinctively started fucking his cock between Gevanni’s ass cheeks, as he started kissing and mouthing Gevanni’s neck leaving plenty of hicky’s unintentionally along the way. 

Gevanni was a mess, periodically swearing and moaning Light’s name in absolute bliss right up until, as Light was frotting himself between Gevanni’s asscheeks, the head of his cock bumped up against Gevanni’s hole and stopped. 

Both Gevanni and Light froze and Gevanni’s head whipped around and he stared at Light with a startled expression, clearly worried about Light’s massive cock working his way into his asshole. 

Light grabbed him by chin and kissed him deeply and lovingly. “Ill only fuck you if you choose it sweetheart” he said letting Gevanni know that the choice was completely his. 

Gevanni gulped and nodded, giving the go ahead, scrunching his eyes closed and gripping the sheets tightly. 

Light suddenly felt pre-cum start pouring out of his cock, liberally coating his cockhead and seeping deep into Gevanni’s asshole. Light started applying pressure and they both gasped simultaneously as the head of Light’s cock popped inside and Light immediately came to a halt watching Gevanni’s face for any sights of pain. 

Somehow he only had a blissed out expression on his face and Light tentatively moved forward, his cock’s constant pouring of precum heavily lubricating the way for Light to move ahead one inch at a time. 

Before he knew it he was balls deep inside Gevanni, and they both groaned at the pure pleasure it was giving both of them. 

Light worked his arms underneath Gevanni’s shoulders and then clutching Gevanni’s shoulders in a reverse grip he proceeded to fuck him with everything he had sensing the detective could take it. 

Gevanni screamed in pure pleasure as Light started railing into him, his massive cock reorganizing his insides, and Light could feel his cock working his way through a second sphincter deep inside Gevanni. Neither of them stood a chance of lasting long through this and it was only a few minutes later, with a load “FUUUUUUUCK” Light was blowing his load so far up Gevanni’s asshole he didn’t even know where he was. 

Gevanni came almost simultaneously at the sensation of Light unloading inside him, and Light could feel his hole stuttering and grasping at Light’s cock which only made Light come even harder. Gevanni was sweating up a storm, but Light wasn’t sweating at all. Still the exertion had him collapsing on top of Gevanni breathing into his ear how insanely hot he was, and how his cock and Gevanni’s asshole were a match made in heaven. 

Gevanni snorted at the analogy but was too tired to retort and they fell asleep like that, Light’s cock still buried deep inside Gevanni’s hole.


	21. Enter the Yakuza

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Light and Gevanni are going strong, and their relationship is flourishing. But there's a new threat in town, one determined to kill Kira if possible.

Light was feeling drowsy but in a pleasant haze as he woke up the next morning. He had been having the most amazing dream where he was being sucked off by Gevanni and… - he looked down to see Gevanni sucking his cock, his eyes closed in pleasure and slowly and sensually working his mouth up and down Light’s prodigious length. 

Light moaned in pure pleasure and biting his hand to hold back his groans he felt Gevanni speed up his sucking now that he knew Light was awake. Light thrust his hips forward and felt the last few inches of his cock drive down into Gevanni’s throat, who started choking a little before powering through his gag reflex, and before Light knew it he was blasting his cum down Gevanni’s throat. 

Gevanni gulped it down, and then grinning he made his way up Light’s body kissing it every few inches and paying a lot of attention to Light’s nipples before moving his mouth over Light’s and kissing him. 

Light was shocked for a moment when he felt something from Gevanni’s mouth drop into his and he realized Gevanni had kept some of his cum and fed it back to Light. For a second Gevanni looked a little worried that he had gone too far but then with an easy smile Light swallowed the cum and in an exaggerated fashion licked his lips. 

Gevanni let out a deep laugh and went right back to kissing Light passionately and thrusting his tongue into Light’s mouth as far as possible, the two vying for dominance. 

After a while Light, using his superior strength, maneuvered Gevanni into sitting on his face as he ate out the man's tight hole. Light shoved his tongue deep inside and felt the cum he had deposited there last night trickling down into his mouth. Instead of grossing him out Light went absolutely wild and started slurping and biting gently onto the rim, as more and more of Light’s enormous load dribbled into his mouth. 

In the meantime Gevanni was cursing up a storm and suddenly Light felt him cumming all over Light’s chest. As soon as Light couldn’t feel any more cum he lay on his back, whereupon Gevanni licked up his own jizz and fed it into Light’s mouth. 

It was official, Light was addicted to cum. 

Afterwards as they lay together in pure fucked out bliss, their limbs so entwined together so that Light didn’t know where he ended and Gevanni began, Light realized that he had never felt more safe and loved, except for that one time he and L had held hands together in bed, 

A beat of sadness thrummed through Light as he mournfully realized that as good as this was with Gevanni, his true happiness waited down the road. 

He turned to Gevanni who looked concerned at the grim look on Light’s face. 

“Gevanni” he began, and then paused not knowing how to continue. “I hope you know that I would never want to take advantage of you and that I would never lead you on. It’s just that when L return’s, I’m going to reunite with him as he is my soulmate and I don’t want you to lead you on or anything…”

He gave a deep sigh. “What I’m doing a very bad job of saying is that this can't be a permanent thing and…” Gevanni quieted him with a kiss that took Light’s breath away. 

“Stop overthinking this,” he admonished. “We’re going to take this slow and see where it goes. And I've always known that L is your paramour so there’s no need to feel guilty. I’m a grown man and I can handle it when the time comes. In the meantime let's just enjoy what we’ve got together. 

Light beamed and then he spotted the time. If they wanted to shower and eat before going into the office they would need to get up right away. 

They both cursed as they stumbled out of bed although showering together was definitely a perk and Light was more than happy with the extra blowjob he got in there. In a moment of inspiration he grabbed Gevanni and flipped him so Gevanni’s cock was level with Light’s mouth and they could blow each other simultaneously. 

They quickly cleaned each other off and got dressed, and in a moment of inspiration Light ordered a hot breakfast to be sent to the office ahead so that they could eat when they got there and save a bit more time. 

****

When they entered the office together Light could see everyone was on purpose trying to not look at them too much, so they clearly were dying to know what had happened, well everyone being Mogi.

Matsuda and Aizawa were sitting next to each other and doing a horrible job of trying to conceal their fumbling, under the table touching each other’s legs. Near as usual was oblivious to everything except his models and the case, and Rester and Lidner were too busy flirting with each other to notice anyone else. 

Light was holding Gevanni’s hand as they came in and he let it slide out as they made their way to their own desks. As soon as Near saw him he turned to Light and informed him about a new case that had come up. 

It turns out that the Yakuza had started becoming very active again since Kira had been proclaimed dead. Unfortunately they seemed determined to come back with a vengeance and Near was equally determined to stop them before they could get going. 

Light was all for it. He hated Kira with everything he had but a small part of him celebrated at the decimation he had committed on the Yakuza leadership. Of course Kira had then proceeded to wipe out every single member he could find a name for so that kind of took away any joy there. 

A chilling thought suddenly occurred to him, one that had his heart lurch in a raw panic. He whirled around to Near. 

“Near!” he said frantically, “My mother and sister!, If the Yakuza find out that I was Kira they’re going to go straight for them to get to me.”

Near looked at him completely unperturbed. “And how are they going to find out you were Kira?” He asked. “As far as the world is concerned Kira died in a shootout with police and his body was damaged beyond recognition. 

Light had heard of the cover story they had used but there was a deep, vital flaw. “I know that” he said, his voice losing none of the panic he was clearly feeling, “But we have dozens of witnesses to the contrary, both from police and everyone who was at the jail where you, or rather the Shinigami King” he corrected quickly, “tried to have me killed. If even one of them slips up…” he stopped at thought of how stupid he had been. How had he not thought about this sooner!?!

Near however was not looking any more perturbed then he normally did and a small part of Light wanted to shake the boy genius just to see some kind of reaction from him. 

“Well it would be a problem, IF those witnesses actually remembered anything about that night” he said, and then promptly went back to playing with his models. 

Light gaped at him for a moment and they, physically holding himself back from strangling Near he choked out, “What are you talking about?”

Near looked back at Light with a politely confused expression on his face. “I’m pretty sure I was clear with you Light Yagami, They have all forgotten about you, It’s like that night never happened for any of them.”

Light stared at Near, blinking in soft confusion. “What do you mean they have forgotten about me? No one could possibly forget what happened that night! How is that even possible?” And then it hit him. 

The Book of Life had done everything in its power to protect Light before and it had more than enough power to wipe someone’s memories. Apparently it had determined that protecting Light would involve wiping everyone’s memories of the events of that night, and it had been spot on in that regard. 

Near in the meantime had carried on talking, “Well to be honest the only thing that makes sense is that they were removed by The Book of Life, as you very correctly noted that dozens of people don’t just forget about that kind of event.” 

He was already turning back to his model but added “I believe that the reason we all still remember what happened is because of our exposure to the death note, although that is purely a hypothesis” he added almost as an afterthought. 

He was most likely correct as this was the only thing that made sense, although once again this was something he would want to ask Kevin about. However he felt a lot better now and the panic was almost completely gone. 

Light had gotten so absorbed into his work he almost yelped in surprise when his phone buzzed. He surreptitiously took it out and glanced at the screen. It was a message from Gevanni.

“Fifth floor bathroom, five minutes”

Light almost went a bright purple as he looked around. Gevanni wasn’t in the room and everyone else was too absorbed in their work to even look at him. 

After three minutes Light slipped out and headed to the fifth floor. He arrived at the bathroom with a minute to spare. 

As he came in he saw Gevanni leaning against the sink with his arms crossed and a smirk on his face looking like sex on a stick. 

Light didn’t say anything but stalked forward and grabbed Gevanni around the waist. He thrust their groans together as he eagerly devoured Gevanni’s mouth with his own. 

It was fast and dirty, and the two thrust against each other with aggressive movements and before Light knew it both of their pants were down around their ankles and Gevanni had both of their cocks in his hand thrusting them together as they furiously made out with each other. 

Light was hard as a rock due to the almost illegal nature of the encounter as well as the speed which Gevanni was going at. Within five minutes he could feel his ejaculation coming on and he was barely able to warn Gevanni who grunted and came right alongside him. 

Their combined cum pooled into Gevanni’s open palm and he lifted it up to Light who’s eyes opened wide and then he opened his mouth and let Gevanni feed it to him. Immediately a shock of energy ran through him and he felt energized. He made out with Gevanni again before they both pulled up their pants and quickly headed back to their desks. 

At the entrance to the office Gevanni motioned for Light to wait a few minutes and then he headed in, a few minutes later Light followed. He thought they may have gotten away with it, however a couple of minutes later Matsuda made his way over to Light to give him some paperwork and as he leaned down he looked Light right in the face and winked knowingly. 

He stifled a laugh at Light’s expression and headed back. Light quickly took out his phone texted Gevanni “We're never doing that again! Matsuda knows!”

Gevanni looked around at Matsuda with a level stare. Matsuda lasted for all of ten second before he looked away abashedly. 

A few seconds later Light’s phone buzzed again. “Same time tomorrow?”

Light glanced back at Gevanni who was was looking at him with a look of wide eyed innocence. Light’s reply was two words “Fuck yeah!”

****************************

Before he knew it a month had gone by since Light rejoined the task force and his life had never felt better. He and Gevanni were going strong and the only thing they struggled with was finding time to satiate their voracious sexual appetites. 

Gevanni noted that it must be something to do with Light because before hand he had been ok with jerking off a few times a week and the odd fuck here and there. 

However now they could barely go an hour without thinking about fucking each other, and it was decided for the sake of the team that the two would have their own office where a strict don’t ask don’t tell policy was in effect. 

Of course this didn’t stop Near from trying to barge in whenever he wanted to consult Light about something and more than once Gevanni had been sitting on Light’s lap with Light’s cock deep inside his hole, or hiding under Light’s desk sucking him off when Near tried to walk in. 

Fortunately the boy genius was lost in his own world and never even noticed anything going on even though both he and Gevanni were flushed and their clothes all disheveled. 

These encounters only made things hotter and Light was starting to worry if he was becoming a sex addict. Gevanni pretty much lived at Light’s place at this point although if the two of them were horned up enough after work they would do the much shorter commute upstairs to Gevanni’s room. 

In the meantime Matsuda and Aizawa seemed to be taking it very slowly. Aizawa had come out to his wife and while the encounter had been incredibly painful for both of them, she was appreciative of his truth and had bought the whole ‘past trauma being triggered’ story they told her, although it was very close to the actual truth minus a few fantastical elements. 

It had been agreed that no spouses or family members were to be made aware of the supernatural elements of their past work, as this could put them in harm's way. The one exception of course being Light’s family although with everything they had been through no one begrudged them this. 

Aizawa and his wife had separated and gotten divorced in short order and they both wished each other well. 

Aizawa had moved in with Matsuda as he couldn’t afford a place by himself in Tokyo and Matsuda confessed to Light that while they were moving very slowly on the physical front due to Aizawa’s past, they were falling in love with each other a lot quicker then either of them expected. 

Light took Aizawa aside one day and handed him the card for the therapist that Sayu was going to. Aizawa paled and explained he couldn’t possibly afford such an expensive therapist. 

Light knew his pride would never let him accept either his or Kevin’s money so he had spoken with Near and got him to agree that therapy would help Aizawa be a better detective and that the task force would cover all his costs. 

Aizawa was so happy he almost hugged Light but at the last second he awkwardly held out his hand and shook Light’s. 

The Yakuza in the meantime had declared war on the Task Force and were trying with all their might to find out who the elite team was who kept taking out all their most experienced members. 

Fortunately Near had adopted L’s complete anonymity function and no one knew who he was, even the Chief Justice who had seen him, had forgotten everything to do with that fateful evening. 

However they now needed someone like Watari to act as an intermediary between them and the NPA. 

They kept coming up blank though. They needed someone they could trust implicitly and who the police were willing to trust as well, however it couldn’t be any of the Japanese police on the task force as they would be recognized from their voice. 

The solution ended up being simple. Rester had always been kept around for his muscle more then his mind although he was far from stupid, and it turns out he had vital contacts in the NPA. 

Considering he was already basically Nears minder, he fell into the role like a natural and even took delight in wearing the over the top trench coat and hat. 

However Light and Near were struggling to get to the true inner circle of the Yakuza. It turns out that having almost your entire organization murdered by someone who only needed a face and a name to do it, made for an extremely secretive inner circle and no matter what they did they couldn’t get anyone inside it. 

Light was starting to struggle with something as well. It had started out small. His eyes sparkled with a little extra Light, his hands always seemed to be extra warm and his sexual needs had gotten even more intense. 

However as the weeks went on things started getting worse. His eyes were starting to glow with an intense light of their own, reminding Near of the Guardians glowing pupils and his hands while not getting any hotter were starting to glow as well. 

And his sex drive was now through the roof. He could barely focus on work and Near officially put him and Gevanni on temporary leave so that Light could figure out what was happening. Gevanni had been an unfortunate casualty in all this as his sex drive had gone up to correspond with Light’s, and the two were fucking almost non stop barely able to take time to eat, sleep and shower. 

Then all of a sudden everything calmed down. They woke up one day and Light’s eyes were only glowing mildly, his hands were back to normal and their sex drive was back to where it was before, which meant they were only having sex five or six times a day instead of fifteen or twenty. 

They got back into their regular work schedule however Light was really worried about what was happening to him. He didn’t know if it was his bond with The Book of Life or his Guardian abilities, but something was playing havoc with his system and he had no idea how long it would be before it hit again. 

He tried consulting with The Book of Life but it was almost like a child in a lot of ways as it had essentially been newly reborn when it had been put back together again. Also any knowledge it had was based on Shinigami physiology and his human body was completely new to it. 

Fortunately there was something to distract him from all this. It turns out that the leader of Yakuza had slipped up, and not realized his office door was ajar right as one of their informants were standing guard outside. 

The informant hadn’t been able to make out much but a single name and place had clearly been audible. The name had been Misa Amane and the place had been Hachiko Square. He had also heard the words ‘kill her’. 

Light felt a chill run down his spine. Misa had a massive meet and greet coming up in two days and that was in Hachiko Square. Near however was worried this was a trap to flush out any informants. 

It was almost too convenient that their informant was able to make out those two distinct names, especially after how careful and overprotective the Yakuza had been. However Light couldn’t just leave Misa to her death on the off chance this was a real trap. 

So Light came up with the idea. As almost no one was aware of who he was due to him vanishing off the face of the earth during his Kira days, he would go backstage and protect Misa during the event. He would keep his face well covered and as he was invulnerable and with heightened senses he would be more than capable of being able to protect her. 

Misa was absolutely delighted at this prospect and while she seemed to have gotten over her crush with Light, her ear splitting screams of joy when Light came over to tell her of the plan almost made him regret getting his heightened senses. Almost. 

Gevanni had come along and Light saw him go bright red with anger as Misa came up to Light and hugged him without letting go for at least five minutes. 

Normally Light would have peeled Misa off of himself after five seconds, but he was enjoying Gevanni’s reaction far too much to stop her. It took about about five minutes before Gevanni stormed over and ripped Misa off of Light who squealed in protest. 

Gevanni glared at Light for a second, clearly getting Light’s game, but then he grabbed Light in a deep, searing kiss and this time there was no subservience, he was determined to let Misa know exactly who Light belonged to.

Light felt Gevanni shove his hands down to Light’s ass and started groping and manhandling Light’s cheeks. Light gave back as good as he got, and it was a few minutes later that they split apart and looked at Misa whose mouth was wide open in surprise and arousal as the performance in front of her. For once in the long time he had known her Misa was speechless. 

After she calmed down they went over the plan explaining that Light would meet her at the event and keep a careful eye out after which they would hand her over to a private security force Near had organized. The police were too porous and Near was worried about a Yakuza being embedded in their ranks which was very likely. 

Fortunately it was completely normal for celebrities to have their own private security, so Light was confident that their plan would keep Misa safe with very little risk of giving away their informant. 

At the event things were going very smoothly. Misa for all her flaws was a natural with her fans and relished in the attention. She even did an impromptu performance of her latest hit and Light was shocked at how good her voice was. 

He made a mental note to speak to her manager about letting her actually perform, and not just produce auto tuned garbage that she was currently putting out. 

The attack when it happened would have been far too fast for any normal person to react to. However Light’s senses had gone into overdrive a few seconds before and he had felt the danger emanating from the short, almost completely innocent looking woman who had been getting MIsa’s autograph. 

In the few seconds it took for her to whip out her knife Light was already there easily grabbing her arm and yanking her down to the ground. It was over in seconds and Near’s private security had her in custody almost before anyone knew what was happening. 

Misa, who had been completely shaken up by the attack even though she was expecting it, was shivering on the backstage and could barely walk as they got her into the car. 

Feeling sorry for her Light gathered her over to his side, put his arm around her comfortingly and calmly spoke to her until she had calmed down and wasn’t trembling anymore. She wasn’t even close to being back to her normal self when they dropped her off at her apartment with a full time security detail but Light promised to come check up on her later that night. 

When he arrived back at HQ Near was looking at a very familiar setup. The girl from the attack was strapped to a chair with a surveillance camera trained on her at all times, although unlike with Misa they had her in a regular handcuff situation with no gag, although she was blindfolded. Near confirmed that this was to protect the anonymity of anyone who went inside to interview her. 

So far she had been completely uncooperative, but Near seemed confident that he could break her and Light had a distinct feeling he was right. 

The girl was glaring in the general direction of the camera and Light smiled. The fact that she was allowing obvious signs of anger meant she was inexperienced at holding back her feelings, and would likely be able to be goaded into giving information she didn’t mean to. 

Light left it to Near and Gevanni who was surprisingly adept at manipulating people. It took longer than he thought it would although by the end of the day she was spilling her guts out 

It turns out that while everyone had forgotten Light was Kira, Misa had no such protection and someone on the police force had let slip that Misa had been the second Kira. While she had not been responsible for any Yakuza deaths directly they were determined to make an example of her by proxy. 

Light bit his lip. Misa was in mortal danger and there was no way to protect her twenty four seven if the Yakuza were determined to get to her. Even he couldn’t possibly be around her full time. 

He started thinking it through. There was one being who knew who could help protect her and until he returned Light would just have to try and keep her alive. 

Fuck! Why did he feel so responsible for someone who he only knew thanks to Kira and had been nothing more than a nuisance to him ever since he had known her. 

He sighed. It didn’t matter, the simple fact of the matter was he was going to make sure she was ok until he knew she was safe. 

Fortunately Near was willing to help her with private security. The team he hired was Israeli ex-military, completely incorruptible and even the Yakuza were scared of them. But then there was where she would spend her evenings. Both Light and Near groaned as they waited for Misa to arrive at the one place secure enough for her to spend her nights. 

Task Force Headquarters.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They may be a delay in next weeks posting as I've fallen a little behind in Light Morningstar, but Ill try have the next chapter up asap. As always kudos and feedback are life.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you like the direction where I'm taking this fanfic. I know there's a lot I haven't explained yet but this is intentional and don't worry. I will be explaining a lot in the next few chapters.


End file.
